Adventure From Silence
by The Lori C
Summary: Hearing-impaired Steffi Devlin discovers a whole new world outside her disability when she encounters Brian Kendrick through her friend and interpreter Dallas Collins.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

"Steffi," Dallas Collins told his longtime friend. "I think it's time."

"Time for what?" she signed to him.

"It is a new year, lady, which means time for you to seek some new adventures."

Steffi shook her head. "Things had been the same for me since I was three years old. Why bother changing _now?"_

"That's just it," Dallas replied. "Not only do you need to expand your world a little more, but also I'd like to take you somewhere tonight to get you started out of this shell you'd been in for several years."

Steffi looked a little nervous. "Where are we going?" she signed.

"We, my dear, are going to a wrestling match tonight. I know how much you enjoy them on TV, and I thought experiencing one live would be good for both of us. I've been to several shows, but I'd like to take you to this one to enjoy it with me."

"I don't hear well," Steffi protested. "I might not be able to enjoy it."

"They have accomodations for hearing impaired," Dallas smiled at her. "I don't want to hear any more protests. I've made all the arrangments and you are going with me. You might meet some other new people too. Steffi, you've been closed up too long; your folks are gone and all you really have are your work and the few people you've known for years. You can't spend your life shutting yourself out because of your hearing problem. I don't want you as an old woman regretting the things you never got to do because you limited yourself."

"Meet people?" Steffi signed. "Oh God."

"I'm sure you are not the only person with a hearing issue the world has encountered." Dallas gave her a teasing smile. "Who knows, you might even find yourself a nice boyfriend when you get out more."

Steffi gave him a playful punch in the arm. "Very funny. Okay, I will go. How bad can it be?"

Dallas gave her an approving nod. "Now that's my girl."


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

"Dallas," Brian said, shaking his hand. "Good to see you again. It's been way too long, you old dog."

"No argument there," Dallas nodded. "It isn't like you get around to these parts very much these days."

"Well, I don't exactly decide the schedule. Anyway, what's this about bringing someone along tonight?"

"Just a longtime friend that doesn't really get out much. Steffi's idea of a day out is a shopping trip to Wal-Mart once a month. Shes….shy, which would be kind of the best description."

"In that case, I may scare the girl," Brian said, laughing.

"Not in the least," Dallas shook his head, "at least once she knows the _real_ you."

_Meanwhile:_

Steffi stared into her closet for the longest time, wondering what to wear that night. Dallas had said she didn't need to 'dress up' for this kind of thing, but nevertheless she didn't want to embarrass him in front of his friends by showing up in something that would be totally out of place.

She finally settled on her nicest jeans and a pink and orange sweater that was one of her favorites but didn't get to wear it very often. Digging in a drawer, Steffi also found a matching pink scrunchie and socks, putting them with the outfit before checking the batteries in her hearing aids. They too were fine, even though Steffi wasn't sure what good they would do at a place where Dallas would be taking her.

Grabbing up a towel, Steffi then went into the shower and then put on some simple, light makeup and pulled her dark hair back into a ponytail, adding the pink scrunchie. Noticing the time, she then dressed and gathered up her purse and shoes. Dallas would be arriving soon, and she didn't want to keep him waiting.

_That evening:_

"That was a good show," Steffi signed to Dallas.

"I told you you would enjoy yourself," he replied. "See what kind of things you miss when you shut yourself off from the world?"

She nodded. "I guess so. But where are we going now?"

"I'd like you to meet some friends of mine," Dallas answered, "particularly an old one I don't get to see very often."

"Oh really, Dallas, I shouldn't—" she began.

"Come on, Stef, nobody's going to bite, at least not yet anyway. It's just a couple of people. Honey, you're not the only one in the world with a limitation. You need to come out of your shell."

Steffi sighed. "Okay. I guess one or two people wouldn't hurt."

"Good, I was hoping you would say that."

"There's another thing."

"What?"

"I'd like to see you do less signing and more speaking. You've been picking that up very well and what better time to use it than the present?"

"But I don't talk right like other people," Steffi protested.

"Of course you may not be as clear as other people. A person with a hearing capacity of only thirty percent can't be expected to do so. It doesn't mean you shouldn't use it more. Come on, work with me here. Besides, not everyone knows sign language."

"All right." Steffi sighed again. _Why was he suddenly making her do all these things?_

Dallas then grinned, spotting Brian going away from a group of people. "Hey, Bri!" he called.

"Hey, you old dog, there you are! About time your happy ass showed up."

"Well, I figured you'd be busy with your array of admirers so we hung out somewhere else for a few."

Brian then spotted Steffi. "Are you holding out on me, Collins? I didn't know you had a lady in your life."

Dallas laughed. "Where are my manners? Actually, this is a very good friend of mine, Steffi Devlin."

Brian and Steffi exchanged hellos, Steffi nodding a little and smiling.

"Quiet one, isn't she?"

Dallas smiled. "This is all new to the lady. Be nice."

"No problem here, big man. Did you two have dinner yet?"

"Actually, we were on our way to find a place when I spotted you."

"Perfect timing. I'm buying. You and I have some serious catching up to do and I can get to know your lovely friend here as well."

Dallas laughed. "Now how can I pass up a free dinner. You pick and we're there."

Steffi looked at both of them, totally lost. Dallas reassured her that it was perfectly fine. "He's not as scary as he looks, Stef, trust me," he added.

She bit her lip agreeing to go along, wondering what this crazy new world had in store for her.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

"I don't think Steffi likes me very much," Brian sighed later that evening as he and Dallas chatted on the phone once Dallas had gotten Steffi home safely. "What did I do wrong? She's a cute chick."

"I don't think it's you, buddy," Dallas shook his head. "Like I said earlier today when we talked, she's shy and doesn't go out much. But there's something else you need to know that I didn't want to bring up in front of Steffi, because frankly, she's a bit self-conscious about it."

"What?" Brian wondered.

"Steffi has a hearing impairment. She was in an accident when she was three years old and it left her with a seventy percent hearing loss."

"She's…._deaf?"_

"Practically. Steffi has internal hearing aids, knows sign language and reads lips, but the whole thing bothers her, which is why she doesn't go out in public much unless I'm with her. I'm just surprised she agreed to come to the show tonight."

"Jesus, Dallas, I just hope I didn't come across as too insensitive or something. I really didn't know about that."

"Of course you didn't," Dallas agreed. "And you did perfectly fine. It's all new to Stef, and it wouldn't shock me in the least if she was just plain fascinated with you."

"Girl's got a weird way of showing it; she kept looking at me like I was some kind of alien that came down from the mother ship."

"Brian, Stef was probably reading your lips," Dallas pointed out. "Don't be so hypersensitive."

"Oh…..okay. Guilty conscience."

"Nice to know some things haven't changed about you with success," Dallas said, chuckling.

"And perhaps they never will," Brian replied. "I got to go. I just heard a card key slide in my door, which means dumb ass is back from wherever he went. Got to entertain and be entertained by Mr. Excitement, you know!"

Dallas laughed as he hung up the phone. There was no doubt about it; Brian would be both a great friend and morale booster for Steffi. He certainly had a good feeling about _that._

_A week later:_

"What do you have there?" Paul wondered when he had come to visit Brian for a few days.

"What does it look like?" Brian looked up from the book he had been engrossed in and grinned.

Paul looked curiously at the cover. "American Sign Language? Damn, dude, I didn't realize you could read at all, much less anything educational."

"This coming from a man who was reading _Miss Spider's Tea Party _in our hotel room just last week," Brian countered. "You can't even sit still to read _Tom Sawyer _long enough, let alone anything like this."

"I can be smart; besides, there was nothing better lying around. And what's the fascination with sign language all of the sudden?"

"Dallas has this friend that's nearly deaf and I'd like to communicate with her some way."

Paul quirked an eyebrow. "_Her? _Must be someone fascinating if you're getting back into women now."

"Very funny, smart ass. You know the homo jokes get old after awhile. You're just jealous because you can't rock a Speedo like I do."

"Yeah, well, at least you still have a job to rock your Speedo in," Paul sighed.

Brian gave him a reassuring pat. "Don't worry, buddy; your no-compete clause is up in about another month and then the sky's the limit for you. Plus, I always got your back no matter what."

"Thanks, man. It's good to know at least one person does."

Brian's phone rang and he glanced at the number on the screen. "Hey, great, it's Dallas. I'm guessing he's going to be able to travel and make the show next week, at least I hope that is the case."

"And he brings his deaf friend," Paul added with a knowing grin.

"Maaaaaaaayyyyyybe." Brian then took the call.

"Better brush up on that sign language then, dude. I have a feeling it will be coming in handy sooner than you think."


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

"Did you enjoy the city tour?" Dallas asked.

Steffi nodded, smiling widely. "It was great, and even better you brought Brian with us."

He couldn't help but laugh. "Oh, it's his _first name _now? For a long time, he was just my friend."

"He's learning sign language, Dallas. It's funny; he messes up sometimes, but it's okay."

"Ahh, nothing like winning a girl's heart than learning another language," Dallas teased, making Steffi blush a little.

"Stop it," she signed, giggling.

"I've noticed you're talking more when you're out in public too," he nodded. "I knew a few changes would do you some good."

"You said yourself I have to go out and do new things sometime," Steffi replied, shrugging.

"Before, you always fought any of my suggestions," Dallas pointed out, "which is why I was initially shocked when you agreed to come with me on this trip. To be honest, though, I don't think a new adventure or even I were the reasons you actually did."

Steffi gave him an odd look, blue eyes widening. "What do you mean?"

"I'd say the reason you really came comes in the form of a five foot seven, one hundred and eighty five pound blond haired specimen."

She began to blush again, smacking Dallas playfully. "It is _not!"_

"Then why do you blush every time I mention him?" Dallas was clearly enjoying himself.

Steffi looked down shyly, shrugging.

"It's perfectly fine, honey," he reassured her. "To be honest, if I didn't know any better, I'd say he was fond of you too. Otherwise, I'd seriously doubt he'd go out of his way to learn sign language."

_Meanwhile:_

"Why do we have to hang out with Dilton or whatever his name is tonight?" Paul whined.

"His name is _Dallas," _Brian glared at him. "Besides, do you have anything better to do, or am I taking away your cruising for random skanks time?"

"No," Paul replied, looking down. "They're not exactly beating down the door much these days since I got canned."

"Well, cheer up. Dallas is good for the morale and besides, he brought Steffi with him."

"I should have known there was a good reason you were so enthusiastic about this, considering you went on that cheesy tour this afternoon and now you smell like a French whore."

"Better than smelling like armpits. Jesus, Paul, put some damn deodorant on."

"What time are we meeting up with them in the lobby?" Paul asked, putting on some antiperspirant before throwing on a clean shirt.

Brian glanced at his watch. "About twenty minutes," he replied. "Shit! How's my hair?"

"It's hair," Paul said, grinning. "You think I give a fuck?"

"Damn it, ass wipe," Brian stomped into the bathroom. "I should know better than to ask _you_ anything."

"You've been weird ever since you met that chick," Paul pointed out. "What so different about her from any other one you've come across besides being nearly deaf?"

"Maybe because she isn't some random slut that is obviously out to get laid so they can have bragging rights to their friends that I fucked them. Dude, come on; she's a nice girl. She's smart and she has _class. _And when you meet her, you'll probably like Steffi as much as I do."

"The way you've carried on about her the last couple of weeks, she better be something special. So what movie are we seeing?"

"_Yes Man," _Brian replied. "Dallas has been wanting to see it."

"Ah yeah, good choice. I already saw it. It's kickass, you'll love it."

"Give any of it away, Paul, and I will stab your eyes out with an ice pick."

"I'm saying nothing."

"Good Mexican slave boy," Brian teased. "You ready to go?"

"Any time you are, lover boy." Paul made kissing noises.

"Very funny. Be warned, do not make an ass of yourself, do anything to embarrass me or them if you don't want to be stabbed."


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

"That was a great movie, guys," Dallas praised later that evening after they had come out of the theater. "Thanks for the review, Paul; you were right on the money."

"No problem, my man. And what was even better was Brian treating us." Paul gave a goofy grin.

"Mooch," Brian replied, punching him in the arm. "Don't get too used to it; your no-compete expires next month, which means you'll have to get your lazy ass back to work and make your own damn money."

"478 offers in your inbox," Dallas nodded in agreement. "Better get to shuffling through them."

"Like you never mooched off of me when you were broke, Spanky," Paul countered. "Who paid your overdue electric bill this time last year? Not to mention you ordered five hundred dollars worth of porn off my cable."

"Which I paid back every dime," Brian said. "Don't mess with me."

Steffi shot to attention. _"Spanky?" _she wondered.

"It's a long story, Steffi," Brian told her.

"And what a story it is," Paul snickered.

"Dude," Brian warned. "Not the time. There's a lady present."

"So?"

"So be decent for once. I know you have it in you."

"I have a list of YouTube videos Stef has been watching," Dallas said, changing the subject.

Steffi smiled over at Brian, "Your old matches," she explained.

He was clearly flattered. "Catching up on my work, huh?" he signed to her, making Steffi smile wider.

"Dude, what did you just say to her?" Paul asked suspiciously.

"None of your business," Brian replied, clearly enjoying driving his best friend nuts with his newly learned skill.

"Don't worry, Paul, it wasn't about you or anything dirty," Dallas reassured him. "Now, any particulars on where to eat?"

"Hotel room service," Brian yawned. "I'm fucking beat. Unlike numbnuts over here, I had to work earlier tonight."

"Shut up," Paul said, blowing a raspberry.

Steffi looked at Brian, concerned. "If you were tired, we could have done this some other time," she said.

"No, it's fine, sweetheart," he grinned at her. "I wasn't going to be a bore after you and Dallas made the trip here. Are you guys joining us up at the room?"

Dallas nodded. "I'd love to. The rest of the night is wide open for me. How about you, Stef?"

She nodded enthusiastically. "I'd like that."

Paul began making kissing noises again before Brian punched his arm. "Grow up," he warned.

_Later:_

"Food will be up in about half an hour," Brian announced, hanging up the phone.

"Jesus, I'll be dead from starvation by then," Paul whined.

"I don't know how you can be hungry again after all that shit you ate at the movie theater," Brian replied. "I think you ate more than I, Dallas and Steffi combined."

"I'm a growing boy," Paul grinned.

"You're a growing boy all right, fat ass," Brian teased.

"I am not fat. I'm bigger boned. Meanwhile, while you're standing over there with a finger up your ass, throw in a movie, Spanky."

"_Pineapple Express," _Brian said, sliding in a DVD. "This should keep you quiet for awhile."

"Paul quiet? That's a new one," Dallas laughed.

"I can be quiet," Paul answered, giving Dallas a look.

Brian nodded and grinned before going over to Steffi and took a seat next to her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. She leaned her head on his shoulder and he smiled wide.

"If you start making out, I'm going to barf," Paul warned.

"Unlike you, my slave, some of us are _gentlemen," _Brian countered.

"Yeah, you a gentleman! Since when?" He tossed a pillow at Brian.

Brian tossed it back at him. "Just watch the movie, asshole."

A knock came on the door. "Room service," a voice announced from the other side

"At last!" Paul cried, as it if it had been days instead of half an hour.

Brian walked over and opened the door, smiling wide as the trays of food were wheeled in. He signed for the food and included a sizable tip.

"Damn, you're being generous tonight, my man," Dallas grinned, eying the array of food.

"Nothing but the best for my friends," Brian grinned back. "Dig in. Remember, Paul, save some for everyone else."

Everyone then settled in to watch the rest of the movie, eating their meals. "I never knew Spanky could be so generous," Paul teased.

"Dude, knock it off with the 'Spanky' shit," Brian warned, tackling his own food.

"Maybe we should visit more often," Dallas agreed, cleaning his plate. "What do you think, Stef?"

She nodded and smiled, finishing her ice cream.

"Oh God, I think I'm going to puke," Paul said, lying back on the bed with his hand on his stomach and his arm thrown over his eyes.

"Serves you right for being a fucking pig," Brian answered.

"Look who's talking. You ate three burgers," Paul countered.

Brian then let out a loud belch, which startled Steffi and caused her to jump.

"Freaking hell, dude, that had to be a loud one if the lady could hear it," Paul said. "Poor thing about jumped out of her skin."

"Hearing aids," Steffi pointed to one of her ears. "Up loud."

"I'm sorry, Stef," Brian consoled her. "Excuse me for that."

Dallas gave him a wide eyed look before he began to chuckle. "Good God, Brian, if I didn't know any better, I'd think you were brought up in a cave."

"Maybe he was," Paul joked. "I've known him eight years and still have to wonder."

"And as hairy as you are, I'd have to wonder if you were raised by wolves," Brian joked back.

"Perhaps I was a wolf in another life." Paul began to howl, which made Steffi laugh.

"Hey, look, Bri, I made your woman laugh. By God, I still have it."

"Of course you do," Brian answered. "But go out and get chicks on your own because the days of me getting your seconds are far over."

About halfway through the movie, Steffi began to yawn.

"You can use me as a pillow if you want," Brian grinned at her, shifting to the head of the bed so that they could get under the covers and rest on the pillows.

"Now is that a class act or what?" Dallas asked approvingly. Steffi nodded and smiled back at him.

"Hey, lovebirds," Paul cracked from where he and Dallas sat on the floor. "No making out up there. Dallas and I don't want to have to really puke and waste good meals."

"Jealous ass," Brian said, tossing a pillow at him. "Just shut up and watch the rest of this."


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

Paul had answered the phone the following morning when Dallas had called. "I'm guessing Sleeping Beauty hasn't woken up yet?"

"Sleeping Beauty? Dude, have you _seen _Brian when he gets up in the morning? Scary shit. Anyway, he's in the john cleaning up. Let's just say good old Spanky had sort of….a little problem during the night and woke up to a nice surprise."

"Is it safe to ask what kind of surprise? A fan breaking in the room and scaring the shit out of him or something?"

"No, nothing like that." Paul then lowered his voice. "Brian had a wet dream."

"A _what?" _Dallas asked, shocked, before starting to laugh. "My God, I don't think I had one of those since I was thirteen and fantasizing about my math teacher."

"Well, it was either that or dude was rubbing one out in his sleep last night thinking about Steffi," Paul said. "In any case, he woke up to one hell of a mess this morning. I bet the hotel maids are really going to have something to discuss when they find that shit. Good thing checkout is at noon."

"Paul, who the fuck are you talking to?" Brian's voice bellowed in the background.

"Dallas," Paul answered. "I guess he wanted to say good morning."

"Oh good. I figured you were running your hole to someone else about you know what." Brian then came on the line. "Hey, Dallas, what's happening?"

"Not much, just wanted to check in to say hello and thanks again for the party of sorts last night."

"No problem, my man. You and Stef got any plans for today?"

"Not yet," Dallas replied. "She's getting dressed now, in fact."

"Perfect. Since we're all checking out anyway, I thought I'd take you to lunch and wish you bon voyage before you went home."

"If we stay around you long enough, we'll gain a ton of weight," Dallas chuckled. "But yes, I'm sure Steffi would love to, as would I."

"Good, we'll meet you in the lobby at eleven thirty. I just have to wait for dumbass to get his shower."

"Won't be as long as yours was, dude," Paul laughed in the background.

"Paul, shut up and get your fat ass moving!" Brian yelled before going back to the phone call with Dallas.

_A short time later:_

"Is this all right?" Steffi asked, showing a simple outfit.

"Beautiful," Dallas smiled. "It's just a casual lunch before we go home, Stef."

"I know, but I want to look okay and not embarrass anyone."

"Rest assured you won't," he soothed. "Frankly, those boys do a good enough job of embarrassing themselves."

Steffi nodded, going to dress and pulled up her hair before they grabbed their bags to put into Dallas' rental car and then going back in to wait for Paul and Brian.

"Ready for your latest adventure?" Dallas smiled down at her.

Steffi nodded. "I think I like this already."

"I think I know exactly why, especially after last night," he teased.

"Dallas, stop!" She blushed. "Here they come."

"Right on schedule," Dallas boomed, patting Brian's shoulder when they met.

"Yeah, shocker, right? I had to wait for Mr. Ego over here to finish primping. God, what a queen. And I thought the divas were bad."

"Shut up," Paul whined. "I can't help I want to look good in public."

"Yeah, but you don't have to be all OCD about it," Brian countered. "How long does it take to shit, shower and shampoo? Jesus."

"Anyway," Dallas interjected, "there's a coffee shop on the other side Stef and I passed when we were loading the car. That okay or were you up to some traveling?"

"Works for me," Brian grinned. "Let's go."

They went into the small shop and found an empty booth in the back that would be a sure bet where Brian wouldn't be bothered. Dallas slid in beside Paul while Brian took his place beside Steffi, and they scanned the menu.

Paul looked across the table and began to snicker.

"What?" Brian asked. Steffi too had a confused look on her face.

"Nothing, just noting how cute you two look." Paul let out another snicker.

Brian shot him a dirty look. "You fucker. You told them, didn't you?"

"Just me," Dallas said, trying not to smile.

"Oh hell," Brian groaned. "Christ, Paul, you have the biggest mouth. And you wonder why I don't bring you with me that often anymore."

"It was funny," Paul said in protest.

"Yeah, we'll see how much you yuk it up when and if it ever happens to you."

"What happens?" Steffi was now curious.

"Nothing, love," he replied. "Man stuff. Not exactly something to be discussed at the table, in fact."

"Oh," she said, not quite sure what it was, but dropped the subject nevertheless.

"Especially _that," _Paul grinned.

Brian gave him another look. "Knock it off before I smack the taste out of your mouth, boy. Now let's drop it and order."


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

In the coming months, Dallas had been thrilled to see Steffi finally coming out of the cloistered world she had lived in from the time she had been a child. He wasn't sure if it had been that first step he had made her take, the fact she had loved exploring new things from that first time on, or even having Brian in their lives.

Perhaps it had been the combination of all of them, but whatever the case, Dallas had been pleased with Steffi's progress.

She had indeed changed. Not only had he noticed she was signing less and talking more, but also Steffi had been paying more attention to her appearance. It wasn't anything fancy, but Dallas noticed she was more well groomed and choosing her clothing more carefully. It was indeed a good sight. Steffi was still shy, but it was being made clear that she was now raising her standards from how she had been living the last several years.

One evening, Dallas had also discovered another secret of Steffi's.

Though she had communicated with some people via her computer, she hadn't been on it very often in the past with the exception of doing things for the workshop for the hearing impaired where she had been working for the last few years and writing her journal.

Now it seemed she was on it on a more regular basis, and Dallas figured she couldn't have been suddenly doing that much work or journaling.

When he found out why, Dallas couldn't help but smile. Steffi had been a little embarrassed at first to being caught chatting with Brian on webcam, but Dallas had laughed it off and encouraged the communication, seeing how much it had made her happy.

With the exception of the shows they went to together at every opportunity and Steffi parked in front of the TV to watch Smackdown every Friday night, it wasn't like they saw Brian very often anyway.

_At least it wasn't some pervert like I originally assumed, _Dallas had thought.

He had also been thrilled that Brian had been taking the time to stay in touch with Steffi in spite of his own busy schedule. He had even made a "Hello, Steffi!" sign on cam with symbols of hugs and kisses, which she happily kept.

Dallas had laughed when he had come across it in their photo account. Steffi had bitten her lip and blushed when he had discovered her little treasure.

"Why don't you put it on your friend page, Stef?" he asked. "It's a nice thing he did, and maybe some of your friends would like to see it. Kind of a shame to see all that creation go to waste, don't you think?"

It was now Steffi's turn to laugh. "Creation? He made that in like _two minutes."_

"Still, no reason to hide it in our photo account."

Steffi nodded. "Okay. I guess you're right."

She had also come to Dallas one afternoon with another shocker.

"I want to quit the workshop," Steffi had announced.

He was taken aback. "Why? Did someone there upset you? That's no reason to leave, Stef. I'm sure you can work it out."

She shook her head. "No. It's time I lived a normal life. I need something else."

"But you haven't known anything but the workshop."

"Dallas, you've gone on for how long for me to live a different life, and now that I want to, you don't want me to do that."

"Steffi, when I said that, I didn't mean to drop the work you'd been doing for years. I know you get money from your parents' estate and that's enough to live on, but really, what other skills do you have?"

Steffi gave him a smug look. "I can write," she said proudly. "And I can go to college."

Dallas perked up a little. "_College? _Why didn't you say so?"

She went over to a drawer, showing him a pile of catalogs. "I sent for these."

"Any idea what you want to study?" he asked.

Steffi shook her head. "Not yet, but I want to go."

"Well, you have plenty of time to decide," Dallas encouraged her, "and if you need any help in getting the ball rolling, I'm right here as always. Just make sure you give at least a two week notice to the workshop."

She pecked him on the cheek. "Thank you, Dallas. I knew you would understand."

_The following afternoon:_

"You know, Dallas, Stefanie's earned more than enough credits here to apply to a possible degree at any accredited school," Tina Becker, Steffi's workshop supervisor, advised him. "I always had high hopes for her, but until now, it seemed Stefanie didn't really have much interest in going further than where she was."

"Well, Tina, let's just say Steffi's made a new friend that's given her a boost of confidence of sorts and leave it there," Dallas replied. "When she told me she wanted to leave here, I was shocked at first, but that was before she mentioned college."

"Whoever this friend is, they must be a good influence," she smiled.

"Oh trust me, you have no idea. Actually, he was an old friend of mine before I introduced Stef to him a few months ago."

"I should have known you'd have a role in this too, Dallas," Tina chuckled. "But in any case, whoever this new friend is, I would advise keeping him around for awhile, because whatever they're doing, they need to keep doing it, because I always believed Stefanie could go places."

"You and I both, Tina," Dallas agreed. "You and I both."


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

_Steffi:_

_How about an adventure of our own tonight, preferably **without **Dallas? Let me know._

_-Brian_

Steffi stared at the note tucked under the door of the room she shared with Dallas when they had traveled to another show a few days later. She wasn't sure what to think; it wasn't like she had had any experience going out with men before, especially a _hearing_ man and one of Brian's status. She had always either been in a group of other hard of hearing/deaf people or with Dallas, if she'd gone out at all.

She was totally lost. Maybe she should ask Dallas when he came back from working out at the hotel gym.

When he did return, Steffi showed Dallas the note and wondered what to do.

"Well what do you know?" he grinned. "The day has finally come for your first solo date."

"Then it's _okay?" _she asked.

"Anyone else I would have my reservations," he answered. "But this is Brian and I trust him completely. With you eventually heading to college, you have to learn to fly without me sometime, kid."

"All right," Steffi nodded. "But I never did this before."

Dallas gave her a wink. "Just let him take the lead. Now go give him a call and say yes. He just came up on the elevator with me when I came back from the gym."

_That evening:_

"Got a hot date, huh?" Paul asked with the ever-present cheesy grin.

"Awful damn nosy, aren't you?" Brian responded. "I thought you were going to hang out at the bar and hit on some skanks anyway."

"I can pick one up and we can make it a double date."

"No thanks; I've seen the freaks you've picked up. Stef's probably nervous enough as it is without you coming along and dragging some random bitch to boot. I want some alone time with her and your happy ass better be out of the room when she and I get back."

"Yee haw! Brian's going to get laid!" Paul cheered.

"Will you get your mind off your dick for a minute? That isn't what I have planned at all. We're going out to eat and then coming back for a movie, which I'd like to watch _without _your commentary for once."

Paul gave a mock pout. "And here I thought you liked my commentary."

"Preferably _after _the movie ends," Brian replied. "Not during it and embarrassing the shit out of me. Now come on, shove ass and put some pants on; Stef is going to be here in a few minutes."

"Gee, and you're not even smelling like a French whore tonight. By the way, your hair's a mess."

"God damn it, Paul," Brian cried, going into the bathroom. "Do you have to be such a pain in the ass?"

"Just making sure you're perfect for your hot lay tonight," he grinned, gathering up his things to leave. "I'll be at the bar wowing the ladies with my dark looks and outstanding charm."

"Good," Brian called from the bathroom. "Just keep your ugly mug down there for a few hours."

_A short time later:_

Steffi got on the elevator with a nervous sigh, getting off on Brian's floor and made her way to the room, knocking on the door. She heard a groan from inside.

"Paul, for the love of Christ, I told you to make sure you had your damn key…."

Brian threw open the door without seeing who it was and stood there shirtless. His face turned slightly red. "Oh….hi Stef. Sorry, I thought it was The Mexican Idiotica." He cleared his throat.

Her cheeks also flushed. "You're not ready. I can come back in a few minutes."

"No, no, I was about done anyway. Come on in." He grabbed his shirt and slipped it on, but didn't button it just yet.

Steffi observed the suitcase on the floor, its contents askew. "Were you packing?" she wondered.

"No, I…uh….had a hard time deciding what to wear," he replied. "I finally decided on this." He gestured to what he was wearing, the shirt still not buttoned.

"Fix your collar," she giggled. "It's sticking up."

"Huh?"

"Here." Steffi fixed his collar. "That's better."

"Thanks," he said softly, his eyes connecting with hers and taking both her hands. "Steffi…"

Without another word he cupped her face and kissed her hungrily. Her hands slid around his neck, allowing him to pull her body to his.

"Brian," she gasped, pulling away. This was all so new to her.

"I know," he replied going back to nuzzling and kissing her neck.

"This is kind of wrong, isn't it?" Steffi wondered, eyes wide.

"Depends on what your definition of wrong is," he replied, giving her a devilish grin as he backed her up to the bed. Dinner would have to wait.

_Meanwhile:_

"Hey, Dallas!" Paul yelled across the bar. "Come over and join us, man!"

"Nice to see you haven't lost your touch as a stud," Dallas teased, eying the two blondes that were sitting with Paul. "Good evening, ladies."

"Hi," they responded in unision, eying Dallas approvingly.

"Let's see, this is Angie and Stella," Paul introduced the girls. "And girls, this handsome devil is Dallas. Yes, that is his name in case you were wondering."

Dallas had to laugh; it had been a long time since he'd spoken to women outside of Steffi or the people he'd worked with. He hadn't really had much time for dating since his divorce, though he and Diane had remained good friends. Dallas had even attended her second wedding.

"So what is everyone drinking?" he asked.

"The usual shit," Paul grinned. "Why, you buying?"

"Actually, I was hoping you would," Dallas joked. "But let me handle this round anyway. I have all night until Steffi comes back."

"Provided Brian doesn't bore her to death," Paul laughed. "In the meantime, let's have a party of our own. Booze and blondes; it can't get any better than this."

_Late that night:_

Steffi stepped out into the hall and made her way to the elevator, her thoughts were on the night with Brian and what had transpired. She'd not only had her first real date, she also was no longer a virgin.

When she got to her and Dallas' room she entered quietly, figuring Dallas was probably asleep since he was not a person for late nights. She assumed correctly; he was snoring in his own bed. In any case, Steffi was also shocked to find Paul occupying the couch.

Not wanting to disturbed them, she tried her best to navigate in the dimness of the room, but bumped a side table when removing her shoes, which woke Dallas immediately.

"Steffi?" he asked sitting up and switching on the lamp.

"Dude, bright," Paul complained, throwing his arm over his eyes.

"Steffi's back," Dallas informed him.

"And what is he doing in our room anyway?" she wondered, indicating Paul.

"Brian kicked him out for your date," Dallas replied knowingly. "Did you have a nice time?"

_"Looks _like some little girl had a good time," Paul said sleepily. "Don't you always wear your hair in a ponytail?"

Steffi's hand jerked to her hair, which was still down. "Oh….I decided on something different." She felt herself blushing.

"Right," Paul nodded. "Anyway, thanks for letting me crash here for a few hours, Dallas. I'm going back to get some juicy details from my little buddy. Nice to see he kept Stef alive, though."

"Get out of here!" Dallas chuckled, throwing balled up socks at Paul, who laughed on his way out.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

"Aha! So you _did_ get some!" Paul cried the next morning. "I know that look; it's usually after you nailed someone."

"Are you done yet?" Brian asked, annoyed. "For your information, it wasn't meant to happen; it just did. Second, this isn't exactly going to be one of those hit it and quit it things."

"Wow, you actually dig that chick."

"Thanks for pointing that out, Captain Obvious."

"Yeah, but how are you two actually going to communicate? What do you have in common?"

"Why do you think I learned sign language, dipshit? You'd also be surprised how many interests we _do_ share. May I also add I'm bringing her back to Venice next week, with Dallas' knowledge, of course."

"Holy shit, this is serious."

"Exactly."

"I never thought I'd see the day this would happen to you, Spanky."

"I'm not like you, Paul. I'm not exactly looking to screw anything that breathes these days."

"I'll have you know I have standards," Paul sniffed.

"Sure you do. They have to have a pulse, a size 2 dress size, bleached blonde hair, tattoos, big, fake ass tits, and be ready to fuck on demand."

"You got it," Paul grinned. "Life's too short."

"And you wonder why all the _nice_ girls end up with the short guy." Brian shook his head.

Brian's phone then rang. He picked it up and smiled at the number on the screen, which had been Steffi's TTY number.

Paul picked up on his best friend's glow and made kissing sounds. "Lover girl is calling."

"Shut up, Paul, and get your shit packed. We got to check out in half an hour."

With that he stood and took the call from Steffi, going into another room to be out of Paul's earshot.

_Later that day:_

"What are you doing, kiddo?" Dallas asked.

Steffi turned away from her laptop and smiled at him. "Looking up Venice stuff."

"I'm guessing you're looking forward to your little trip next week."

"Yes, but a little nervous."

"You have nothing to worry about, Steffi. Not only are you going to be visiting a beautiful city and state, but you also have a great man to spend time with there."

"Yes," Steffi agreed, lost in thought.

"What's wrong?"

"I've never been outside of my hometown before, Dallas. I don't know what to expect. What if I go someplace where no one will understand me?"

"Steffi, you're going to have these challenges when you go to college. Think of this as a preparation of sorts. Brian will most likely be with you the majority of the time. You have this wonderful opportunity; don't pass it up because you have a few nagging anxieties."

She had to smile at the mention of Brian's name. "Maybe you're right."

"I know I am," he nodded. "And remember, being I'm loaning you my digital camera, I want lots of pictures."

.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

Dallas and Brian had been right about one thing; Venice _was_ beautiful. There had been Venice Beach, the circus-styled Ocean Front Walk, tennis courts, Art Deco storefronts and hyper-modern glass facades Steffi had never seen anything like it.

The weather had also been new to Steffi; she who had been born and raised in the cold winters and average summers of the Northeast, a woman who was more used to wearing cats and gloves in January instead of a sun dress, surrounded by men who wore jeans and ball caps with various sports teams' logos. She felt pale in comparison to everyone she had seen in Venice so far.

Steffi took the ubiquitous pictures of attractions with Dallas' camera to send back to him, including many where she and Brian had been goofing off on the beach. She didn't like photos of herself very much, but figuring it was a favor to Dallas, Steffi decided it was best to grin and bear it just this once.

She had also made the attempt to learn to rollerblade; it seemed to be one of the 'things' to do in California and Steffi didn't want to come across as some kind of freak. She already had felt out of place with being pale and her Northeast summer wear, but at least Brian was making the transition–albeit temporary–a little easier for her.

They had also gone to a few clubs and browsed several of the shops, Steffi picking up some things for herself as well as a couple of gifts for Dallas. In between, they both instant messaged Dallas practically every evening, one night even going on Brian's webcam.

"Is Steffi really doing okay out there?" Dallas asked one evening.

"Well, the first couple of days she seemed pretty anxious, but once I helped her adjust to things, she's been great," Brian reassured him. "It's seventy one degrees and bright sunshine here, by the way."

"Oh sure, rub it in, Brian," Dallas laughed, looking out his own window at the snow falling and the current temperature being in the low thirties. "Meanwhile, I'm thinking it was a good thing I got gas for the car and some extra food yesterday, because a snow storm is coming in. I have the furnace on to boot."

"Sucks to be you," Brian joked.

"Very funny, taking into consideration you're from Washington State," Dallas reminded him.

"And born in Virginia," Brian finished.

"Right. So what is on tap for you two lovebirds tomorrow?"

"Steffi wants to go to the mall and needs a pack mule. Anyone else, I wouldn't exactly relish the idea, but with _her_, I am happy to oblige."

"I have a feeling both my Visa and camera have been getting a workout," Dallas replied with a chuckle.

"Yeah, well, it's not going to be a big romantic trip or anything since Paul's fat ass will be going with us. He's out in LA now, didn't I tell you?"

"I think you did mention it."

"He's kept his place in Austin too. Anyway, after the shopping trip, there's this Mexican food joint the wants us to check out, so if Steffi comes home near death with her guts burned out, it's no fault of mine. Send the hospital bill to _Paul_ instead."

"I wouldn't think so," Dallas laughed. "I've seen smoke practically coming out of _your_ ears just from a little Tabasco sauce."

"Oh gee, Dallas, now you're getting just like Paul. I think guys like you two enjoy torturing me."

"No, I don't think I'd spike your macaroni with Cajun spices," Dallas responded. "Where is Stef now?"

"She met a couple of girls who are still trying to teach her the rollerblade thing," Brian replied. "She'll probably be back in a bit, hopefully not bruised and battered. I don't want people to think I've been using her for wrestling practice."

"As if you would!" Dallas howled. "All someone has to do is look at Stef the wrong way and you're about to go into kill mode on _them."_

"Damn straight," Brian affirmed. "No one messes with my women."

"Oh, she's 'your woman' now?" Dallas teased, already having an indication of the answer.

"She has been for awhile, where have _you _been?"

"I kind of had an idea that would be the answer the way you two act around one another."

"Frankly, I kind of had the idea of 'capturing' her from the day you introduced us."

"Wow. I learn something new every day. I will admit being around you influenced Steffi to step outside of her own world, so to speak. Thanks for that, by the way."

"Hey, always a pleasure, you old dog," Brian said. "I think I just heard her come upstairs so I'm going to shove off for now. Maybe we can do a cam appearance tonight."

"I'd like that," Dallas answered. "Don't do anything I wouldn't do in the meantime."

.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

A few days after Steffi had returned from her trip to Venice, she had a sparkle in her eye like Dallas had never seen before as they had gone through all the pictures she had taken and the things she had brought back for both of them, Steffi chattering and signing nonstop the entire time.

In the last six months or so, she had gone from being almost afraid to step outside what she had known for years, and now Steffi was eager to try new things. Everything to wearing her hair down recently up to the trip to Venice had just been part of it all.

As she had gone through her bag of new items, one thing had caught Dallas' eye. He pulled out the white leather garment, holding it up.

"Steffi, what on earth……?" Dallas began.

She lit up. "It's just like Bri's!"

Seeing the look on Dallas' face as he examined the jacket, Steffi shook her head and added, "It's a replica of his real one. He had it made for me before I went to Venice. It was a surprise. You like it?"

"It's……._interesting," _he replied.

"I'm going to put it on for the next show we go to," Steffi announced happily. "I'll probably hang it up in a garment bag until then. I don't want it ruined."

"I'm sure you will treasure that always," Dallas said, smiling to himself, dipping into the bag to pull out something else.

"Stef?" he asked, showing her a shirt he'd never seen before. "Now what is this?"

"His old stuff I wore to bed," she giggled, grabbing it and taking a deep sniff. "It smells like him. I'm never going to wash it."

"Good grief, lady," Dallas shook his head. "You're almost like a schoolgirl."

Steffi said nothing, only giving a big smile in response before she turned to put things away.

Dallas watched her, smiling. Brian had been the first guy in Steffi's entire life that had paid any sort of attention to her, and the effect had been a positive one. Dallas knew then he had made the right decision by taking her to that first show on that fateful night.

Yes, Bri was definitely good for her, in more ways than one.

_Meanwhile:_

"Dude, since when do you wear women's T shirts?" Paul yelled out, holding up a shirt he'd presumed Steffi left behind.

"What'd you do?" Brian said, an annoyed look on his face. "Go through my shit again?"

"Was just wondering. Besides, you jacked my iPod the other day."

"Oh yeah, I should have known that was yours with all the gay music that was on it. It's on the desk beside my laptop. Now will you quit digging in my stuff?"

"Okay, okay. So seriously, you wearing chicks' clothes now?"

"Very fucking funny. No, that's Stef's. She probably forgot it when she packed to go home. It smells like her perfume too," he added. "I think I'll hang on to it and not wash it at all."

"Jesus, you are one sick freak, Spanky. I'd hate to see what you'd done if she'd left _panties _behind."

"Fucking Christ, Paul, can you get any more gross? As if you haven't done goofy shit over a girl. I could write a book about just your stupidity with women alone."

"Yeah, yeah. So hey, while we're on Steffi, did she like the jacket?"

Brian grinned. "She dug it big time. You'd think I handed over a million dollar check the way she acted."

"You should give women crazy jackets instead of diamonds. You'll save big bucks that way."

Brian gave him a playful smack on the head. "Smart ass. The only woman I'm caring about these days is Steffi, and may I add she doesn't cost me very much."

Paul gave him a wide grin. "In all seriousness, good for you, man. God knows you deserve some happiness. She's a good egg and any chick that makes my best friend happy gets the Londonator's seal of approval."

Brian patted his shoulder. "Good Mexican slave boy. I knew you'd come around and see things my way sooner or later."

.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

Dallas wasn't sure about the idea at first, but after that first fateful trip to Venice, Steffi had found herself wanting to go back. She had even suggested at one point that they move there.

"Are you really sure about this, Stef?" Dallas wondered. "You've lived here all of your life. Visiting somewhere and actually living there would be two different things."

Steffi shook her head. "Dallas, I'm nearly deaf, not stupid. Of course I know that."

"You can't make snow angels in Venice," he added teasingly.

"No, but I can make _sand_ ones," she answered, laughing. "Dallas, you should see the beach! Brian wants to have a bonfire there the next time I go out."

"Beach bonfire? Wow, that sounds romantic."

"Not exactly with other people around," Steffi laughed again. "He likes getting groups of people together and having bonfire parties."

Dallas raised an eyebrow. "Fascinating."

"You should come with me next time. Brian says he doesn't see enough of you as it is anyway."

"Let me check my work schedule, but I can't guarantee anything," he said.

"Good. I need to go shopping ."

"For heaven's sake, Stef, what more do you need?"

"Vacation clothes," she nodded. "There's big sales going on now."

"You just bought things before you went to Venice the last time," Dallas pointed out.

"But Brian already saw _those!" _Steffie replied in protest. "Besides, there's going to be one of his shows in Hollywood, and I need something to go with the jacket. Oh, I need my hair trimmed too."

"Good God, you're going to blow a fortune."

"Not really. I'm not planning to get a lot," Steffi shrugged.

Dallas caved. "All right, I don't think this time will hurt, especially if it makes you happy. We'll go by your favorite store first."

She smiled widely. "I was hoping you'd say that. I want to find some pants that would look good with the jacket." She then pulled on a pair of boots and then grabbed her purse."Let's go! I can use one of my gift cards there!"

Dallas shook his head and laughed. Who would have thought this Steffi was inside all along of the one he had known so long?

_Meanwhile:_

"Let's see, long matches, beer, hot dogs, marshmallows, Hershey bars, graham crackers, ears of corn, buns, soda, condiments," Brian said, counting off the list of things on his fingers. "Oh yeah, I have to find some decent wood too."

"What the hell are you doing?" Paul asked.

"Steffi's coming out and I want her to experience her first beach bonfire."

"Oh God," Paul groaned. "Not again."

"Stay away from the ocean and you won't get nailed by a jellyfish again, you dumbass redneck," Brian said.

"I am very proud to be a southern boy." Paul straightened himself up and gave a smug look.

"Yeah, setting your pants leg on fire and getting bit by a jellyfish. You're southern all right."

"Face it, you enjoyed my misery, especially when you and seven other people _pissed _on my leg."

"Piss is the best thing for a jellyfish sting," Brian countered.

"And it was _beer piss, _which fucking stank. I had to scrub myself practically raw the next day to get the smell off of me. Meanwhile, the eight of you were laughing like hyenas at my expense. What a great friend you are."

"I could have left you to suffer, but lucky for you, I'm a compassionate dude. Besides, we were drunk."

"And you're planning another one of these parties. Jesus Christ."

"Come on, Paul, it's going to be fun. Just stay away from the jellyfish."

"Did you by any chance tell Steffi about all of this?"

"Of course I did, and if you try anything stupid or something happens to her because you were being an asshole, I will have your balls."

"Don't worry, Spanky, I won't do anything that would embarrass you in front of your little girlfriend."

"Good boy. And cut the 'Spanky' bullshit. I already have Stef asking enough questions about that."

"You didn't tell her the story? How long have you been seeing this chick?" Paul stared at him in wonder.

"Long enough to know that some things are better off for some people _not _knowing."

"Are you taking her to the Hollywood show?" Paul wondered.

"Of course I am, dumbass. You honestly didn't think I was going to keep her sitting at home while I did my thing, did you? That would make me a pretty bad host."

"Ah yes, with the booty call to follow."

Brian smacked Paul on the head and glared at him. "It is NOT a booty call," he replied. "Unless you've forgotten, I happen to consider Stef far more than that, and it always doesn't end with sex. Try thinking with the right head for once, will you?"

"Okay, geez, you don't have to get all crazy." Paul took a deep sniff and walked toward the appealing odor coming from the kitchen. "What's cooking?"

"Spaghetti," Brian said happily. "I'm trying out the recipe Steffi gave me. Do one thing to it and I will kill your ass."

"Who said I'd do anything?"

"Cajun spices in the rice, Paul," Brian replied sternly. "Remember that episode?"

"Oh yeah, when you took one bite and then were gasping for water while smoke curled out of your ears. Good times."

"I'm glad you enjoyed that. Now get your round ass back in here and leave my dinner alone. You want spicy, you can spice up your own bowl when the shit's done."

.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

A few days after the shopping trip, it had been one of those rare times when Dallas had gotten time to spend with his former wife. Steffi was at her job at the workshop and he and Diane had just finished cleaning up lunch when the phone rang.

"Wonder who's calling this time of the day?" Dallas asked out loud before going to answer it.

He spent several minutes on the call, shaking his head, making quizzical faces, and asking an occasional question before hanging up.

"You are not going to believe this," he finally said .

"What happened? Is Steffi okay?" Diane wondered.

"As far as I know, but that wasn't about her," Dallas replied. "It was about her friend Brian. Turns out he and another buddy got a trip to jail."

"Oh my God! How did that happen?"

"Of all the craziest things. He and Paul were caught by hotel security racing down the hallway _stark naked._"

Diane broke out laughing. "Tell me you're joking."

"I wish I was," he sighed, also trying not to laugh. "But unfortunately that isn't the case."

"I'd hate to see how poor Steffi will react when she hears this."

"She probably knows as we speak; this incident is up on the sites already. That was another friend of mine and Brian's on the phone letting me know."

Just then, the TTY phone beeped, interrupting them. It was Steffi.

"Dallas," she said anxiously. "Is it true about Brian? Is he really in jail?"

"Well, he was," he reassured her. "But he was able to get out, at least that was what another friend just told me before you called."

"Why would he run down a hotel hall naked? That's just _wrong_."

"Boys will be boys, kiddo," Dallas said. "People tend to do strange things when they're on the road. He'll probably just get off paying a fine and going on to the next city. It's really nothing to be concerned about. He's a big boy; things will be okay."

"I hope he doesn't get in any more trouble before you and I go to Venice," she said. "Or I'm going to have to have a word or two with him."

"Well, I certainly hope _someone_ would," Dallas chuckled. "But let's be glad it wasn't something far worse than a streaking episode in a hotel hallway."

"Yeah," Steffi answered. "I think I'm going to message him later tonight anyway. We can't really have websites gossiping about stuff. The marijuana test stories were bad enough, and I don't care what anyone says, I believe him on that issue."

Dallas was taken aback. "You _knew_ about that? The failed tests and multiple fines?"

"I have for awhile, Dallas. Brian told me. He and I have no secrets from each other. I trust him just like I trust you. Isn't that what being part of someone's life is about?"

"I reckon so," Dallas responded, wondering just _how much_ Brian had revealed about himself to her over the last several months.

Whatever the case, at least Steffi wasn't judging him like so many others had. Dallas knew his friend could use all the supportive people he could get, especially Brian being a kind hearted guy in a heel role.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

"What were you thinking?" Steffi asked when she and Brian messaged back and forth that night.

"Paul made a dare and bet that I wouldn't act on it. So I decided to call his bluff and we started going down the hall when one of the hotel goons came out of the elevator and busted us."

"I heard you went to jail," she replied with concern.

"That's how much sites fuck up their information and nobody should believe most of the bullshit on them," Brian said. "We were held in a cell at the police station for a couple of hours and then sent home with a fine. I just paid the thing and chalked it up to experience."

"Thank goodness. I wouldn't like the thought of you being locked up."

"Hey, wouldn't be the first time I was in trouble for something. May I also add we've been banned from that particular hotel in the future."

"Oh, no."

"Don't worry, we were able to get a room somewhere else on short notice. We're just keeping our clothes on here."

He then paused for a moment before asking, "So you ready to head back West in a few days?"

"As always. I can't wait to see you again," Steffi replied.

"Same here. I got all the shit for a bonfire while you and Dallas are here."

"You're going to have one?" She became excited. Her first beach party _was_ going to happen.

"I was thinking after the show in Hollywood. No use getting a room when I'm going to be so close to home anyway. It will be great, getting together with everyone and living it up before we see the sun rise."

"Oh wow……"

"Sorry, I guess I forgot to tell you that part."

"It sounds wonderful," Steffi answered.

"I have another surprise for you on show night too."

"What is it?"

"If I told you, it wouldn't be much of a surprise, would it. Just make sure Dallas brings the camera so you can get some nice pictures. I'll leave it at that."

"Oh gee, now I'm going to be going around wondering what you have up your sleeve!" Steffi began to laugh

"Don't worry," Brian said. "I promise I won't race around naked down any more hallways while you and Dallas are here."

The coming days were going to be exciting for sure. Steffi couldn't wait to get to Venice to see what her next surprise would be. In the meanwhile, she was going to fill in Dallas and make sure he did indeed pack the camera. She didn't want to miss a moment!

.


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

"Did he say what was in store?" Dallas asked the next day. "I already know about the whole bonfire thing, but what else did he say?"

"Nothing, except that it wouldn't be a surprise if he told me," Steffi shrugged. "By the way, you were right, he just had to pay a fine for the running naked down the hall thing."

"I figured it wouldn't be anything of much concern," he nodded. "Still, I have to wonder what Brian's dreamed up for us this time, especially _you."_

"All I know it has something to do with the night of the show," she replied.

Dallas thought a moment. "Interesting. For some reason, I am a little nervous as to what he actually has in store."

"Dallas!" Steffi began to laugh. "He's our friend. Surely it can't be anything bad, especially when Brian told me to make sure we brought your camera."

"Camera? What, he wants to capture the bonfire thing?"

"That and his show apparently," Steffi nodded. "Hey! Do you think he's up for some championship or something? Maybe that's it!"

"If that were the case, Stef, it would be leaked all over the sites or someone would have some knowledge of such a thing. That isn't something that's kept a secret for very long."

Steffi thought a moment. "Yeah, good point. Still, this is going to bug me until we get there."

Dallas had to smile. "You and I both, love, but we have to admit it just makes it much more exciting to look forward to this trip."

_Meanwhile:_

"How the hell did you pull that off?" Paul asked. "Hell, when I was in the company, I could have gone into the top brass' office and done the Mexican Hat Dance baby ass naked and still wouldn't scored those kind of passes and tickets."

"Yeah, well, if you hadn't been an asshole backstage sometimes, you may have gotten further than you did, holmes. See, with me, I travel alone, go in there, do my job without bitching, don't grin inappropriately on camera, and I try to be half decent to everyone, including the bosses. And I don't date anyone I work with. That's asking for disaster, as you know."

"Now you tell me. Hindsight's 20/20 now, though."

"It was all common sense, dude. I don't think I needed to tell you anything. But on to happier things, Stef's going to pass out when she finds out she and Dallas are going to be in the front row _and_ get access backstage."

"Jesus, what's next, getting her a rock from Tiffany's?" Paul asked. "You've never gone out for a chick like this before, at least as far as I can remember."

"Perhaps," Brian said nonchalantly. "Did you get the stuff for the bonfire?"

"Yeah, but I'm lighting it this time. It's common knowledge not to let you near anything that involves anything hot or flaming."

"This coming from a dude who set his own pants leg on fire when he got too close to the last one and danced around like six hundred spiders were in his pants," Brian retorted.

"You nearly sliced your finger off chopping a cucumber."

"Right, only you'd remember that considering how much you dig blood. Now can we quit the nitpicking of each other and get things ready? Stef and Dallas will be here in a couple of days and I don't want my house a fucking disaster when they do show up."

"Who's picking them up?" Paul inquired.

"I am. It would take you all day to get to the airport with your grandma-style driving. I also need to go back out again later."

"What for? You already got the important shit done."

"Yeah, but I have to make sure there's enough food, soap and other things in the house for them. Comforts of home, you could say, plus I want the spare room set up for Stef just right. I have a feeling after this visit, she'll be around more often in the future."

"Right," Paul nodded. "You _are _indeed too far gone."

.


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16**

"Dallas," Steffi giggled, giving him a gentle poke once they had gotten off the plane a few days when they arrived in California a few days later, "you can take off your coat. People are looking."

Dallas looked down, realizing he was still wearing his winter jacket. "Oh, right." He gave a slight laugh. "I guess I look a bit odd in the sweater too."

"As do I in mine, but I don't care." Steffi grinned up at him.

"What time did Bri say he was meeting us?"

"Three thirty. That's in about a few minutes."

"Ahh, I see you remembered to change your watch this time to the right time zone."

Steffi smiled again. "Of course. I learned after the first time. All this stuff can be confusing, though."

"**DAAAAAALLLLLLAAAAASSSSS!" **a loud bellow came across the terminal. The two of them turned around toward the sound, recognizing Brian right off.

"Good God," Dallas said to Steffi. "How can a guy that small have such big mouth?"

"It's an unwritten rule with us short people," Steffi joked as her eyes lit up at the sight of Brian when he approached them. "We have to be loud so you'll look down and hear us."

Hugs and handshakes were exchanged before Brian helped Dallas grab their luggage and loaded it into the trunk of Brian's car before they drove up to Venice. Of all the times they had visited, Dallas and Steffi had never seen where he had lived, and this was going to be a new experience.

"So fill us in on the taping tomorrow night," Dallas prodded from the back seat.

"Can't tell you much, man," Brian replied. "I could get my ass in trouble. Company policies and all that happy bullshit."

"Not even a nibble?" Dallas pressed.

"Just the name of the venue, what time the show starts and where your seats are going to be. If it helps, a lot of us don't even know what is going to happen until practically the last minute. I just have to show my happy ass up and be dressed, ready to go."

"You're evil," Dallas laughed.

"Yeah, so I'm told all the time. Did you guys eat yet?"

"Not since breakfast," Dallas answered.

"Good, no better time to take you two to lunch."

"Not a bad idea, but at least let me pick up the tab this time."

"Nothing doing, you old dog. You two are my guests, you'll be treated as such. There's also everything set up at the house after we get there, so you'll be nice and comfy the next couple of days."

_That night:_

Dallas and Steffi had arrived at the arena and were about to present their tickets to enter when a security person recognized them and headed in their direction.

"Could you folks wait here, please?" he asked.

Steffi looked at Dallas, anxious. "Did we do something wrong?"

"I don't think so, honey, but let's just do as they say and see where this goes. Surely whatever it is, it can't be too serious."

A well-dressed woman then came toward them, smiling. "Mr. Collins and Miss Devlin?"

Both he and Steffi stared at each other, wondering how this woman knew them. Dallas then nodded. "That's us."

"Please come with me. I have instructions from one of the talent to move you to another section."

Dallas began to laugh, relieved. "I should have guessed Brian was in some way behind this."

They followed the woman inside to the seating area, Steffi almost breathless when they were guided into the front row on the camera side.

"I never had good seats like this _anywhere_ before!" Steffi said, excited as she and Dallas sat down.

The woman also handed them two envelopes. "Enjoy the show," she said before walking away.

Steffi stared at hers curiously before opening it. "Dallas, is this….."

He nodded. "Looks like a backstage pass, Stef. Brian must have really gone all out."

"He certainly did," she replied, cheeks flushing.

Steffi then spotted a camera. "Are we going to be on TV?" Her eyes grew wide.

"Possibly," Dallas nodded.

The show had begun a short time later with something called a "dark match" before the actual taping had gotten underway. There had been four other matches and two promos prior to Brian due to come out.

He had warned them in the past that they wouldn't be acknowledged because he had to "stay in character." They had understood, but it would indeed be fascinating to see him in action this time much more up close than in the past.

The match had been Brian and Big Zeke vs. The Colons for the WWE Tag Team Titles. Zeke had dominated Primo, with Brian offering some offense as well. Carlito took control of Brian for awhile with Steffi trying to yell on top of her lungs, oblivious to the strange looks around her.

Zeke came back in and cleaned a little house before Brian was tagged in, getting some offense on Primo, until they were both on the ground. Carlito was then tagged in with the hot tag, with Brian still the legal man. Zeke got involved before being knocked out of the ring by Primo and Carlito.

Carlito had been standing near the ropes when Brian rushed him. Primo was knocked off the apron as Brian went for the rollup on Carlito. Brian was about to go for his finisher when Carlito turned him around and hits a vicious backstabber for the win. The champions had retained their titles.

"Dammit!" Steffi said, disappointed.

"Stef, take it easy," Dallas chuckled. "They'll get another shot, and hey, we're supposed to _boo_ the heels."

"You're not much of a friend," she said, giving him a look.

"I'm sure he'll understand when we go to the bonfire party later." Dallas then turned to a younger guy beside him. "She's a big fan," he explained.

The man nodded, grinning. "Sometimes we like the less popular ones," he replied. "Perfectly all right." He smiled over at Steffi. "You just keep cheering for who you want, little lady."

Steffi nodded and smiled back, grateful to find someone that understood exactly where she was coming from.

.


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17**

After the show, Dallas and Steffi had been backstage for awhile, meeting with some of the other talent. Steffi's earlier disappointment in Brian's losing his match had been long gone and she was happily taking pictures.

It was a beautiful night, and from there they had headed back to Venice with Brian, having animated chatter all the way there. When they had arrived, the bonfire was already going on the beach and some other guests had arrived.

"Oh no he didn't!" Brian cried, spying the fire. "Dammit, I told that dumbass Paul to wait until we got here. Jesus."

"Hey, champ, get out of the heel role already; this is not the time to be going down and drawing blood," Dallas patted his shoulder.

"He better have not cooked anything yet or I _will_ cut his balls off and feed them to my cats," Brian shook his head. "Well, let's go see what trouble he's already gotten into."

They headed down to the beach, where Paul spied them, giving his ever-present goofy grin. "About time you weirdos arrived," he joked.

"Nice to see you can take directions, numbnuts," Brian replied, giving him a smack on the head. "I told you not to start the fire until everyone got here."

"Why so we can see you burn the city down?"

"Keep it up and not only will I make sure you get another jellyfish sting, I'll gather _twelve _people this time to piss on you, provided they had plenty of beer first."

Paul put up his hands in surrender. "Okay, okay, you win."

"You didn't by any chance cook anything, did you?" Brian pressed.

"Not yet. I was waiting for the rest to show up."

"Good slave boy."

"Dude, I am not your slave boy."

"Just go get the hot dogs and shit," Brian sighed. "I need a beer."

While Dallas had gone to mingle with the other guests, Steffi had made her way farther away from the fire, sipping a soda and watching the action from afar. Even with her new adventures, she tended to be a little uneasy in a crowd, and had found a quiet spot to observe everything happening around her.

"Hi," Brian said, flopping down beside her a short time later. "What are you doing way up here?"

"Watching the world go by," Steffi nodded, glad to see him. "How about you?"

"Paul's cooking stuff and ignoring me. I guess I shouldn't have jumped his ass earlier about getting the fire started."

Steffi gestured toward a crowd of girls around Paul. "Looks like he's busy anyway."

"Ahh, I figured as such. If he burns that food with his being stupid around those chicks, I'll kill his ass. Just as well that bunch doesn't bother me anyway; I'm usually kept around for the entertainment of making fun of me or talking about sex."

"Why would they make fun of you?" Steffi looked perplexed.

"I guess some people find humor in making fun of us short guys. I guess the only way a dude can be worthy if he's tall, dark and toned like dipshit down there. Never mind that _I _still have a job and he doesn't."

"Well, that's just cruel and juvenile," she said defiantly. "You're a very talented and kind person, and if they don't like it, phooey on them!"

"Yeah, I left high school already. I would _not_ like to go back to it."

Steffi nodded. "Me neither. I'd rather hang out with mature people with a brain and don't judge me because of my hearing problem anyway."

Brian perked up. "Oh yeah? And who would that be?"

"Gee, I wouldn't know," she teased.

"Me either. I hear he's a real good-looking fellow."

"Oh yes."

"Like about so tall," Brian pointed to himself, "blondish-brown curly hair about ye long, likes to read…."

"Sounds _very_ familiar," Steffi giggled, enjoying the exchange.

"Yeah, I know that guy. What a dick. But he's a dick that likes bigger girls and could care less if they have full hearing or not. Maybe that's why you two get along so well."

She laughed louder. "You think?"

"Nah, I'm just prejudiced against skinny bitches that think they're all that." He then went in for the kill, kissing her before a loud voice cut in.

"Hey, lovebirds!" Dallas yelled from a distance, interrupting them. "Food's on!"

"About time, I'm starving," Brian said, getting up and pulling Steffi to her feet.

They made their way down to join the others, engaging in the feast of hot dogs, the steak Paul had brought to surprise them, potato and macaroni salads, beer, soda, chips, salsa, and other delicacies.

It was all Paul could do to keep a straight face as his best friend headed back to the buffet to fill up on what he missed in the first round.

"Uh, Bri?" Dallas asked as Brian was about to dig into the macaroni salad. "I don't think I'd try that if I were you."

"Dallas, man, shut up!" Paul hissed. "I want to see his reaction."

"Why not?" Brian grinned, scooping up a heap. "It looks pretty good."

Dallas sighed, shaking his head and turned back to Paul. "You better hope he lets you live after this."

Brian dug into his steak and other things on his plate, laughing and chatting to everyone before he'd taken a bite of the macaroni salad. Within minutes, he was flushed and began to cough.

"Are you all right?" Steffi asked, concerned, quickly handing him some water.

"Jesus, I can see why Dallas didn't want me to take this shit! It's spicy as hell!"

Paul lay back on the sand, howling with laughter.

Brian then jumped up, glaring in Paul's direction. "YOU! Damn you, Paul, you stupid fucking beaner! Keep your hot tamale hot sauce shit out of my food! We are in _America; _this is not your country, holmes!"

His rant only made Paul laugh harder, heading toward hysterics.

"I will have you fucking killed!" Brian continued to rant. "I have Mafia friends! About everyone I know is connected! Did you forget I'm half Italian, homie? We have Mafia people all over! I will have you sleep with the fishes! No! I have a better idea! I'll have Zeke chop you up and make Mexican food out of you! Big boy like that gets hungry pretty easy, you know."

Paul stopped mid-laughter at the mention of Zeke's name. "Can I sleep with the fishes instead?"

"You're lucky Dallas and I got that stuff before anyone else did. I'll let you live this time, but pull that shit again and I _will_ kill you. Or…I have a better idea."

Paul was wide eyed. "What?"

"I'll chain you to my bed and make you my sex toy for all of eternity."

"Eww, dude, come on, cut the gay references. There's company present."

Steffi wrinkled her nose. "Ugh," she agreed.

"See, even your girl agrees with me," Paul said.

"Don't worry, Stef, I was only kidding," Brian nodded with a knowing grin. "_This time_," he added, turning back to Paul.

Everyone settled around the fire, eating their meals and drinking beverages "I never knew bonfire parties could be so fun," Dallas grinned.

"You should get out here more often," Brian said, gulping down the last of his soda.

Paul let out a loud belch, followed by a satisfied grin. "Sorry."

"What the hell was that?" Brian asked, glaring at him.

Dallas made a face. "Paul, there's ladies present. Jesus, man, you just burped in front of one of them."

"I don't mind," Steffi said.

"Be thankful he didn't _fart," _Brian replied. "Then again, if that happened, good thing we're outside or we all would be dead from the bombs he lays."

"Aw, fuck you, man, shut up!" Paul yelled, giving him a shove.

Brian laughed and shoved him back, the two of them going back and forth for a few minutes before it ended when Steffi held up a bowl.

"Marshmallows," she smiled.

"Good idea," Brian nodded. "At least that's one thing we won't have to worry about Paul lacing with that spice bullshit of his."

With that, they found sticks and began roasting marshmallows in the fire. It had indeed been a happy and memorable night.

.


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18**

"I just wish I knew what I could do to make it up to her," Brian sighed the next day. Cherry may have been released from the company awhile back, but the two of them had remained close friends, and now she was his sounding board.

"Look, honey, it isn't your fault your buddy–" she began.

"_Ex_ buddy," Brian sniffed. "From this day on, Paul can eat shit and die for all I care. He's damn lucky I didn't get Zeke over there to tear up his sorry ass six ways from next Sunday. It's bad enough that lousy drunk had to start shit with _me, _but to drag _Steffi _into it? I'm sorry, but he crossed the fucking line. Even Dallas is disgusted with Paul, and at this point, I can't blame him. Thing is, Steffi probably hates _me_ now too. They left a day early and Dallas told me on the phone awhile ago she never wants to come back again."

"Bri, what exactly happened?" Cherry asked. "All I know that Mel, Mickie, Lilian and I were playing volleyball when we heard a big argument break out between the two of you."

"Being an ass as always, what else?" Brian threw up his hands. "There's one thing about making jokes, and then there is shit that's downright cruel. Not only was dude drunk and lit up some weed on top of that, but then he started making comments about a couple up the beach a way, especially about the girl's size. The blow up began with me telling him as nice as I could to knock it off. The next thing I knew, he lit into me about everything from abandoning him to look out for my own job, that I wasn't fun anymore, all that bullshit. The worst part was then saying it was pretty bad for me to have a near deaf girl for a 'mercy fuck', but I may as well enjoy it because a short, scrawny homeboy like me couldn't do better anyway."

"Oh my God!" she gasped. "That _was_ horrible. Steffi by any chance didn't…."

"No," Brian cut in. "But _Dallas_ did and it was all he could do not to go over and kick Paul's teeth in. Dal's pretty protective of Steffi, always had been. But what she did overhear was the asshole telling me to get lost and 'take my number one freak of nature groupie with me.' Dallas said Stef started to cry, wanted to go back home, and hasn't said a word to anyone since. God, Cherry, how am I going to fix this?"

"By getting through to Steffi somehow and tell her exactly what you told me earlier. Just because he was an ass doesn't mean you feel the same. Look, even a blind person can see you care about her a great deal and you're hurting as much as she is."

"I am," he nodded. "Leave it to that stupid fucking beaner to screw up a good party. He is so not being invited to anything else."

"Don't let his being an asshole get to you. You know what I honestly think?"

"Enlighten me," Brian sighed, "because I'm at a loss here."

"I think deep down, he's jealous of you. The guy got his walking papers from the company while you had title shots and are getting a decent push. It isn't main event status, but you're out there. It's common knowledge that Paul's bitter because he'd been let go. Hey, I was let go too, but do you see _me_ crying in my beer months after the fact about it? No. I took another road and going to college so I can be something. You said it yourself the day I left, Bri. 'Life's too short for bullshit. Be blatant, be honest, be real, live how you want and don't care what anyone thinks.'"

"I'm glad someone took that speech to heart."

"May I also add that you don't need to make up to Steffi about anything, you hear me? I bet she doesn't even know you defended her."

Brian thought a moment. "Wait…..you're right, I don't think she does, at least Dallas didn't mention her knowing it."

Cherry nodded and smiled. "Then I suggest you find a way to get through to the little lady and let her know how you really are. Phone, instant message, through Dallas, telegram, hell, send it by pigeon courier, but she needs to know that you don't exactly share your former friend's sick views."

"Damn, Cherry, you're so smart, you scare the hell out of me. Yeah, I have her TTY and instant message, in fact. I'll give her a shout here in a bit. You're right again, none of what happened last night is my fault."

"Now that's the spirit! As a matter of fact, coming from _this_ woman's perspective, you have more class in your left pinky finger than Paul ever did in his whole body. Seriously, Bri, dump that loser. He's not worth keeping around, especially if he makes Steffi feel so unhappy, and worse, giving you headaches. You're too good for all that."

"Right. Now I have some patching up to do with one Stefanie Devlin. Thanks again for the pep talk, lady." He kissed Cherry on the cheek. "It's good there's people out there I can still count on."

_That afternoon:_

Dallas had been reading the paper and taking time to collect his thoughts after trying to reason with Steffi most of the day. Since they had come home from Venice, she refused to speak, using sign language instead when she _did _communicate. She hadn't even bothered putting in her hearing aids, and even getting her to eat something had been a task for him.

His phone rang, cutting into his thoughts. Checking the number in the phone's window, Dallas grimaced.

_Well look who's calling to grovel, _he thought, seeing Paul's number. _He can take a goddamned hike and go to voice mail._

Dallas placed the phone back on the end table and returned to his paper until it rang again a few minutes later.

He had been about to answer it and rip Paul a new one until he saw the number. From there, his demeanor changed immediately.

"Hey, Bri," Dallas said. "You okay?"

"Yeah, just talked with a good friend of mine and feeling a lot better, man. Is Steffi around?"

"She is, but hasn't said a word to anyone but me since we left. She didn't even come out for lunch and her hearing aids are still in the bathroom."

"Oh God. Dallas, Steffi fucking hates me, doesn't she? She already told you she doesn't want to come back here again."

"I don't know what she's thinking, buddy. I'd like to think that she doesn't, though. You know what? Call back on the TTY phone. I'm going to get her now."

Dallas clicked off, going to Steffi's room where she had been on her laptop journaling. He approached gently, not wanting to startle her. The TTY extension had beeped and Dallas picked it up, asking the operator to hold for a moment.

"Stef," he signed. "Your phone."

"I'm not talking to them," she signed and shook her head firmly. "Never, ever again."

"For _me? _Look, I think there was a misunderstanding and it needs cleared up. You can't go back into your shell and be jaded because one person was an ass. If it helps, I'm not happy about the situation either. Now come on, talk to Bri."

"No."

Dallas sighed. He hated when Steffi got into these moods; they could last anywhere from hours to weeks.

"I'm sorry, Bri," he said when he went back to the phone. "I gave it my best shot, but if it helps, she's on her laptop. Get through to her there on the messenger."

He then hung up and turned back to Steffi. "For what it's worth, Brian stood up for you last night," he signed before leaving the room.

She sat still for a moment, thinking over this new revelation, wondering perhaps if she'd been too hard on the wrong person.

.


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter 19**

Brian sat down with a fresh cup of coffee and opened his laptop, ready to do exactly what Dallas had instructed. Engrossed with logging on, he hadn't paid any attention when his phone rang, answering it without checking the number instead.

"Hey, man," Paul began. "I…."

"Goodbye, asshole," Brian snapped, ready to hang up.

"Spanky, come on, hear me out. I was drunk and—"

"Sucks to be you, doesn't it, dopefuck?. Until you apologize to people, _especially Steffi, _consider my number deleted off your phone as of right now. I'm not baby sitting your ass anymore."

He then hung up abruptly, turning the phone off and tossing it aside, going back to the laptop.

Brian signed into the messenger he and Steffi often used to communicate, and to both his delight and apprehension, saw her signed on. The personal message under her name disturbed him, however:

**HEARING PEOPLE SUCK!!!! THEY WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND.**

"_I_ understand," he typed, messaging Steffi, "at least I want to because you're worth at least that much."

A few moments passed without a response before one came. "Huh?"

Brian's heart skipped a little; it appeared perhaps he _had_ broken through. "Your message under your name. I want to understand."

"Okay…."

"Steffi," he continued. "I'm sorry for the bullshit you and Dallas had to witness last night, but let me make one thing clear right now. Not everyone has the same warped opinions and values like that superficial asshole of an ex-best friend of mine does. Paul's got issues of his own, not to mention an ego the size of the whole state of California. Hell, his swelled head could have its own zip code. But in any case, I don't want you to think I condone that kind of shit, because I _don't_. Frankly, I'm still so pissed off about what he did, I can't even see straight, not to mention I just smoked a whole pack of cigarettes in an hour today and did a blunt. Don't tell Dallas about the blunt part, though."

"I won't."

She was still unusually quiet. "Stef, you okay?" he asked.

"Yeah. I'm not going out much anymore, though."

"_Why? _Dallas said you were doing great and you were so happy."

"Well, yeah, but it doesn't change the fact I'm still a freak that won't fit into a hearing world."

"Bullshit," Brian typed. "Listen to me right now, lady, because for one, you are not a freak, at least in my part of the world anyway. You can't help how you are and are _perfect _the way you are. People don't like you that way? Well, fuck them too!"

"You honestly think that?"

"You bet your sweet round ass I do. It's just me not being able to change the fact I'm short. I'm short, so the fuck what? You've got a hearing limitation, big deal. That doesn't change that Steffi Devlin is an awesome person."

She had typed a laughing emoticon. "You aren't _that_ short. Gee!"

"And you're good for my morale. But really, Stef, don't let one asshole stand in your way of improving yourself. Promise me that."

"Okay, I will."

"You'll come back out to visit sometime?" he pressed.

A slight paused before Steffi typed, "For _you? _Yes. Everyone else can kiss my butt, especially that arrogant pig!"

Brian was elated. "You won't have to worry about that 'arrogant pig' anymore. I've made it clear until he makes things right with you and Dallas, I want nothing more to do with him. It's time he grew up, got his shit together, and takes responsibility for his actions. I refuse to associate with an overgrown, spoiled brat who thinks the world revolves around him. Fuck that."

"So it _is _really true!"

"What?"

"Dallas said you stood up for me last night."

"Damn straight I did, and for what it's worth, so did a few other people. Let's just say there's a We Despise Paul club in motion today with yours truly as president and leave it at that."

"Well, thank you. I guess not everything in the hearing world sucks as much as I thought."

"Now that's my girl. You can also erase that stupid message under your name now and stop referring to things as 'the hearing world.' You're as part of this world as much as Dallas and I are, if not even more."

"Okay!!!!!!!" Her response had come across as optimistic and cheerful. "You're the best guy ever! Thank you, Brian."

_God damn, _he thought, grinning, _I still have the touch. Pretty good for a short, funny looking dude._

_A short time later:_

Dallas was getting dinner when he felt a tap on his shoulder. He turned around, seeing Steffi standing there, smiling.

"What's for dinner? I'm hungry."

"Aha, so you've decided to talk now?" He was pleased.

Steffi nodded. "Someone kind of set me right on things."

"Hmm, and this someone wouldn't happen to be a five foot seven, blue eyed blond, would they?"

"Maybe," she teased.

"I'm glad things got worked out, love."

"Me too. What's for dinner?"

"Amazingly enough, I thought to make your favorite cheese and bacon sandwiches with fries. It was originally intended to be another bribe to get you out of that room, but seeing how things are now, that won't be necessary."

"Grease city!" she said cheerfully. "Dallas, you're the best!"

"Why do I get the feeling I'm the _second _guy you said that to today?"

"It doesn't mean I love you any less," Steffi said. "Want to see something I printed out?"

"Sure, the fries won't be done for a few minutes anyway. What is it?"

"This poem Brian wrote."

As Dallas began to read it, Steffi explained further, "It isn't for me, by the way, just a very close friend he's trying to put some sense into."

_I'm sick of your lies.  
I'm sick of having to fake a smile.  
I'm sick of wondering if you'll ever stay clean for more than just a little while.  
I'm sick of being unappreciated, and after every talk, feeling defeated.  
I'm sick of wondering when your recovery will be completed.  
I'm sick of imagining life back to you and me.  
I'm sick of wondering if that's a dream or could one day BE reality.  
I'm sick of your jokes, I'm sick of the betrayal.  
I'm sick of you thinking you're some King I should hail.  
I'm sick of the disrespect.  
I'm sick of the neglect.  
But most of all, I'm sick of feeling like I'm losing you,  
Without realizing, you weren't mine to lose in the first place._

"Wow," Dallas finally said. "This is some deep stuff."

"Yeah, pretty good for someone that never saw the inside of a college, huh?"

"I would have to agree. Stef, are you changing your mind about college?"

"No, why?"

"I was just wondering with that last statement you made."

"I think I'm going to do community college or a vocational school first to see how I like it," she stated. "No use wasting money for something if I'm not going to like it or be able to handle it."

"I'm guessing something else your blond guru taught you, huh?"

Steffi smiled again. "You could say that."

"Stick with him," Dallas said, going to get the fries out of the cooker. "He could teach you a lot more about going places in this world than I ever could."

.


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter 20**

_Two weeks later:_

"Bri, what the hell are you…." Dallas began before he was cut off when Brian shushed him and nodded toward Steffi, who was engrossed in school catalogs.

"I want to surprise her," he said. "Work with me on this, Dallas."

"You know you can't sneak up on someone like her. Brian, you'll scare the shit out of Steffi."

"Hey, she's already seen me first thing in the morning. Nothing can be scarier than _that _sight, trust me."

"All right, but if you end up missing some teeth from her being startled, don't say I didn't warn you."

"I'll be a good boy. Besides, I brought another surprise for you two anyway."

Brian sauntered over to Steffi, gently putting his hands over her eyes. She jumped, letting out a loud screech.

"I told you!" Dallas said, shaking his head.

"Stef, it's me! Don't go on the kill!" Brian cried, facing her.

She let out another cry, this one of delight, and hugged him. "What are you doing here?"

"House shows got canceled because of shitty weather in the Midwest, so I had all the time in the world to come and visit two of my favorite people, not to mention clear up some unfinished business."

"What unfinished business?" Steffi wondered. Dallas had a confused look as well.

"Stay here a minute; I'll be right back."

Dallas and Steffi looked at each other, wondering what Brian could be up to when they hear him outside yell, "Hey, doofus! You can come in now!"

A moment passed and he returned, Paul slinking behind him.

"Oh, it's _you," _Dallas said coldly.

Steffi glared at Paul before flipping him off and going back to sit down. "Tell him to get lost," she signed to Dallas and Brian.

"Aw, come on, you two; I know I was a dick a couple of weeks ago, but I promised Bri I'd make things right. Please?"

"Seriously, guys, hear him out. I was going to have him call you, but it was his idea to come and straighten things out personally," Brian added. "I figured if I could forgive him for being an asshole, he deserved a second chance with you two."

Dallas thawed a little. "It was really your idea?"

Paul nodded, still looking sheepish.

"In that case, perhaps we _should_ listen," Dallas nodded. "Carry on."

"Now, slave boy," Brian cut in, "show them what you learned in the last two weeks as part of your punishment."

Steffi began to laugh. "_Punishment?"_

"Yeah. I told him he had a choice of either me prison raping him or learning a new trick. Show them, _senor."_

"_You learned sign language?" _Dallas asked, clearly impressed, when Paul issued an apology via his newest skill.

"_Si, senor," _Paul nodded, "but I'm not done yet."

"Damn right you're not," Brian clarified.

"Before I do, let me make it clear that even though Spanky put me under duress with the threat of prison rape, I needed to do this part anyway."

With that, Paul kneeled in front of Steffi, looking up with puppy dog eyes. "Forgive me?" he signed. "Pleaaaaaaaaaaaaase?"

She couldn't help but laugh again, tussling his hair and nodding. "Of course I do!"

"Never thought you'd see this, huh, Dallas?" Brian grinned wickedly. "Tough guy here kneeling before a woman and groveling for forgiveness. I fucking love it."

"Bite me, Spanky," Paul joked, getting up. "If it meant being poked in the corneas with hot forks or the thought of you raping me, I'd take the fork punishment. Am I done now?"

"Yes. Good slave boy."

"I think this is worth me treating everyone to dinner tonight," Dallas grinned widely. "Call it an official acceptance of Paul's peace offering, if you will. I'll get us some pizzas."

"Works for me," Paul grinned back.

"You enjoy yourselves," Brian laughed, grabbing Steffi and picking her up. "I'm taking your ward to Venice. We'll be back when we're a hundred years old."

"Like hell you will," Dallas laughed before placing the order.

"PUT ME DOWN!" Steffi screeched, laughing and smacking his behind.

"Come on, Stef," Paul grinned. "Do you know how many chicks out there would _kill_ to have Spanky take them back to his cave?"

"Dude," Brian said, giving a cheesy grin. "Don't help, okay?"

Steffi grabbed a fist full of hair.

"Fucking hell!" Brian howled. "Jesus, Stef, I don't want to be bald before I'm a hundred!"

"Put me down or you won't live to see _thirty!" _she repeated.

"Looks like you roped yourself a feisty one, Spank," Paul laughed, helping Steffi down. "There you go, _senorita. _We got the short caveman to put you down."

Brian rubbed his head. "You know that prison rape threat still stands, right?"

"Did I hurt you?" Steffi asked, concerned. "I didn't mean to pull that hard. I know you were just fooling around."

"Nah," Brian grinned. "I've hurt a lot worse than some hair pulling, _me amano."_

"Be thankful they weren't his _wjavos," _Paul nodded. "Or he would have really been screaming."

"Keep it up and I'll whack yours off and hang them over my fireplace."

Paul shuddered. "I think I'll be quiet now while I'm ahead."

"Food should be here in half an hour, " Dallas announced, hanging up the phone.

"So until then, how about we watch a movie?" Brian suggested. Steffi nodded eagerly in agreement.

"Don't order any porn," Dallas warned playfully. "There's a lady in the house."

"Dallas, dude, you if anyone knows that I am a total gentleman," Brian said, shuffling through DVDs

Paul let go a cough, trying not to laugh.

"Prison rape, Paul," Brian threatened playfully before putting in a movie.

Steffi sat down next to Brian on the sofa and placed her head on his shoulder. He smiled wide seeing her cuddled next to him and they began giggling and using sign language back and forth. They were so engrossed in it that they were oblivious to Dallas and Paul staring at them quizzically.

Dallas glanced at Paul. "Did they forget that we _both _now understand sign language?" he asked.

"Spanky always was in his own world," Paul replied. "Hey lovebirds! People in the room. We don't want to be sick before the food gets here."

"Gee, Paul, if I'd known you were jealous, I'd raped you before we got here," Brian laughed.

Paul threw a cushion at him. "Very funny, dude, but I don't row that boat. Besides, you aren't my type."

"I'm _Steffi's, _so fuck you," Brian countered, laughing and tossing the cushion back.

The doorbell rang; Dallas got up and retrieved the order, giving the deliveryman a sizeable tip, taking into consideration it had been twenty three degrees outside.

"Dinner has arrived," he announced, setting down the pizza. "Dig in."

"That means no making out during the movie, Spanky," Paul warned, taking a few slices of pizza. "Pizza doesn't taste very good the second time around, if you know what I mean."

"Shut up," Brian laughed. "And save some for the rest of us, you fat fuck. This is probably your third dinner anyway."

"Second," Paul grinned at his best friend. "but who's counting?"

Everyone then got comfortable and finished their dinner and to watch the movie until they got sleepy and each had dozed off. It was the perfect night for things to be set straight again and enjoy each other's friendship as before.

.


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter 21**

"I can't believe he did that," Paul shook his head as they all sat in the hotel suite they had split with Brian several days later. "I came in because I was too ashamed to stand next to him."

"Come on, this is _Brian," _Dallas laughed. "We've both known him long enough that nothing he does should shock us anymore."

"Yeah, good point, but Brian went on the balcony _naked, _then started flipping off cars driving by. He was encouraging me to join him, but you can see, I'm already shirtless and didn't need people getting ideas." Paul gave a shudder. "Freaking hell."

"And still at it from the looks of things." Dallas nodded toward the balcony.

"Oh God, I think I'm scarred for life. Every time we look out there, we're going to see his ass. Every time someone would honk he'd grab his 'little friend' and shake it while flipping them off So I said 'fuck it' and came inside. Poor Steffi; I think she's traumatized. I can't blame her for hiding in her room after seeing _that. _Think we should check on her?"

"I think once the initial shock wears off, she'll be fine," Dallas replied.

"Hey, guys, great day out there," Brian grinned when he walked in from the balcony.

"Oh, thank God you came inside," Paul sighed.

"Oh, was I supposed to pull out?" Brian asked jokingly, causing Dallas to practically choke on his coffee.

"Dude, come on, it isn't enough that you probably scarred your woman–and the two of us–for life, but showing your 'stuff' on a balcony that's two stories up from the _freeway?"_

"It was my way of saying 'Bitch don't honk at me, you couldn't handle all this!' Where's Stef?"

"Hiding in her room recovering from shock. I was about to take her some eye bleach after Dallas and I used some," Paul said. "Jesus, Brian, you flashed your 'goodies' for the world!"

"You say that like it's a bad thing. I may have given someone some good memories of me flashing them."

"You may have also scarred half of the state," Paul groaned. "Seriously, if you're going in there to see Stef, put some fucking clothes on or at least some pants."

"Why? It isn't like we haven't seen each other in the raw before."

"Dude!" Paul cried.

"Don't worry about it, Paul," Dallas shook his head. "I already know about the few times they uh…"

"Wild, passionate lovemaking," Brian joked.

Paul cut in. "Yeah, but she never saw this dirty freak flashing it on a public balcony!"

"Anyway," Dallas cleared his throat, turning to Brian. "He does have a point. If you're going in there, at least get decent and put some pants on."

"Geez, what a couple of prudes," Brian said, picking up a pair of jeans. "I'll be in the john getting 'decent', as you all put it."

Dallas was about to say something else when Brian opened the bathroom door without thinking and a loud screech followed.

"Oh my God!" Brian exclaimed, turning ten shades of red. "Steffi, I am SO sorry!" He slammed the door shut and came back out, flushed.

"I just walked in on Stef," he said breathlessly. "Why didn't one of you say she was in there?"

"Actually, I was about to when you barged in there like a bull in a china shop," Dallas replied.

"Holy shit," Paul said. "Now you've really scarred her for life, Spanky."

Steffi came out of the bathroom, looking a little flustered. "It's perfectly fine, guys," she said before turning to Brian, who had put on pants by this time. "Just knock next time."

"Sorry," Brian said, not looking at her.

"Paul, I'm going to grab us some lunch," Dallas spoke up, "Coming?"

"I really…" he began before getting the hint. "Oh, sure. You might need help carrying some shit."

"Good slave boy," Brian winked. "Don't wear him out too much, Dallas."

When the two of them had gone, Steffi had come into the room and Brian still wouldn't look at her. He may have waved his dick for the world not long before, but knowing he embarrassed the one person he cared about make him uneasy.

Steffi was the first to speak. "Brian, I'm not mad at you," she said reassuringly. "So you walked in on me while I was in the bathroom while you still had no clothes on. I won't die from it. I'm good, okay?"

He finally looked at her for the first time that morning. "Are you sure?" he asked.

Steffi nodded. "The fact that you were so embarrassed about it shows what a gentleman you are," she replied, placing a kiss on his cheek. "And it isn't like I haven't seen you naked before." She giggled.

"Yeah, well it's not like I'd go bragging about our sex life or whatnot," he said. "Especially to Paul. He'd never let me live it down."

"You're so cute." She gave him a hug.

Brian raised an eyebrow. "You know, we have at least half an hour before our slaves return."

Steffi lit up. "We do, don't we? Well, I'm sure we can find something to pass the time."

_Thirty minutes later:_

"For the love of Christ, Paul, do we have to make you a chain to keep your room card key on?" Dallas sighed as they carried lunch items back to the suite. "Brian's right; you'd forget your head if it wasn't attached to your shoulders.

"Sorry, man," Paul replied. "You were in such a hurry to drag my ass out of there I didn't have a chance to grab it."

Dallas handed him the bags. "Hold this shit. Good thing I always keep mine in my pocket or we'd never get into the room."

"Spanky's in there," Paul shook his head. "We could knock."

"No thanks; the last thing we'd need is him answering the door naked. As you said earlier, we've been scarred enough."

Soon Dallas slid his key through the card slot and was fumbling with the doorknob. When they threw the door open they found Brian and Steffi kissing, oblivious to their presence.

"Does he have his hand on her ass?" Paul asked, eyes widening.

Brian broke the kiss and smirked at his friends. "Yes, I do," he said. "Now if you'll excuse us." He took Steffi and headed to her room, leaving Paul and Dallas looking after them, speechless.


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter 22**

"Dude, this is a vacation for us bums," Paul pointed out when he saw Dallas surrounded by paperwork, his phone and laptop. "Spanky and Stef are at the show run through, which will be awhile, so this is our time to be chillaxing and chasing some _senoritas. _You coming?"

Dallas shook his head. "No matter where I am, there's always work. Besides, I have a dilemma here that needs to be straightened out, and I can't exactly give up until I find a suitable option."

"Must be something pretty important," Paul replied. "Well, if you change your mind, I'll be down at the bar and maybe save some sexy broads for you."

Dallas managed a chuckle. "You do that; enjoy yourself before your no-compete expires, which I understand will be a in a few weeks, not to mention your Germany gig is long off yet. Just don't do anything stupid down there; the last thing I need to hear tonight is Brian's mouth going off because you were being what he calls 'a dopefuck'. Have fun nevertheless."

"_Adios," _Paul grinned, about to leave.

"Paul," Dallas reminded him. "Room key card."

"Right," he nodded, picking it up off a corner stand. "Thanks, man."

"Don't do anything I wouldn't do," Dallas winked, going back to work.

After Paul had gone, Dallas sighed and shook his head again, staring at the laptop screen. He hadn't gone into detail with the guys, but he was in a bind. Steffi's audiologist had told him she had needed new hearing aids, but the problem was that they were far more expensive than Steffi's insurance would cover, and that was only for _one_ hearing aid.

Dallas wasn't sure what to do or how to raise the funds to cover the rest of the costs. Even the sites he'd researched so far in an attempt to possibly switch Steffi's insurance carrier hadn't wielded any answers. There was only one thing left to do, and he hated the idea and wanted to avoid that option unless it was absolutely the last resort.

_Meanwhile:_

"So what did you think of the show run through?" Brian asked cheerfully. "Just think, you get what most people out there would kill for, a preview of what's going to be happening tonight."

Steffi hadn't responded, engrossed what she had been doing. He gave a perplexed look and raised her head to face him. "Stef, I was talking to you."

"What?" She looked back at him, aquamarine eyes staring quizzically.

"I was asking how you liked the run through," he repeated.

"Oh, that. I liked it very much."

"Are you okay? Did I do something wrong?"

Steffi shook her head, digging at each ear before adjusting her hearing aids. "I think my batteries must be going again." She gave a sigh. "Dallas just put new ones in these not long ago."

Brian gave a sigh of relief. "Damn, and here I thought I was in the doghouse about something."

She smiled at him. "Why would you think that? You have such a guilty conscience!"

"Blame it on a lifetime of trauma," he cracked, "especially being around one's best friend who draws women like moths to a flame, while the short guy here didn't get much action."

Steffi put an arm around him, laying her head on his shoulder. "Well, it's _their_ loss, because they're missing out on what a great guy you are. To be honest, if it had been up to me and things didn't happen how they really did, I'd chosen you anyway."

Brian was taken aback. "You _would have? _Wow. Usually I'm the guy that girls will have as a buddy, but not much else."

"I would. You're goofy, but you have this nice serious side too. You see beauty in things, and I've seen how fans really like you despite you having an evil character now. You may not have gone to college like Paul did, but you're smart and have _street _sense, and that counts far more than some lame book smarts. And you're not judgmental of anyone."

"Well, yeah, I always believed everyone's beautiful, everyone has beautiful features, everyone IS beautiful, in their own way. You could show me the ugliest woman in the world and I'd find something _beautiful_ about her. So to judge someone on their appearance, or size, or a disability, something they can not control, is pathetic."

Steffi had to smile. "I agree."

"To this DAY, I get so much shit, but I block it out nowadays. Even my own best friend talks a bunch of shit about me."

"Well, he _shouldn't. _He doesn't know how good he has it to have someone as awesome as you in his life. He should be more appreciative like I am." She smiled again. "Besides, I don't have to worry about if I need a stepladder to kiss you."

He broke out laughing and hugged her. "I knew you were special for some reason. Come on, we better head back to the hotel before Paul corrupts Dallas into having an orgy or some kind of wild shit that will get security called up. He's good for that one."

_A short time later:_

They had arrived back to their suite, seeing Paul still gone, but had heard Dallas speaking in the next room. Steffi had gone to use the bathroom and Brian had kicked off his shoes before heading toward the sound of Dallas' voice to let him know they had returned.

"I know her insurance covers $1,000 for hearing aid costs," he heard Dallas say on the phone. "But that's only for one device and the total cost for Steffi's new ones are over three thousand dollars each for both of the kind she's going to need. The only way I can either pay the whole thing out of pocket or come up with the remaining five thousand is to go into her trust, and I don't want to do that, because it's her income to live on outside of the survivor's benefits her father left. But if that is the case, I don't have much choice."

_What the hell? _Brian thought. _No wonder the old dog had been preoccupied all afternoon. It also explains why I thought Stef was preoccupied earlier. She doesn't need batteries, just new hearing aids, and Dallas was busting ass to get them for her!_

He then thought of a plan, quickly pulling his phone out and making a call. Steffi had brought so much happiness into his life; wasn't it time to return the favor and relieve Dallas' own burden at the same time?

"Yes, hello," Brian said, identifying himself. "I need to make a money transfer."


	23. Chapter 23

**Chapter 23**

They had been back home for a few days when the phone had rung. Without looking away from his laptop, Dallas answered it.

"Mr. Collins?" a woman's voice asked.

"Yes, speaking," Dallas replied.

"This is Carol from Dr. Schneider's office. I'm calling to let you know Stefanie's hearing aids are ready to be picked up. We need to get her in sometime this week."

"Wait a minute," Dallas said. "I thought her insurance didn't cover the entire cost of those and I was going to put that on hold."

"Well, we did get that notice, and the insurance covered one thousand dollars, but they are paid in full. Can Stefanie come in Friday afternoon?"

"Wow, that must have been some deep discount to have the insurance cover them." Dallas was trying his best to hide the confusion he felt.

"Actually, the remaining balance was picked up by someone else. A very nice young man called here inquiring about the total cost. We then received funds for five thousand dollars from an account with an address in Venice, California."

Dallas nodded, now knowing exactly what was going on, but how did _Brian_ know the situation Dallas had been in? Steffi hadn't even known, so it couldn't have come from her.

"I think I know that generous young man, Carol," he finally said. "And yes, I can have Steffi come in Friday afternoon. I'm sure she will be thrilled to get this news."

_A few hours later:_

"I never thought the cheapest dude I know would drop five grand on a woman," Paul shook his head. "Then again, you think nothing of writing a thousand dollar check each time you fail a piss test for weed."

"This coming from a guy that can blow two hundred grand on booze, travel and women in three months' time," Brian countered. "In the case of five grand, it was an important situation."

"Hell, if I was blowing five grand on one chick, it would be a diamond watch and I better get some damn good sex out of it afterward."

"And you say _I'm_ a dirty freak," Brian looked at him. "For your information, dumbass, a diamond watch isn't going to help Steffi hear any better, and I'm not looking to get laid. I could do that _without_ putting out five bucks, let alone five grand. Jesus."

"Wait. You bought her _hearing aids? _Wow, aren't you Mr. Romance."

"It's something her doctor said she _needed, _Paul," Brian replied with a tad of disgust.

"For five grand, those fuckers better be lined in platinum and diamonds."

"Actually, they're a bit more high tech than the ones she has now. Something about increasing sound in some way and more comfortable inside her ears."

"Hey, maybe now she can pick up radio signals," Paul said with a goofy grin.

"Will you quit making a fucking joke out of everything?" Brian asked, glaring. "I'd like to think I'm a decent guy for at least putting forth the effort to make the life of someone I happen to care about easier. Did you ever stop to think that if she has these, we may be able to communicate a little better?"

"Geez, testy midget, aren't you? In all seriousness though, buddy, it's a pretty generous thing you did. It may open a whole new world for Stef, thanks to your big ass heart. So do they know about you being such a generous benefactor?"

"Not really, but I have a gut feeling that they're going to find out soon enough."

Paul then looked down and raised an eyebrow. "Dude, either your pocket's vibrating or you are _very happy _to see me."

"Yeah, it would help if I answered my phone," Brian answered, reaching in for it.

_Meanwhile:_

"I know how much you love Steffi, but don't you think that was a little _too_ generous?" Dallas asked.

"Nothing is too good for my lady," Brian said. "It's clearly something she needed, so it's no big deal. Better for two hearing aids than five weed test failing fines. At least I know the hearing aids would be getting used."

"How _exactly_ did you find out about this situation anyway when Steffi didn't even have any idea?"

"Let's just say I inadvertently overheard you discussing it with what I presumed was her hearing doctor. You aren't pissed, are you?"

"Not exactly, but that's a lot of cash to help someone out, Brian. At least let us make it up to you."

"Nothing doing, old dog. Lord knows the two of you have done more than enough for me the last several months than I can ever say. And while on the subject, are you two still heading back out here Wednesday?"

"Depends on the weather," Dallas answered. "Steffi will have her new hearing aids by then, but the weather bureau is calling for sub zero temperatures and snow to come in by the weekend, which means possibly canceled flights. I'll have to get back to you."

"So come out after Steffi's appointment," Brian suggested. "Paul has a spare key to my place anyway, and I can put his fat ass to work letting you in to stay there until I get back. Wouldn't you rather be running around in board shorts here than freezing your balls off where you are now?"

"You're tempting me. All right, let me see if I can change the flight to Friday evening. At least by then we'll be out of here before all hell breaks loose and it's the least we can do to reward you for your generosity."


	24. Chapter 24

**Chapter 24**

_A week later:_

"Hey, Steffi, watch this," Brian signed to her while Paul's back was turned to them, engrossed in some action movie. "Hey, Paul!"

Paul grunted in response, "Eh?"

"Don't look down, buddy, but there's a spider."

Paul snapped to attention fearfully, **"WHERE?!!"**

"It's about to go up your leg," Brian said calmly.

Paul jumped what appeared to be at least a foot off the couch, hitting his head on the back wall. "Kill it!" he yelled, cowering at one end, legs curled up.

Brian and Steffi fell back on the loveseat, laughing hysterically.

"Spanky, you ass! You know how I hate spiders."

"Why? They don't eat much; in fact, they only eat Mexican food on Tuesdays. Hey, Stef, did you know in our lifetime, we swallow an average of eight spiders in our sleep?"

"**BRIAN!" **Paul yelled. **"DON'T FUCK WITH ME!"**

"Dude, don't look now, but it just crawled in your hair."

Immediately, Paul jumped up and began to dance around, frantically running his hands through his hair trying to get it out. Brian and Steffi laughed until there were tears in their eyes as Paul did a jerky dance trying to get rid of the phantom spider.

When he finally stopped he glared at them, especially at Brian, who was now rolling on the floor.

"What the hell is going on in here with all the bellowing?" Dallas wondered as he came in the room.

Brian tried in vain to catch his breath. "Paul…Paul…we told him there was a spider going up his leg and he jumped twenty feet in the air…and then that it was in his hair….and he started doing this dance!"

Brian was still laughing as Steffi got up and started demonstrating the "dance" for Dallas.

"I did NOT do that!" Paul protested.

"You're right; hey, Stef, you need a little more leg action."

Paul glared at him again. "I despise you, you little blond sociopath. You're going to hell." With that, he threw a cushion at Brian, stopping the laughing.

"And you're going down, beaner," Brian replied, tossing it back. "Just when you least expect it, I will ass rape you yet."

"Seriously, you have issues, Brian," Dallas said, chuckling. "How the hell did you tolerate him on the road for almost four years, Paul?"

"It wasn't easy," Paul replied.

"You weren't exactly a saint either, dude," Brian countered.

"Ah yes, those were the days, eh, Spanky?"

"Yeah, you aren't kidding, my man. By the way, there wasn't a spider."

"I knew you were fucking with me!" Paul cried, beginning to chase his best friend around the room, eventually heading outside.

Steffi looked after them with concern before glancing back at Dallas.

"Let them go," he reassured her. "It's common knowledge by now neither of them stop until they kill each other."

_Later:_

Steffi had been cleaning up the kitchen, washing the dishes in the sink and putting away the ones that were already clean. The smell of fresh brownies also filled the room.

Brian had slid in quietly, preparing to be decked as he sneaked up on her. He hadn't even given much thought to the small burp that had sneaked out.

"Hi Brian," she said without turning around, continuing to put some things away.

He stood there, stunned. "Wow, those new hearing aids must be working. How did you know it was me who came in here instead of Paul or Dallas?"

"You stomp through this place like a Clydesdale horse," she giggled, finally turning around. "Not to mention the smell of food draws you like white on rice."

"Especially when you're making it. With Paul, God knows what kind of shit he's going to stick in it that will burn out my guts. Are they done yet?"

"Ten more minutes," she nodded, "but you have to eat dinner first."

He got a mischievous gleam in his eye, pulling Steffi into his arms. "Can I have you as an appetizer?"

"Hey, horny midget," Paul yelled from the other room. "If you two start having sex out there, Dallas and I are ordering out."

"Yeah, like we're going to do it with you two morons around. So slave boy, how about getting off your lazy ass and helping the lady out here? She isn't here for our convenience, you know!"

"That really isn't necessary," Steffi protested.

"Let him earn his keep," Brian grinned. "He isn't doing anything except sitting on his fat ass taking up space anyway. Just keep an eye on him to make sure he doesn't slip anything into the food that isn't supposed to be there."

_That evening:_

After dinner and enjoying Steffi's brownies for dessert, Paul and Dallas made plans to go out, Paul insisting Dallas needed to 'get out more often.'

"I got an idea. Why don't you call Zeke and have him join you guys?" Brian suggested.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Paul asked. "He'll eat us alive. Did you forget what he did to Truth the other night? Holy shit."

"Aw come on, Paul, you don't know the half of it. He's a really cuddly dude inside. Seriously, one night when we were on the road for a show, I thought I was dreaming when I went to his room and found this big black man in baby blue jammies and bunny slippers with a matching nightcap. I thought I was on _crack."_

Dallas raised an eyebrow. "Are you sure you weren't?"

"No, I knew for sure I wasn't seeing things when I saw him a few times the same way after that."

"On second thought, maybe we should call the big man," Paul grinned. "Maybe have a slumber party. We have to see this for ourselves."

"I don't think he does slumber parties, Paul, but he may take you guys up on free drinks."

"Sure, why not?" Dallas nodded. "It will be interesting in any case."

_In the early hours:_

Paul and Dallas had returned, bringing Zeke with them for a nightcaps. Paul had gone to use the bathroom while the other two men had gotten comfortable and prepared to watch DVD's.

"Hey, Dallas?" Paul asked when he came back out. "Did Steffi say anything to you about going out?"

Dallas looked alarmed. "No, why?"

"She's not in her room and the bed hasn't even been slept in."

"Oh my God," Dallas said anxiously, "Where's Brian? I trusted him to be here with her."

"It's pretty quiet back there, so I'm guessing isn't around either. He couldn't be sleeping because he is one noisy homeboy when he does."

"They probably went out for a bit," Dallas nodded, popping a beer. "Let just watch the movie."

The three men sat in front of the TV, downing beer and snacks before Zeke excused himself to use the bathroom. He had heard some noise in one of the bedrooms and thought nothing of it, figuring perhaps his little buddy was home after all. He went to do his business without further thought.

He had just washed his hands and was about to leave to rejoin Dallas and Paul when the door opened, and a startled–and stark naked Brian–stood before him.

"Fucking hell, Zeke!" Brian yelled. "What are you doing here?"

"Holy shit!" Zeke cried. "We thought you were gone! Good God, put some clothes on; nobody wants to look at that."

Zeke made a face as he went back out to the front room, the look not lost on Paul or Dallas.

"What's the matter, big guy?" Dallas asked.

"Let's just say Brian _is_ home," Zeke replied, clearing his throat. "Up close and au naturale, in fact."

"Oh God, I think I'm going to puke," Paul said. "You mean the whole time we've been out here, they were back there _fucking? _God!" He shuddered.

"Guess that was the after dinner bonus," Dallas shook his head. "No wonder he was so eager to get rid of us."

Brian came out grinning nonchalantly, wearing only jeans. "Hey dudes," he said. "You too, Paul."

Paul noticed his best friend's tousled hair. "So was it good for you too?"

Brian got a couple of cans of soda from the refrigerator, winking. "I don't kiss and tell, but if you ever give in for a night with me, it could be good for you too."


	25. Chapter 25

**Chapter 25**

_Several weeks later:_

Tina noticed her most dedicated employee had been a bit more reserved lately. Since she had gotten into a relationship, Steffi had been more talkative, but in the last month or so, she was once again quiet, not to mention she wasn't as focused on her work.

Finally, Tina had called the girl into her office one day after Steffi arrived at the workshop, expressing her concerns. "Is there something you'd like to talk about, Steffi?" she asked gently.

Steffi shook her head and shrugged. "Not really."

"There must be something bothering you; your production has fallen off the last couple of weeks and that isn't like you at all," Tina continued. "Whatever it is, nothing will leave this office."

"Tina…..I…I'm late."

"No, Steffi, you're perfectly on time as you always are."

"No, I mean I am _late."_

"Late with what?" Tina was confused, then it had dawned on her. "Your period?"

Steffi nodded, wide eyed. "I always got it on time before."

"Well, Steffi, you're about to head to trade college and your last few weeks of work here, plus of course, your first boyfriend. That's a lot to carry. You're probably having an effect of stress."

"Or I might be pregnant," Steffi replied. "I can't have a baby. Not right now!"

"Honey, have you discussed this with Dallas?" Tina asked.

Steffi shook her head frantically. "No! I can't talk to him about 'girl things'!"

"Tell you what," Tina answered. "Let's take you downstairs to the company doctor and have her look you over and take a test. At least if we get a solid answer, it will put your mind at ease and perhaps these last few weeks with us will go a little easier on you."

Steffi smiled for the first time that morning. "Thank you, Tina."

"Meet me on lunch break. I'll call Dr. McCoy and let her know we will be down."

_Meanwhile:_

"Earth to Spanky," Paul said.

Brian snapped out of his trance. "Huh?"

"Nice to know I'm so fascinating, dude. What the fuck has been wrong with you lately? You haven't been your happy ass self, even when smoking the gonz."

"It's Steffi," Brian finally answered.

Paul perked up. "Is she okay?"

"I wish I knew. The last several weeks, she hasn't talked much. I can't think of anything I did that would piss her off, though. She's just been….._strange."_

"What _did _you do, knock her up? Lord knows you don't like putting on the rain gear before you do a girl."

"Paul, cut the jokes. If you insist on being a smart ass, no, I doubt that it is the case or she'd told me something by now."

"Hypothetically speaking, what would you do if she was?"

"What could I do? It would put a kink into things, but I'd step up to the plate and help Steffi take care of it. It would be my kid, after all. Who else would pass on a legacy of funny looking, short things?"

"Doesn't look like you'd be too upset in any case. Have you talked to her about that?"

"If I _could _talk to her," Brian sighed.

"Why don't you call Dallas?" Paul suggested. "Tell him what you told me, that you're worried about her. He probably knows what's going on more than you do."

"Already ahead of you, man. He doesn't know much more. She's been weird around him too."

"Jesus, this has to be something serious. That isn't like the girl at all."

"Could be nervous about starting school," Paul said.

"Yeah, maybe, but surely she would have talked to me and Dallas about that."

"Well, whatever it is, dude, I'm sure it will work out; it always does. Women get strange moments and then it's all back to normal again."

_That afternoon:_

"What if the test is positive?" Steffi asked, clearly nervous after her appointment. "What will I do?"

Tina was sympathetic. "Steffi, have you even talked to your boyfriend about this?"

"No. I don't want to ruin his career or reputation." Steffi shook her head.

"If you are indeed pregnant, Steffi, it isn't something you'll be able to hide forever."

"He's going to be so mad at me for being stupid."

"Or maybe not. Dallas tells me your boyfriend cares very much for you, even going as far to help pay for your new hearing aids and part of your school tuition the scholarship didn't cover. I have a feeling this isn't the type of guy that would bail on you if in fact you are having a child."

Steffi thought a moment. "We can see what the doctor says first. If the tests are positive, I won't have a choice. Okay, I'll talk to him and Dallas, but only _after _I have a definite answer."


	26. Chapter 26

**Chapter 26**

Several days later, Steffi was about to get her lunch out of the workshop refrigerator when Tina called her into the office.

"I got a visit from Dr. McCoy," she said. "Your test results are in."

Steffi sucked in her breath. "Did she way what they were?"

Tina broke into a wide smile. "You can have one less thing off your mind now. They were negative."

Steffi brightened. "Does that mean….."

Tina nodded. "Whatever the reason your period is late, you aren't pregnant."

"Oh, thank goodness! I should have known something was up, because I finally did start this morning. But I've heard of people having them right before they get pregnant, so I still wasn't sure."

"Like I said before, Steffi, it was probably stress from the changes in your life, and now at least there's one less thing to worry about. But have you ever considered birth control?"

Steffi shook her head. "I never knew how to use it and _he_ says he can't find rubbers big enough."

Tina was speechless for a moment before regaining her composure. "In any event, Dr. McCoy left me this to give to you."

Steffi took the small slip of paper. "What's this?"

"It's a prescription for pills to help prevent another possible scare like this one. You may not be so lucky next time. Just follow the instructions and you should be fine."

"Okay. This may be a good idea. I'm not really ready for kids, so just as well that things turned out the way they did." She gave Tina a hug. "Thank you."

_That evening:_

Steffi had been working on her computer journal when an instant message popped up. She had been talking to another friend from the workshop and realized she'd forgotten to sign out.

"Whatever it is, Stef, we need to talk about it _now," _Brian had written. "This shit of avoiding me and being evasive has to stop. Cut to the chase."

She nodded to herself; it was indeed time. "Not on here," she responded. "Could you call me?"

He hadn't been expecting such an answer, considering the way she'd been acting over the last several weeks. "Sure," he said. "Give me five minutes to get the Mexican Idiot out of the room. He can jack off to lesbian porn somewhere else."

Five minutes passed before Steffi's TTY beeped and she answered, knowing it was Brian.

"So what's going on? Did I do something wrong to upset you?" he asked without premable.

Steffi sighed, thinking he should know the truth of her recent concerns, especially now that she had confirmation that it all had been a false alarm. "I had something really bad on my mind," she finally said.

"It had to be bad the way you'd acted weird around me the last few weeks. Come on, Stef, spill it."

Steffi cut to the chase. "I thought I was pregnant."

"_What?" _He was incredulous.

"See, I knew you'd act like this," she sighed, "but it was a false alarm anyway."

"Stef, why didn't you say something?"

"I didn't want you to think you would be trapped with someone like me and a child neither of us were ready for," she replied. "I didn't want your career ruined because of me."

"Sweetheart, why would you even think that? Okay, maybe I was freaking out every time someone mentioned kids in the past, but if you _had_ been pregnant, we'd found some way to work it out. And ruin my career? That's the biggest line of bullshit I've heard; as I always said, people I date have nothing to do with my ring ability, and if they don't like whom I'm hanging out with, fuck them. This is Brian, baby."

"_The _Brian," Steffi giggled, relieved.

"Right," he replied. "Listen, I should be more receptive to the idea of having kids, but I've been kind of hesitant about it not only because I want to be a bit more financially stable first, but also the fact my own dad was an asshole and I don't want to end up like him. I also shouldn't have made you feel like you couldn't tell me what was going on."

"It's okay, at least things turned out for the best anyway," Steffi reassured him.

"So does this mean you'll stick around this funny-looking short thing after all?"

"Stop it!" she laughed. "You are _not_ funny looking or that short! Even if you were, I'd still stay with you."

"In that case, I love you and I want to marry you…if you'll have me."


	27. Chapter 27

**Chapter 27**

"Wait, what?" Paul asked after Brian told him of the conversation between him and Steffi.

"Yeah, that's what how it all went down, but you probably had your big ears to the door and knew anyway."

"Dude! You actually proposed? I _was_ right about the knocked up thing!"

"Of course. And relax, _chico_, Stef isn't pregnant. It was a false alarm, though it wouldn't have mattered if she had been."

"Well, don't hold back. What did she say?"

"For me to know and you to find out. And if you say a word about this to _anyone, _I will prison rape you."

"Yeah, I guess a dude who is supposed to be this cocky stud on TV wouldn't come off very well with a wife."

"Well, not so much that as it is that I'd rather have it come straight from my mouth rather than you telling the world and screwing it up in the process."

"No offense, dude, but of all the chicks you could have had, why _her?"_

"Are we going to start this shit again?" Brian asked, a bit put off. "Just because Steffi isn't your idea of a woman that should have big tits, small waist, collarbones poking out, spinal cord bumping up, tiny little thighs you could break off, and no ass doesn't make her less of a person. And God forbid, she's _partially deaf."_

"That isn't what I meant at all. Come on, no woman digs blondes. They like the tall, dark and God-like guys."

"Nice to see you still think so highly of yourself, Paul. That's another thing; Stef has standards, and it's good to know there's some out there that do. You may also keep in mind that the person you love is always going to be the most beautiful person in your eyes."

He patted his best friend's shoulder, grinning. "Maybe if you weren't such a player, you wouldn't be alone and have a nice woman to come home to like I will pretty soon."

"So wait, she _accepted?"_

"Yeah. What's the matter, home skillet, shocked and jealous the short blond guy won this round?" Brian gave a wicked grin. "Finally, a woman who likes blondes. Come on, I'm short, funny looking, nerdy and geeky, and spend all my time reading. I have never read that in a woman's standards list, at least until Dallas introduced me to Steffi."

"Speaking of which, does Dallas even know what's going on?"

"Not yet, but after the taping on Tuesday, I'm making a side trip East and having a sit down with him before I propose formally to Stef."

"Didn't you do that part already?"

"Paul, proposing over the phone isn't exactly the most romantic thing in the world. Jesus. Im not anything like you finding instant love after getting a seventeen minute blow job from some chick."

"Very fucking funny, Spanky. Fine, rub my nose in it."

Brian lit a cigarette, still grinning. "Damn right I will."

"So was this a sudden decision after the knocked up scare or had you been thinking of it awhile?"

"Awful nosy, aren't you? Not that it's any of your business, but I've been thinking over the last several weeks."

"Wow, still unbelievable. To think when it came down to the two of us using the same lines, I usually got the girl, but now it ends up _you _get married. Where's the justice?"

"Maybe this isn't just any chick," Brian shook his head.. "Again, I'm not like you, Paul. I'm not going to go out there and jump anything that moves or willing to give you a blow job behind a bar, with you thinking they are _the one _each time. There's more to women than looks and being a good piece of ass."

"I'll have you know I have standards," Paul replied.

"Yeah, she has to have a pulse, look like Barbie, have big tits, have their legs open for business, have no fucking brains and be a gold digger," Brian snapped.

"Asshole," Paul said, pouting.

"Yeah, an asshole with a woman who thinks short blond men do it better." He gave Paul's shoulder a pat. "I guess this time _you_ have to be the one to watch and learn, eh homey?"


	28. Chapter 28

**Chapter 28**

"Come on," Dallas chuckled a few days later, "is this another one of your jokes? Seriously, Brian, I know you're a clown, but something like this?"

Brian gave him a look. "Who said anything about joking? I'll _show_ you joking, you old dog."

With that, he had pulled out the simple ring he had chosen for Steffi, getting down on one knee and proposing formally. With a squeal, she accepted once again.

"Holy hell, you _are_ serious." Dallas looked at the two of them, totally amazed

Steffi nodded eagerly and smiled, indicating he was right.

"You mean you aren't going to yell and raise all kinds of hell about it?" Brian was almost shocked at Dallas' reaction.

Dallas shook his head. "Let's just say I need the shock to wear off first and leave it at that. Don't worry about me, though. Did you kids pick a date?"

"Dude, we barely made it official; you think we even thought about a date yet? Plus Stef's going to be starting school soon, not to mention all the WrestleMania hell coming up for me from next month up until April. There's going to be block parties, appearances, shows, the overseas bullshit we have every year, Hall of Fame, and who knows what else in between. Either of us will barely have time to take a shit, much less think of a date."

"Comes with the job," Steffi nodded in agreement.

"Look at that. Finally a girl that not only loves blondes and understands me, but also understands my work. Damn, Dallas, where did you find this gem?"

"I've looked after Stef's affairs and been her interpreter since she was sixteen after her folks died," Dallas said with a grin.

Brian thought for a moment. "You know, the bride's going to need someone to give her away."

"You haven't set a date yet and already looking for someone to give Steffi away? Leave it to you to twist things up, buddy."

"Well, do you want to do it or not? Otherwise, I may have to employ Mexican Slave Boy and Stef over here isn't exactly his biggest fan sometimes. Or I could call my brother up in Washington, but he's kind of scary looking."

"Of course I'd do it. You two should know me better than that by now." Dallas was truly honored; he had secretly dreamed of a day like this since he had first gotten Steffi's case.  
Dallas also knew deep down that had it been anyone else, he would be apprehensive about letting her go so easily. But this was _Brian;_ he had treated her like a little princess and been so good for her self-confidence.

Aside from the hearing issue on Steffi's part, perhaps it had been that Brian had known the pain of loneliness and isolation himself for so many years, of being the odd man out in a world of "perfect" people. He didn't judge, he was compassionate, and most importantly, he made Steffi happy.

"Earth to Dallas," Brian said, snapping Dallas out of his thoughts.

"Yeah?"

"Wow, you were really deep in thought there. Are you sure you're all right with this?"

"Actually, I was just thinking about organizing an engagement dinner for you two." Dallas gave a reassuring smile.

"You don't have to do that, man. We're not planning on a huge production."

"Who said anything about a huge production? Us and a few mutual friends. It's not rocket science and I can arrange it in less than an hour."

"At least let me go half on it," Brian offered.

"Nothing doing, shorty," Dallas shook his head. "It will be your night once things are planned and I'm picking up the tab this time. Lord knows you've done more than your share as it is. All I want from you is to make that little lady over there happy right up until both of you are in the old folks' home."


	29. Chapter 29

**Chapter 29**

_One week later:_

"Where's your sidekick?" Dallas asked.

"Fuck him," Brian scoffed. "He's embarrassed me one last time. Also note he is _not to be invited_ to the wedding."

"What the hell happened this time?"

"Do you want me to begin where the idiot got drunk on his ass and smoked three bowls of gonz on top of that, or when he started making sexist comments and pissed off half the women in the place last night?"

"Oh no…." Dallas groaned. "Was Stef with you by any chance?"

"Hell, Steffi was not only present when all of this went down, but also came close to breaking it off with _me_ and wouldn't talk for over three hours before I had to set her straight that I didn't share the same views. I'm lucky I didn't end up sleeping on the couch because of that asshole's bullshit."

"Jesus Christ. What_ is _his problem lately? He was never like this before."

"I know. I'm not even a woman and half the shit Paul said _I_ didn't even find funny. God, Dallas, I hope you don't think any less of me because of all of this."

"Of course I don't; we know each other better than that."

"Thanks, man. But seriously, dude is fucked up in the head and has been nothing but a druggie party boy and a bitter whore ever since he got his walking papers. People lose their jobs every day, Dallas. Hell, I've lost my last three matches and not even going to be on TV next week, but do you see me bitching and finding ways to make an ass of myself in public? If the dumbass hasn't lost fans enough already, this probably did it for sure, and Lord knows he can't afford to lose more than he already has. He loses fans, no promotion will want to book him if he can't get asses in seats."

"Someone needs to get their act together," Dallas replied.

"Exactly! Finally, someone besides Stef who _gets it. _Even she wants nothing more to do with him, and at this point, I can't blame her."

"Is there anything lined up for Paul?" Dallas inquired.

"Well, according to the jackass, he's got 'all these prospects', but between the two of us, I think he's full of shit. He's done nothing in the past two and a half months except that pod cast of his brother's—which he was higher than a fucking kite and made an ass of himself again with some stupid comments that pissed people off—and hang out on sites hitting on bimbos age 21 and under. The only thing that's been solid so far is that gig coming up in Germany on May first, but I wouldn't be surprised if he screws that up too. He barely lasted under Behrens for three whole _days."_

"My God," Dallas said. "I didn't know any of that."

"Oh, there's more. The last relationship he had was with a great person that everyone liked, but lo and behold, he blew that too and got dumped. I'm almost ashamed to admit _I've _known him all these years. Dallas, he doesn't even check in with me much anymore to see how I am like he used to. Says he is 'busy'. Bullshit. I guess being a junkie whore takes priority over one's friends and making something out of their lives."

"I'm sorry, Brian."

"Don't be. It's onward and upward from here. Besides, I have Steffi, a lot of other friends, an amazingly supportive family, some charisma and a dream that I happen to be living. Five out of six isn't bad."

"And a great attitude," Dallas added with a chuckle before looking around. "Where is Stef anyway?"

Brian gestured toward the ladies' room. "Needed to make a 'pit stop', as she politely put it."

"But everything's all right between you two?"

Brian gave a sly wink. "Never better, especially after we had that long talk last night when I finally got her to speak to me."

"Okay, mister, stop right there!" Dallas let out a hearty laugh. "Otherwise, I'm going to learn more than I ever needed to know!"

"Aw, damn, and to think I was going to confide the details," Brian joked.

"Some things are better off not being known." Dallas shook his head and smiled. "By the way, the little lady of yours is headed back here, so we better behave ourselves."

"Me behave? Yeah, Dallas, like that will ever happen. Hell will probably freeze over first."

"And that, my friend," Dallas grinned, "is what makes you _you."_


	30. Chapter 30

**Chapter 30**

A week later when Dallas had gone to visit Brian and Steffi. It wasn't lost on him there were some changes in the house; in addition to a flashing light being installed on the smoke detectors and a blinking light if someone rang the doorbell.

Dallas couldn't help but smile when he saw a new phone with an amplifier and a captioning feature. No more TTY for her, at least in this house. In addition, Brian had also splurged for a Clarity C900 cell phone for Stef's last birthday. Bri had indeed gone all out to accommodate her.

_Now that's love, _Dallas had thought to himself, smiling slightly.

"I have a feeling from now on the _vato_ is going to behave himself," Brian said that afternoon.

"I thought you were going to boycott Paul until he got his shit together?" Dallas raised a suspicious eyebrow.

"That was the original plan, but given the last week or so since he'd acted like an assclown in public, there's hope for him yet. One of those coming changes happens to be called Francesca."

This piqued Dallas' interest. "Francesca as in the receptionist at Stef's school?"

"Yeah, that's her. The Mexican chick with the sexy accent and the big—" He began to gesture around his chest.

"Eyes," Dallas cut in, laughing. "I get it, Brian."

"Too bad she doesn't have any ass to go with them or I'd chase her around the room a few times if I didn't already have Steffi. Anyway, they've been steaming up each other's laptops and phones practically every night. Dude hasn't even had much as one joint or a beer since they started talking. In addition to that, I kind of laid down some ground rules."

"Such as?" Dallas wondered.

"For one, no smoking the wacky tobacky unless I'm around. Second, the jokes about specific groups of people are coming to a halt; he doesn't like people making beaner jokes, so what gives him the right to poke fun at anyone else? The short jokes are fine; I'm used to them, so that's an exception as long as they're aimed at me. Third, no bitching at me if I want to spend time with Stef instead of hanging out with him and his goofy friends. Fourth, if he's got a problem with me or the woman, he's to come to _us_ with it, not talk shit with his bimbos about it. Of course, I don't think I have to worry about any more bimbos hanging around now that Francesca's in the picture. Speaking of Francesca, the fifth rule is that Paul treats her as an _equal _and with respect if he wants to continue hanging with me. None of this sexist shit."

"Sounds like a plan," Dallas nodded in agreement.

"Even Stef's gotten into the sprit of helping to straighten his ass out."

"Oh? And how is that?"

"For one, I went into the refrigerator one morning to get my coffee creamer and she had these notes on some food that said '_Paul: Eat this and I will have Brian ass rape you_.' So he's on notice not to eat anything that has a note on it. I knew I loved that woman for some reason outside of her dynamic personality, beautiful eyes, and fantastic ass."

"Not necessarily in that order," Dallas teased.

"Aw, come on, you old dog, you should know me better than that by now."

"That it's legend you're an ass guy? Of course."

"Yeah, you got me. Truth is, if I actually rowed that boat, I would whore myself to any man I'd see; case in point, my own best friend. I mean, Jesus Christ, look at him! I can't even blame Francesca for being such a horny bitch every time Paul's around. Hell, I'd go gay for him in a second."

Dallas could only shake his head and chuckle at the statement.

"But my _women?" _Brian continued. _" _I'm picky. They got to be chunky, curvy, have nice skin, beaaaautiful eyes and a big ass, and my Stef fits all the above. Anything else can shoo."

Steffi then came in, sitting down coffee for both of them. Brian gave her a grateful pat on the ass, causing her to giggle.

Dallas cleared his throat. "So how is the whole wedding thing coming?"

"Not bad. We're only doing fifty people, though. The whole big gala thing is bullshit. Stef got her dress the other day but won't show it to me."

"Bad luck to see it before the wedding, shorty. Didn't anyone tell you that?"

"Right. And yes, The Mexican Idiot is back on the guest list, as long as Francesca comes with him and he acts his age instead of his penis size. I think he will unless for some weird reason he and Francesca have impromptu sex on the banquet table. Of course, we can use him as entertainment like he was at the last wedding we attended. A bunch of us got Paul piss drunk, and when he passed out, we threw some cake at him, drew a mustache on him with washable markers, and put a sombrero on his head. I think I still have pictures on my camera phone."

"Jesus, we can dress you two up, but can't take you out. And to think Steffi is marrying into _this."_

"Come on, Dallas, you have to admit there will never be a dull moment. By the way, we also got an interpreter for the dorks that don't know sign language."

"I've could have done that," Dallas replied.

"Nothing doing; you're already giving Steffi away and are going to be a guest. That's your day off."

"Okay, you win. What about a date?"

"Still working on that."

"Wait. Steffi gets a dress, you arrange for an interpreter and look over ideas for a hall and start the guest list, but _no date?"_

Steffi came back in, understanding what he had asked, and shook her head. "Not yet. You can thank slowpoke here."

"I suggested Valentine's Day," Brian whined.

"Bri, no offense, but that's pretty cheesy," Dallas replied.

"Thank you, Dallas," Steffi said. "I said the same thing."

"Well, do you two geniuses have any better ideas?"

As if something had come to her, Steffi lit up. "I just thought of something. Your birthday!"

"What about my birthday? I'm already getting shit from Paul about turning thirty."

"I think she means she wants the wedding that day," Dallas clarified.

"_My birthday? _Stef, what the fuck?"

"Why not? You'll never forget our anniversary that way."

"I'm almost thirty, sweetheart; it doesn't mean I'm going senile. You really want this thing on my birthday?"

Steffi nodded, smiling. "You were probably planning to just go and get drunk with your buddies anyway, so why not have an excuse to hold it then?"

"Well, in that case, what the lady wants, the lady gets. May 29 it is. Let me arrange to get that week off."


	31. Chapter 31

**Chapter 31**

"Fucking hell," Brian complained, hanging up the phone.

Steffi looked at him quizzically, clearly reading his lips despite not having her hearing aids in yet.

"What?" she finally asked.

Brian sighed and looked back at her, speaking a little slower. "Do I _really _want to ponder over what our children will look like? I already figured they're going to be short, funny looking creatures."

"What brought _that_ on?" she asked.

"Ma," he replied with a frown. "She's driving me up the fucking wall. You and I are not even married yet and already she's nagging my ass for grandchildren. 'You're the oldest, Brian David; you need to set an example of stability for your brother and sister, and I'm not getting any younger either.' Jesus Christ, Stef, she's only fifty two, hardly ready for the old folks' home."

Steffi shook her head. "Thank goodness that's one less thing I have to worry about with my parents gone."

"Much as it sounds mean to say it, consider yourself lucky."

"It isn't mean. And next time you talk to your mom and she brings it up, let her know we'll have that at the top of the list on our wedding night."

Steffi had truly begun to pick up her future husband's wit. Brian began to laugh out loud before leaning closer to her and placing a soft kiss on his lips. "I really shouldn't let this shit get to me," he said. "Besides, we'll have kids soon enough."

"When?" she asked and then hoped she didn't come across as a nag.

"When the time is right we'll know. One, I'd like us to have some stability and second, I'd like to either cut down or quit wrestling first so the dwarfs we do have remember what their old man looks like instead of them saying 'Who the hell are you?' every time I walk through the front door."

"I guess you're right," Steffi nodded.

"It may work for other people, but for us I want it to be different. I don't want to add any more stress to our impending marriage before we're ready to handle it."

"You've really thought about this, haven't you?" She was clearly impressed.

"Shocking, isn't it?" he grinned. "Contrary to popular belief, your old man here actually thinks with the head on his shoulders after all."

_Meanwhile:_

Francesca walked over to Paul, giving him a whack on the head, cursing in Spanish.

"Ow! Frannie! What the hell?"

"Thank you for volunteering my place for planning a party with your savage friends without consulting me," she sniffed, dark eyes glaring at him.

"I don't know why you're bitching; it's just a barbecue for Steffi and Brian," Paul said. "You know just kick back and relax."

"Yes, but why _my_ place? I just had new carpeting put in and Papa remodeled my bathroom."

"Well, a one bedroom apartment isn't exactly ideal to have a shit load of people over, is it? Especially with Spanky's drunk ass stumbling all over it." He raised an eyebrow.

"Why not call Dallas and have him host it? I'm not cooking for your two thousand friends and having them ruin my house blowing chunks from drinking too much."

"Is it really plausible to ask people to fly back East?" Paul asked. "Your place is closer and you have that giant back yard. If you're so worried about people going into the house, Spanky and I can crack the whip and make sure no one goes in except to take a dump. Come on, Frannie; I've already invited people."

"_Exactly _how many?" Francesca inquired, annoyed.

"Well, there's you and me, Dallas, Brian and Stef, of course, a few indy guys I stood close with, and a couple of Brian's homies from the company. Oh yeah, his brother and sister might be coming too. So about….ten, fifteen people. As for cooking for 'two thousand people,' you aren't doing shit because yours truly has gotten all the barbecue food and supplies and will be king of the grill, Texas style."

Her mood lightened. "Well, in that case, I don't see the problem."

"I knew you'd come around, _mi amor. _I figured I could at least do something decent for Brian and Steffi to make up for being such a dick recently. And there will also be some fantastic sex in it for you after everyone leaves."

"Oh, the bribery of a night of wild passion," Francesca laughed. "All right, we can have it at my place. But next time you get some wild idea, will you have the courtesy of telling me first?"

Paul gave her a wink. "It's a deal."

"And another thing. No drugs, not even weed. I don't want to have to worry about the neighbors calling the cops on top of everything else."

"No worry; the strongest substance will be beer. There's only one thing I need for you to do, though."

"Oh shit, here it comes."

"No, no, nothing bad, Frannie. I was wondering if you could get your brother to do the music."

"Raymondo?"

"Yeah. Think you can check and see if he's free next weekend? Since it's the week after a PPV, Spanky will be off and the timing will be good then."

"Sure, I can do that." Francesca was clearly flattered Paul had thought of her baby brother and appreciated his talent as a MC. "But between offering up my house and Raymondo, the sex better be damn good."


	32. Chapter 32

**Chapter 32**

"Hey, Paul, your savages have arrived!" Francesca called.

"Jesus, Frannie, can a guy take a shit in peace without you yelling?" he called back. "I'll be out in a minute."

"Too much information!" She made a face.

"Aw, Francesca, you broke my heart," Brian pouted teasingly. "I didn't know you thought of me as a savage."

She gave him a hug. "Trust me, the bigger savage is hogging my bathroom. How are you, darling?"

"Never better. Hey, thanks for loaning your backyard out even though it was Paul that elected you."

"Considering it was for you and Steffi plus he's cooking, I'm not going to complain." Francesca then smiled, handing him a beer. "Make yourself at home."

"And keep him away from the grill, Frannie," Paul yelled. "It's standard procedure not to let the midget near anything that involves sharp objects, heat, or fire. Besides, one must be _this tall _to use the grill."

"Fuck you, Paul," Brian called back laughingly.

"Isn't that the purpose of Steffi?"

"Oh, God." Francesca rolled her eyes. "Will you get your ass out here and start things already? People are coming."

"Okay, but I'm bringing the rest of me too."

"Better warn you that you need to keep an eye on your spice rack, Francesca," Brian said. "The _vato_ has been known to go overboard with them."

"Thanks for the heads up," she nodded as Paul finally made his appearance.

"Dude," Brian said, pointing to Paul's jeans. "Barn door's open."

"Holy shit. Thanks, man." Paul quickly zipped up.

"And wash your hands," Francesca added.

"_Yes, dear." _He then turned back to Brian. "Don't be drinking all my fucking beer."

"This coming from a man who smoked up my last supply of gonz," Brian countered. "You still owe me sixty bucks for that shit, by the way."

"Speaking of which, I hope none of you brought that onto my property," Francesca warned, "because I even see as much as a leaf or pill that I can't identify, it's going down the toilet."

Paul gave a mock salute. _"_Yes_ ma'am."_

"Oh, don't worry, Francesca, Steffi made damn sure I was thoroughly searched before we left the house. And your slave boy over there doesn't need any green leafy substances either unless it's salad."

"Exactly." She gave Paul a loud whack on the behind "Go get cooking."

"Okay, Jesus. You're a taskmaster, woman."

"No Tabasco sauce or other hot shit of yours," Brian warned. "There's other people here with sensitivities who don't want flames coming out of their asses."

"I know, I just got the same speech from the _senorita _over there. Anyway, steaks in twenty minutes."

As he made his way over to the grill, several women were on the other side of the lawn oohing and ahhing over Steffi's ring.

Paul managed to get a glance. "Jeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesus," he drawled, "you mean _Spanky_ doled out that kind of money? Are you sure that rock is the real deal?"

Steffi shot him a look, pulling back her hand. "It's appraised and insured," she replied smugly.

"Holy hell, that thing had to be at least seven grand. About the only other time I've seen dude put out big bucks is to pay his failed piss test fines. I think you have him settled, Stef. Congratulations."

_Later:_

Settled by food and drink, everyone began enjoying themselves by the time Raymondo had arrived and put on the music.

"Whose idea was it to drag the karaoke machine?" Dallas wondered.

"Matt and Jeff," Raymondo nodded. "They slipped me some extra bucks on top of what Fran paid of my fee."

"Oh, fabulous," Paul said. "Nothing like an evening of drunk karaoke with those two nuts, Kaz, Scotty, Shannon, Carlito, Primo, and Brian, among other people."

"Fran is a good singer," Raymondo replied. "I think she should do a song."

"Oh, Ray, really…." Francesca began

"Yes, please. Better you than a bunch of drunks I used to work with," Paul nodded.

"That's well and good," Dallas agreed, and then looked around, "but where is our happy couple?"

"Last I saw, Steffi was going to the bathroom," Francesca answered. "I didn't see Brian, so God only knows what he's doing."

"I'm going to look for him," Paul volunteered, not letting it be said out loud that his best friend could have sneaked in a couple of joints after all. If that were the case, Francesca would have a stroke if she found out.

He started out in checking all sides of the house, not finding anyone, before going inside. By the time Paul checked the last empty room, he'd heard noise coming from the bathroom.

He sprinted toward the noise, thinking Steffi was in some kind of trouble and was trying to call for help, only to have the shock of his life after finding the bathroom door ajar and the happy couple enjoying some _amore_ time in it.

"Jesus Christ!" Paul cried.

"Who the fuck is out there?" Brian called.

"It's me. People were wondering where you two were. Dude, seriously, if you're going to get down and dirty like that, at least close the door," Paul demanded. "I swear to Christ I do not want to see you screwing your fiancée, and neither would anyone else!"

"Tell anyone about this and I will kill your ass," Brian answered.

"Then get decent and get back outside before Frannie sends the search party." Paul then shuddered a little and went back to the rest of the group.

"Did you find anyone?" Dallas inquired a few minutes later.

"Oh I found them all right," Paul said as they saw the couple emerge from the house, both flushed and satisfied grins on their faces. "And you won't believe where, when and how if I told you."


	33. Chapter 33

**Chapter 33**

"You think this suit would be all right?" Brian asked the week following the barbecue as he inspected himself in the mirror.

Cherry shook her head and made a face. "Brian, get off the weed. Honestly, if you showed up in _that_, Steffi would leave you waiting at the aisle."

"Yeah, maybe you're right. See, this is why I prefer to take chicks shopping for stuff like this instead of Paul."

"Considering some of his eccentric taste in outfits, I can't say I blame you." Cherry then handed Brian something a little more conservative. "Try this one."

He threw it back out. "For fuck's sake, Cherry, I'm getting married, not _buried. _Surely you can do better than that. Jesus, I may as well have brought Paul."

She shook her head, handing something else over the door. "Speaking of The Weird One, what's this about him being considered as Suicide?"

"Don't get too excited, they're looking at other people too, Chris Daniels among them. I don't think they've made the final decision yet; at least I haven't heard anything. Even when they do pick someone, it's only going to be for a few months until Kaz is healed up enough to come back."

"Well, it would be an interesting prospect, whoever they choose."

"Yeah." Brian then paused a moment. "Oh, fucking hell. I knew this shit would happen."

"What?"

"These pants are too long. One short joke out of you, Cherry, and I will come out there and stab your aorta with an ice pick. I get enough of that bullshit from Paul."

"Surely they can't be _that_ bad, are they?"

"No, only seventy miles too fucking long."

"That's why they have something called alterations, Brian," Cherry suggested. "You never thought I had to get things altered to fit my fat ass?"

"And what an ass it is too," Brian praised. "Sim is one lucky guy."

"I'll let him know you approve. So is the rest of that thing all right?"

"Surprisingly, yes." He threw the pants over. "Think you can take those to alterations?"

"I think they would need _you _to go along with them," she replied.

"Jesus Christ. They really need to make a short guys' store. They have them for big and tall men; where's the justice?"

"I'm sure you will be so stunning that Steffi will want to jump your bones."

"She practically does that now, Cherry, where have you been?"

"Doing my own thing. Now will you quit jerking off in there and get dressed so we can get these pants done for you?"

"Okay, Jesus, at least let me zip my fly." He then came out of the dressing room. "Happy now?"

"Thrilled," she grinned.

A clerk approached them, asking if they had made a selection. Cherry nodded, handing over the suit. "He's going to need the pants altered," she added.

"Within the next two weeks," Brian nodded. "I got a big date, if you know what I mean. By the way," he jerked a thumb back toward the dressing area, "there's no toilet paper in there."


	34. Chapter 34

**Chapter 34**

"This movie night was a cool thing, Dallas," Paul grinned. The five of us getting together one of the last few times before Spanky goes off the market. I'm still trying to figure out how some chicks find sexy in a short dude."

"Why do you have to be so evil toward Brian and make fun of his height at every turn?" Francesca scolded. "He's a sweet guy and he and Steffi adore each other. I can bet if he as much as made a 'beaner' joke, you'd cut his head off."

"Eh, don't worry about it, Francesca; he and I have talked shit to and about each other for eight years," Brian came in, grinning, followed by Steffi. "And I'm more than used to short jokes by now to the point I'm immune." He then held up a bag. "I got the movies."

"Great," Dallas smiled back. "Food will be here in half an hour."

"What took you two so long?" Paul wondered. "Did you stop off for a quickie on the way home?" He began inspecting the movies inside the bag.

Francesca whacked him on the head, frowning. "Paul Michael!"

"**OW! **_What?"_

"For one whole day, could you quit being a pig?"

"Not that it's your business, Paul, but I stopped for gas," Brian replied, trying to keep from laughing. "And Stef wanted a Slurpee, so we got some of those too."

"Slurpees? Dude, it's twenty degrees outside."

"And eighty in here," Dallas grinned. "Bring them on."

"Brian, you need to hand over your man card," Paul said. "The Notebook?" He pulled out another DVD. " Harry Potter?" "Titanic?" What the fuck?"

"There are ladies here in case you haven't noticed, Paul," Brian shook his head. "Don't worry, "Behind Enemy Lines," "Pineapple Express," a wrestling documentary, and a couple of kung fu movies are in there too."

"Oh God," Francesca groaned, "as if I don't have to watch enough of that kung fu shit when this one comes over my place." She jerked a thumb at Paul.

"I thought you liked kung fu movies," Paul said with a mock whine.

"In small doses, not twelve-hour marathons," she countered.

"For what it's worth, Steffi wants to see "12 Rounds", so that's in there too."

"Great, another chick wanting to drool over a bad Cena movie," Paul snorted.

"By the way," Steffi boasted, changing the subject. "guess who's going to the Royal Rumble?"

"Aw, come on, sweetheart, this isn't the time to brag," Brian said, turning slightly pink. "It isn't like I'm going to win it anyway."

"Frankly, I couldn't be prouder of you, Spanky," Paul grinned. "You'll have the time of your life."

"That's right," Dallas said, "you were in the 2005 one, weren't you?"

"He was," Brian added. "Remember that sick bump he took when he was eliminated? A lesser dude would have been banged up, but Paul's like Gumby, always flexible and bounces back."

"Yeah, well let's hope you don't get clobbered like that," Paul answered. "But it looks like things are finally happening for you, Midget. First the championship scramble at Unforgiven, and now this."

"Well, don't get too excited; most likely the highest I'll ever reach in any title run will be the US title, and that might be awhile yet."

"It will be worth the wait," Steffi nodded, smiling over at him.

"Aww, I can't resist you when you smile like that," Brian replied, popping in the first movie. He took a seat on the sofa next to Steffi, who wrapped her arms around him and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

"If you two start making out I'm going to leave," Paul said. "Jesus, save some for the wedding night, will you?"

"We got other plans for _that," _Brian joked.

"TMI! TMI!" Paul covered his ears. "Seriously, dude, keep the necking down to a bare minimum."

"Jealous freak," Brian laughed.

"Besides, you have me to make out with," Francesca giggled. "Don't be such a killjoy."

"Well, at least he popped in the kung fu movie first."

They watched it silently for a few moments before Brian and the girls started up a "This is boring" chant.

"Do you idiots mind?" Paul asked. "Some of us would like to watch this."

"There's another DVD player in the den, Paul," Dallas offered. "We can finish it in there."

"If it gets us away from some smart ass _senoritas_ and Rico Suave over there, we can watch this thing in peace."

Brian flipped him off, laughing.

"No thanks, you aren't my type. You must be _this tall _to ride this ride."

"Paul!" Francesca barked.

"Sorry, couldn't help myself."

"He knows he wants my body anyway," Brian replied with a grin. "He's just jealous Stef got it first."

"In your dreams." Paul then took out the movie. "I'll take you up on that other room, Dallas."

"Sure, let me take care of the food order first. I just saw them pull up," Dallas nodded, headed for the front door.

"Hey, Spanky, did you really tell that saleslady at the suit store there was no toilet paper in the dressing room?" Paul asked. "Cherry said something about it, but I couldn't believe it."

"Yeah, I did, and now you owe me fifty bucks on top of the sixty you owed for smoking up my last weed supply. And if anyone should know I have no shame, _vato, _it's you."

"Wait a minute, you guys make weird bets with each other?" Francesca wondered.

"Sure," Paul nodded, "but it's common knowledge that blondie over there will do, say, smoke, and eat just about anything for money."

"Fuck you, Paul. By the way, stay out of my cigarettes, you mooch. Get your own shit."

"You've smoked mine," Paul countered.

"Yeah, but not three quarters of the fucking pack," Brian said.

"While we're still on bets," Paul grinned, "did I ever tell you about the time I bet Bri a hundred bucks he wouldn't hit on the Comcast dude?"

"Oh my God," Francesca said. "Do not tell me what I think you're going to."

"And I did, " Brian laughed. "I even threw in 'daddy' for emphasis. Easiest hundred I ever earned."

"Which you had to give back plus another four hundred for all the porn you ordered on my account."

"Brian!" Steffi gasped.

"Come on, baby, this was long before you and I met. Hell, why order hamburger now when I have filet mignon right in front of me?"

"Which reminds me, Spank, you really need to get all your stroke movies out of the house before you get married. I don't think you'd want your bride there to pull something out of your DVD collection wondering what "Bust My Ass" is about."

Steffi gave Brian a confused look.

"I'll sort through the stuff when I get back next week, Stef. I promise." He glared at Paul. "Dude, you really need to keep your mouth shut sometimes."

"Hey, no skin off my teeth because you mix your porn with the regular DVD's in your living room."

Dallas then came back with the food. "Let's have a break for our dinner," he offered, spreading out containers. "Then we can all vote what the next movie will be."


	35. Chapter 35

**Chapter 35**

After the movie night, the three men had decided to go out and do the town; it wasn't often they saw each other anymore with Brian's own schedule, Paul's indy dates picking up, and of course, the coming wedding. With Steffi now living out in Venice (and, to Dallas' pleasant surprise, was adjusting to her new surroundings very well), Dallas didn't see her very much either, and it was a treat each time everyone was able to get together.

"Morning, sunshine," Dallas grinned the next morning when the other two came in.

"Coffee," Paul groaned. "Now."

"As you wish, Master," Dallas teased, putting a fresh pot in the middle of the table.

"Why the hell are you so cheerful in the morning?" Paul asked. "You were tossing down as many as we were last night."

"Dudes," Brian yawned, "you won't believe the dream I had last night."

"Do enlighten us," Dallas answered.

"This should be good," Paul added.

"No, I had this dream that I hit on this enormous chick with a huge rack," Brian continued. "Thing is, I forgot the name."

"Oh yeah, Betsy the cow," Paul laughed. "I got the phone number of the barn where she's located."

Dallas nearly choked on his coffee. _"What?"_

"You should have stood with us last night, Dallas. See, it started out when I took a piss on this electric fence and nearly fried my dick off."

"Then you would have been known as _Paula _this morning," Brian interjected with a grin.

"Shut up," Paul answered, smacking Brian's head. "Anyway, dipshit here, as we all know was drunk off his ass, climbed under the fence, started chasing around cows and feeling them up asking for milk. I finally had to drag his ass out of there when he got hold of one's utters and kept asking 'Can I get some milk?' Can you imagine poor Stef being left for a _cow? _So is it coming back to you now, Spanky?"

"Oh yeah, laugh it up, Paul. Don't get me started on some of the stupid shit _you've_ done while drunk."

"Hey, why not?" Dallas asked. "I'm all ears."

"Well, the recent bout was when he was visiting his folks down in Texas. So he has this friend down there that was pregnant and a couple dudes mugged her and she lost the kid. Well, being the Mexican gentleman we all know and love, Paul here took matters into his own hands, tracked down one of the dudes, clocked him across the head with a four-slice toaster. Dude calls the cops, the _vato_ here gets put into the police car—may I add that Paul was totally wasted through all this—muttering how much he liked brown cows the whole time. And there is Paul's cow story, since he had to be a smart ass and bring up mine."

"And I hang out with you two _why?" _Dallas gave a hearty laugh.

"We're a fun bunch," Brian nodded, "not to mention I'm marrying your ward."

"Speaking of that, the suit store called your phone earlier," Dallas said. "Your pants are ready."

"About fucking time," Brian replied. "How long does it take to hem a pair of pants? Jesus."

"Bri, what's the rush? The wedding isn't till your birthday."

"Yeah, but we got other shit to do, plus _senor_ here is going to be gone the first week of May and we want to get things wrapped up ASAP before he heads over there and Stef gets out of school for the semester."

"I'm not being the entertainment this time," Paul scoffed. "No way in hell are any of you drawing on me and putting stupid hats on my head."

"Then you better watch your booze, home fries," Brian grinned at him. "Of course, you might be busy trying to molest Francesca anyway."

"No, that would be you and Steffi."

"Some things just can't wait for the wedding." Brian gave a sly wink.

"Where is the bride to be anyway?" Paul asked. "You screw her to death last night or something?"

"Very fucking funny. No, Steffi's still asleep. I didn't even go in with her when we got back last night because she was already in bed and I didn't want to wake her and get cussed out."

"Smart move," Dallas nodded. "You were pretty inebriated anyway."

"Exactly my point. A wasted fiancé is not a good sight. Good thing she had her hearing aids out or we'd all gotten hell for the noise."

"You mean how you stomped upstairs like a team of horses?" Paul asked with a cheesy grin.

"Oh yeah, like you were Mr. Quiet too, _senor. _Probably out of the three of us, Dallas was the quietest."

"Well, I'm a little older than you two," Dallas chuckled. "It's a little more difficult to keep up."

"Speaking of which, since I got to go pick up my pants later, want to go hang at the mall with me and Steffi?"

"Dude, seriously, you need to cough up the man card," Paul said. "You are such a girly man. Shopping isn't a sport; didn't you know that?"

"I better give up my man card too, because I used to go with Steffi all the time," Dallas added.

"Well, yeah, you were interpreting for her. Girly guy here is her booty call."

Brian gave him a whack. "I am not her booty call. It's called _fiancé, _dumb ass. Shouldn't you be calling Francesca or something?"

"Sure, wake her up so she can cut my balls off for interrupting her beauty sleep? I prefer my _wjavos_ attached to me, thanks very much."

"Yeah, God help us all when the day comes that your DNA has multiplied," Brian joked.

"At least they'll be dark and stunning. Yours will probably be goofy looking and short."

"And hopefully blond," a voice came behind them.

"Oh hi, Stef," Paul greeted her. "Wait, you just heard that?"

"I hope so; I have my hearing aids in, silly." She then walked over to Brian for a kiss.

"Hey, no making out at the breakfast table," Paul reminded them.

"The girl can't even give her fiancé a quick kiss?" Dallas laughed.

"Yeah, Paul, stuff a sock in it and go call 'your Frannie.' She's probably thinking you forgot about her by now."

"Okay, but make sure Dallas fills in Steffi about you making out with cows last night."

Brian threw a balled up napkin at him as Paul left the room, laughing.


	36. Chapter 36

**Chapter 36**

_Three weeks later:_

"Nobody told you two where they were going?" Dallas asked during a phone call with Paul. He had been trying to reach Steffi for several days after getting notice she hadn't shown up for her classes as she normally had.

"Well, I know she went on the road with Brian for a few days, but that's all I can tell you outside the fact he didn't come back home on his off days like he usually does."

"This isn't them just to go off like this and not say a word to anyone, especially Stef. She at least will usually text or email me when she's going somewhere for even a _day. _Bri hasn't called you?"

"Nope," Paul replied. "Not even an instant message. I didn't want to say it out loud, Dallas, but I'm worried as hell."

"All I know there better be a good reason for this," Dallas sighed.

"For what it's worth, I checked all the hospitals." Paul said. "I even called the jails in case Brian got picked up for something, you know, weed or some dumb shit. At least it's his week off or I'd have to worry about WWE calling and shitting razor blades. It's not exactly cool to have one of their Rumble participants disappear right before the big PPV."

"You have a point," Dallas agreed. "If you hear anything, let me know, will you? I'll do likewise."

"You want me to do that before or after I kill a certain blond midget and hide the body?" Paul asked. There was no question now that he _was_ more than concerned.

"Preferably before so I can rip him a few new ones before you kill him," Dallas answered. "In any case, let's keep each other updated."

_Meanwhile:_

"Everyone's going to flip out when they get word of this," Steffi said.

"So let them shit themselves. It doesn't mean we won't have a formal ceremony come May. As far as this went, what better time to pull a fast one right before the Rumble? If they can pull fake accidents to draw people to Jeff–which is rather stupid considering Jeffro is talented as hell and making a great champ–but this will really knock them off their feet and draw some spotlight on good old TBK here to boot." Brian gave an evil smile.

"Oh they'll be knocked off their feet all right. Couldn't I at least text Dallas and let him know where we are?"

"Not yet, princess." He kissed her hair. "Let them sit on it at least…..oh, about another hour."

"It's already been three _days," _Steffi reminded him. "And I have to get back to classes sometime."

"Don't worry about it; there's cheat sheets around somewhere. You'll catch up in no time. Meanwhile, Zeke should be back here with dinner in about five minutes, so relax and have a good time with your new mister here."

_That night:_

"God," Dallas groaned. "I don't freaking believe this."

"Yeah," Cherry said. "So who wants first dibs on killing him?"

"Well, I'd say between you and Paul, you'd be the lesser of the two evils."

"What would possess them to run off and do this to begin with?"

"God only knows, but I have a feeling this wasn't Stef's idea. Has anyone contacted Paul?"

"Not a word. Strangely enough, Brian called me first. The little shit."

"This is still shocking me,"

"I think we're all shocked, Dallas. I'd almost hate to see what's going to happen when this gets out."

"Well, in the meantime," Dallas offered, "let me deal with Paul."

_Several minutes later:_

"Dude, what the fuck?!" Paul exclaimed. "He did what? And not a word to anyone? I'm going to kill his ass."

"Yeah, Paul, I guess Steffi and I may have to eat all those deposits," Dallas sighed. "The two of them just eloped last night. Do not ask me why, because I'm lost too."


	37. Chapter 37

**Chapter 37**

"Exactly what kind of gonz were you smoking when you thought of this idea?" Paul asked.

"If you must know, all this was done with both spontaneity and a clear head," Brian replied. "Besides, I've cut down on the weed. I have a new high now." He gestured toward Steffi, who smiled lovingly at him.

"God, and you talk about _me _being the king of cheese."

"Seriously, though, what made you think of this?" Dallas wondered. "And why didn't you say anything?"

"It was kind of a thing between a publicity stunt and either of us not wanting to wait much longer," Brian answered.

"What about the deposits on things for the original date? Those things aren't refundable, you know," Paul said. "Was losing that much money worth being an attention monger for the Rumble?"

"I know all that, dumbass," Brian gave him a dirty look. "As for the 'attention monger' remark, I will have you know Creative loved the idea I pitched. See, they're writing Stef in as a fan I kind of took a fancy to, had Zeke kidnap her for me and we eloped. Of course, on screen, she isn't going to be as willing as she actually was the other night."

"Bri, are you completely insane? Steffi isn't an actress." Dallas replied.

"No, but she won't be on too much, but the times she is, she'll have coaching and directives from the creative flunkeys, not to mention it's good money for her for college. I don't know what you guys are worried about; she loved the idea as much as I did."

"And how exactly are they going to work around….." Dallas began.

"I covered that too," Brian nodded. "I'll not only make sure Steffi has her hearing aids in, but there will be special cues for her. Oh, by the way, she's not going to talk much, so her being hearing impaired won't be written in."

Steffi giggled as he added, "She might get in a whimper or two here and there."

"Okay," Dallas nodded, "but back to what you're doing about the original date."

"I hope you know I already arranged my schedule for _that_ date, Spanky," Paul chimed in.

"Will you two get your jockstraps out of a knot? That will still be our formal date. Nobody knows about that one outside of the important parties, and I'd like to keep it that way, at least until this new storyline is over."

Dallas finally smiled. "I think I can deal with that, especially now there's going to be another star in the family. Where did you come up with this idea anyway?"

"I guess he had to think of something pretty quick, being he's the shortest dude in the Rumble." Paul began to laugh, only to be rewarded with a slap on the head from Brian.

"You want to be knocked out the way Snitsky did to you four years ago, homeboy? Keep pushing me."

"I'd like to see that happen," Paul laughed.

"Good, I'll give Zeke a call and see what day's good for him."

"Just don't share a room with him very often," Steffi spoke up.

"Yeah, he is kind of a scary dude, huh Stef?" Paul asked, still chuckling.

"It isn't that," Steffi shook her head. "He's very nice to me and Brian, but there's sometimes other things."

"Yeah, like having to piss when someone is monopolizing the bathroom trying to drop some friends off at the pool. I went in there to pee one night and the door was unlocked and Zeke's black ass was sitting on the toilet with a magazine, 'I'm in here'! Fucking hell. And Paul used to yell at _me _about leaving the door open when I took a piss."

"Ah yes," Paul nodded. "As if the world wanted to look at your dick and pasty white ass while being exposed to you pissing. Jesus, I almost pity poor Zeke."

"You must have liked it or you never would have looked," Brian shot back playfully. "And Zeke hasn't complained yet."

"Guys," Dallas spoke up. "Lady in the room."

"It's okay, Dallas," Steffi nodded, "I'm used to it by now."

"And now that you married this freaky midget, you better get used to a lot more," Paul grinned. "It's never a dull moment."


	38. Chapter 38

**Chapter 38**

"What the hell is all this smoke?" Francesca cried when she had come in the door after being out of town for a week. "Paul, I swear I am going to kick your ass! Can I not trust you to keep an eye on the house while I was gone without creating a disaster? And I also remember specifically telling you no weed in here!"

Brian prattled out of the kitchen, wearing a full apron and nothing else. "Hey, Paul, have a taste of this…..oh, hi Francesca."

"Oh my God! What are you two doing in my kitchen? And Brian, put some clothes on!" she cried.

"Yeah, dude, it isn't enough you're trying to make me eat your fucking clam chowder," Paul added.

"You're making clam chowder?" Francesca raised an eyebrow.

"An attempt anyway," Brian said, aiming the spoon toward her.

"Yeah, and I'd like to live a long time, thanks very much. I don't want my gravestone saying, 'HERE LIES PAUL LONDON. HE TRIED THE BRIAN KENDRICK'S COOKING.' I suggest you back away from it too, Frannie, if you value your life," Paul warned.

"And I suppose you spicing his noodles with cajun spices not long ago was perfectly fine." Francesca glared at him.

"But _that_ was funny," Paul replied in protest. "But Bri's cooking explains most of the smoke in here."

"Fuck you, Paul; more like you smoking five bowls," Brian responded.

"Paul!" Francesca cried, punching his arm.

"What? I'm telling you, Frannie, eating Brian's cooking is like walking under a guillotine. He should take the apron off and left that shit to me. Hell, he should leave all that homemaker stuff to Steffi. White boy here burns water and can't even make _ice."_

"Oh come on, Paul, don't be such a drama king. This isn't bad." Francesca smiled, "though I would appreciate if you put some pants on while in my kitchen, Brian."

"It came out a little thicker than it should," Brian shook his head. "I will admit you got some kick ass utensils and pans out there, though."

She couldn't help but laugh. "Glad you approve. By the way, where is that lovely bride of yours?"

"Upstairs in the shower," he replied.

"Washing off Brian's funkyness after their last marathon screw session," Paul chimed in. "I mean, come on, one would think it would be the slow and romantic stuff, but today? I was subjected to two hours of dirty talk hell."

"Shouldn't have been eavesdropping, dude," Brian deadpanned.

"How could I _not _hear that shit? They would have heard you clear in China!"

"What's the matter, holmes, jealous I didn't ass rape _you_ instead? By the way, Francesca, there's fresh sheets on the bed ready for you and him to go at it later," Brian replied. "Steffi insisted we make the room immaculate for your return."

"We will go at it after your fat ass gets dressed and leaves," Paul said. "Don't you have to go pack to go to a house show this weekend anyway?"

"Stef already did it before you invited us over," Brian answered.

"So how is she adapting to her upcoming TV role?" Francesca wondered, getting a mug of coffee and flipping on a fan to clear the smoke.

"Better than initially thought. I'm telling you, the woman's a natural, and she's kind of having fun with it. Steffi does admit it's going to be hard to play someone in a 'forced marriage' on camera, though."

"Given the real life circumstances, I'm sure," Francesca nodded.

"She's going to be great; sometimes Stef even have Zeke laughing his ass off, especially the parts where he's supposed to grab and carry her back in the ring when she's trying to sneak away from me. They were supposed to bring in Primo as her rescuer of sorts, but they have a thing going with the Bellas, so there's talk of bringing Jimmy or Scotty up instead. My wife attempting to be rescued by a redneck Asian or a guy in comic book style attire. I fucking love it."

"Better those two than that carnival freak guy," Paul said. "What's his name again?"

"Kizarny," Brian replied, "and I totally agree with you there, dude. I would have suggested Boogeyman, but that guy would scare Satan, and I doubt Steffi would have gone for it. Yeah, Scotty or Jimmy would be a more logical choice, being both dudes don't get much TV time as it is."

"Then again, it would have been fun to see Boogeyman carting you off, stalking Zeke, and covering you both with worms while Stef made her escape," Paul laughed.

"And you wonder why Creative never went with your ideas." Brian shook his head.

"Yeah, you're right, considering the new 'Run Steffi Run' chant is really catching on. Did you see all the stuff on WWE Universe? They even gave your wife her own page. She has like 1,000 people on it already."

"Really?" Brian was intrigued she had her own fan base so soon. "I haven't really looked at my own page, let alone hers. Since I'm under orders to put some pants on, I'll get my laptop while I'm at it. Be right back."

"You can put that apron in the hamper too," Francesca called after him.


	39. Chapter 39

**Chapter 39**

Several weeks had passed and during a visit, Paul had cut his foot at a party. Now as he sat down with a pained look on his face after being scolded by Francesca for having blood tracked in her kitchen, she broke out the first aid kit.

"No, shit, Frannie, not the peroxide!" he cried.

"It's either this or that foot gets infected and you have it cut off," she answered, applying some to the wound. "Don't give me any shit."

"**AHHHHHHH IT BURNS! OWWWW IT BURNS LIKE HELLLLLL! FRANNIE, YOU BITCH! AHHHH!! SOMEONE GET HER AWAY! IT BURNS! IT BURNS! BRIANNN!"**

Brian came into the kitchen, grouchy. "Dude, what the fuck? It's three in the morning; some of us would like to sleep."

"He's being a child about this peroxide," Francesca sighed.

"Jesus, Paul, take it like a man. You're lucky Stef doesn't sleep with her hearing aids or she'd have no problem bitching your ass out before stabbing your aorta with a hot fork."

"How can I when I got her torturing me? Oh wait….it's kind of tingly now. Hey, that feels cool! It's tingly!"

"All that screaming and waking up half the house for nothing," Francesca shook her head, putting on a bandage.

"Hey, look, Bri, Frannie even put a bandage on it. Dig this, I can walk now."

"Yeah, nice. Next time you want to scream bloody murder, take it outside, will you? Jesus, I'd hate to see you having a baby."

His eyes then widened and he bit his lip, a look that wasn't lost on Francesca.

"Something you're trying to say, Brian?" she asked, eyes narrowing.

"Uh….I think I may have said too much already. I'm going back to bed."

"**SPANKY, GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE!" **Paul yelled. "You short shit; you're not dropping hints and then bailing on us!"

"If that is the case, I better go wake up Stef for this at the risk of being neutered."

"Fine, but get back here," Paul repeated.

Several minutes had gone by before they heard Steffi's voice: "I swear to God, Brian, you have the biggest mouth. Couldn't you have waited until morning?"

"I'm sorry, Stef, okay? It slipped when Paul was carrying on like a psycho over a little peroxide on his foot."

" 'Little peroxide' my ass," Paul said. "She dumped half the bottle on me!"

"Well, if you hadn't been piss ass drunk dancing around in your bare feet, you wouldn't have gotten cut in the first place," Francesca shot back.

"Anyway, something about Spanky here letting something slip," Paul replied.

Brian looked at Steffi. "You want to take this one?"

She nodded, finally smiling. "Well, since we were going to tell you two and then call Dallas in the morning anyway, we may as well let the cat out of the bag."

"I'm all ears," Francesca said. "Spill it."

"Well, remember at the taping last week I fainted and they had to do the whole segment over without me?"

"Oh yeah," Paul nodded. "How did that turn out? You okay?"

Brian cleared his throat and then bit down on his knuckles.

Steffi smiled again. "I'm fine, thank you, except being a little bit pregnant."

"Oh my God!" Francesca gasped, hugging her. "That's wonderful!"

"Jesus, you two work fast. You have the official ceremony in three weeks and already you've knocked up the bride, Spank," Paul grinned. "Of course, I shouldn't be too shocked considering all the fucking you two have done lately."

Francesca whacked him on the head. "OW! Frannie, what the hell?" he cried.

"Were you raised by wolves or something?" she glared at him. "Jesus, Paul, do you have to be so crude?"

"What? I was just stating a fact."

"Don't worry about him, Francesca," Brian said, laughing. "I would be worried if the _vato_ there was any other way."

"So when are you due?" Francesca asked Steffi.

"Mid-January, according to the doctor," Steffi answered.

"How scary is that?" Paul joked. "Brian's spreading his DNA. Oh God, little short blond things scampering around." He gave a mock shudder.

"Yeah dude, watch and learn," Brian grinned back. "I'll be teaching it how to attack smart asses like you, especially if it's a boy."

"That is going to be one interesting household. Hey, let's call Dallas!"

"Dipshit, it's six in the morning back East. He'll fucking cuss us out."

"No he won't," Steffi spoke up. "He's usually awake at five on the weekdays to be into work at seven. You might still catch him before he leaves."

"Good, let's give him a call then," Brian suggested, going for his phone, then punching in a number.

"**OH MY GOD," **Paul yelled. **"MY ASS IS VIBRATING!"**

"Oops, sorry, Paul," Brian said with a wicked grin. "Pushed the wrong speed dial."

"You did that on purpose." Paul shot him a dirty look.

"It was an accident, I swear." Brian barely kept himself from laughing.

"Serves you right for having your phone in your back pocket," Francesca said.

"Anyway, now that I had my fun, Stef and I have a call to make. Come on, _poco madre, _we have some good news to spread."


	40. Chapter 40

**Chapter 40**

"I don't believe this," Dallas said. "Are you sure?"

"I went to a doctor after I passed out," Steffi replied. "They took blood and made me pee in this cup and did some other stuff on me. Everything turned out okay except the blood and pee tests said I was pregnant."

"Honey, why didn't you use something?"

"What's the difference now? We got married, and besides, the last time I suggested it, the rubber broke," Steffi said. "Maybe that's what happened ."

"Are you really ready for this, though? I thought Bri wanted to hold off until he either had a lighter schedule or quit altogether."

"Well yeah, but I guess some plans change."

"But you're feeling all right? Do you need me to do anything?" Dallas asked.

"I'm fine and anything I do need, Papa will be happy to arrange it."

"Damn right!" Brian yelled in the background. "Hi, Dallas!"

"Well, someone sounds cheerful," Dallas laughed.

"He's been giddy since the doctor's report came back. Of course, maybe now my new mother in law will shut up about a grandchild."

"I'm presuming you told her," Dallas guessed.

"Of course…..well, actually Brian did, but still."

"**PAUL! **Get your tanned ass outside with that cigarette!" Dallas heard Brian yell in the background again. "I swear to Christ you will not be smoking around my pregnant wife or the kid. _Capisce?"_

"This coming from a guy with a four pack a day habit," Paul grunted.

"Don't fuck with me, Paul. Outside."

"All right, quit shoving me. _Oquela."_

Steffi giggled at the exchange. "That's the Italian daddy coming out of him," she explained to Dallas.

"He's just looking out for you, honey," Dallas answered.

"Yeah, you could say that," Steffi agreed. "Problem is now, if this is a girl, she better be prepared to be locked up by her father from the time she gets breasts until she's eighty."

"Right again!" Brian called. "And if my little girl does land a hot boyfriend, I get to go to bed with him first!"

"What the hell?" Dallas was taken aback.

"He's joking, Dallas, relax." Steffi laughed again. "Typical Brian."

"Yes, he's typical all right," Dallas chuckled. "Now what about your storyline?"

"They're making changes now," Steffi answered. "The plan is to write me out before I start to show. They won't even be having Zeke carrying me around anymore. The plan is that Jimmy and Scotty will have a match with them and while one defeats Bri and knocks him out, the other will somehow be able to knock Zeke out with one thing or another. Word has it that they may add in Hunter for good measure. Anyway, while they're knocked out, Jimmy and Scotty will spirit me away backstage and into the sunset."

"Ahh, the perfect rescue story," Dallas said.

"I think it's pretty awesome," Steffi agreed. "But it's going to be one of those 'hurry up and get it done' kind of things for obvious reasons. The good news is, after I have the baby, I'll be coming back. That time, the plan is for me to turn on my rescuers because I have fallen in love with the person I was 'forced' to marry."

"You're going heel too?"

"That's what they're considering, Dallas."

"I'm going to have to keep an eye out for this. But just remember, even though you're clearly enjoying this, just remember being a mom is going to be important too."

"Of course it will," Steffi responded. "Above all else, nothing will be more important than my husband and our child."


	41. Chapter 41

**Chapter 41**

"How can someone carrying some short thing be showing already?" Paul asked a few months later, noticing Steffi's expanding middle. The official wedding ceremony had been several weeks before (with plenty of dogging on Brian for turning thirty), and now the focus was on the coming baby.

"This is about the time she's _supposed _to be showing, dumb ass," Francesca said. "Didn't your mother teach you about stuff like this?"

"Maybe," he said. "Not that I paid attention."

"That's because most of the time Paul here was too busy most of the time savoring the fine taste of Palmolive his _mami_ would dump in his mouth for using dirty language," Brian laughed.

"And still does to this day," Paul replied, "only she's graduated to dishwasher soap tablets. God help anyone who drops the F bomb in _that _house."

"She also still smacks him upside his head," Brian continued.

"You mean like this?" Francesca gave Paul a playful whack.

"Ow! Bitch, don't be doing that shit. I just got my hair decent."

"Call me a bitch again and I'll follow your mom's example by getting the dish soap."

"Okay……you win."

Brian made sounds that were similar to whipping, getting a filthy look from his best friend.

"Fuck you, Brian," he said.

"Nice for you to offer, buddy, but I have a wife now, remember?"

"Well, seeing her present condition, that's plainly obvious."

Now it was Steffi's turn to smack Paul on the head. "You're rotten," she said.

"What the fuck is this, Whack Paul Upside the Head Day?"

"Well, being that you asked…." Brian replied, getting in a whack of his own.

"Anyway," Francesca cut in, "how did it go at the doctor, Stef?"

Steffi nodded, smiling. "All is good so far. And…..it's a little girl."

"Oh God," Paul groaned jokingly, "a _female_ Brian. As if the original isn't bad enough."

"Hey," Brian spoke up, "don't be bagging on my kid. _La mia figlia sarà bella _just like her mama."

"What did he just say?" Paul was lost.

"His daughter will be beautiful," Steffi said. "It's Italian."

"Dude, can't you speak English like normal people? We're in America, remember?"

Brian looked at him. "Well, you have no problem confusing me with that Spanish shit of yours."

"Yeah, but I was to the Mexican born," Paul replied smugly. "You're a white boy."

"With Italian and Russian ancestors. You got a problem with that, _ragazzo?"_

"_Oquela," _Paul responded. _"Un qué muchacho blanco articulado elegante."_

"I rest my case," Brian concluded.

Steffi put her hands to her stomach, a strange look on her face.

"Honey, are you okay?" Francesca asked with concern.

A smile came to Steffi's face. "Moving."

Brian sprung to attention. "What's moving?"

She took his hand. "The baby. Feel."

"Wow, you guys should check this out," he said, gently putting his hand all over Steffi's middle. "It's like…..freaking _awesome."_

"Uh, no thanks, I'll pass," Paul cleared his throat. "I'm not big on feeling up other dude's wives, especially with my own girlfriend present."

Francesca smacked him on the head again. "Quit being such a doofus. I think this is one time I won't mind in the least."


	42. Chapter 42

**Chapter 42**

"Dude, what the fuck are you reading?" Paul asked. "You've been engrossed in that shit for almost an hour; something that good better have naked pictures."

Brian looked up and glared at him. "Will you get your mind off your dick for a whole day? It happens to be a classic book by Dr. Spock, _Baby and Child Care. _It's one of the biggest best sellers of all time, and Lord knows I need all the help I can get with Stef having this baby."

"Wait, isn't Dr. Spock the dude on _Star Trek?"_

"That's _Mr. _Spock, dumb ass." Brian rolled his eyes. "Dr. Benjamin Spock was a world famous pediatrician."

"Wow, you really are into this whole baby shit, aren't you?"

"Yeah, I spent last night at with Steffi Lamaze too."

Paul broke out laughing, falling off the couch and literally rolling on the floor. "Oh my God….Oh my God!" he howled. "Spanky in Lamaze class! I never thought I'd see the day. Oh, the visions in my head right now!" He laughed louder.

"Yeah, yeah, laugh it up, buddy boy, and let's see who is more prepared when she goes into labor without tossing one's cookies." Brian threw a cushion at him, hitting Paul square in the face and stopping the laughing cold.

"Dude, that was cruel," Paul said.

"Not as cruel as having _la madre piccola _going Jack Bauer on your ass if she was here. Those pregnancy hormones can be wicked, you know. All I said the other night was she looked tired and nearly got stabbed in the aorta with a fork."

"I don't even think I'm going to ask about the sex part in that case," Paul shuddered.

"Uh, yeah, let's just say I avoid that at present and let her come to me. Think of the black widow spider."

"You know black widows eat their mates after sex, right?" Paul asked.

"So far, I've been lucky." Brian went back to his book. "Then there's other things. When she isn't pissing every ten minutes, she breaks out crying when someone much as says 'hi' to her. I'm not going to hell; I'm already there. Thank Christ for being on the road, otherwise, they'd have me in a straitjacket and locked in a padded room at the hoo hoo hotel."

"Jesus, remind me to get a vasectomy," Paul replied.

"You'd be better off, man. Jesus, I can't wait until she has this kid so I can get rid of this demon woman and have my sweet Steffi back. I guess the bottom line is I have no idea when I'll be getting some again. I guess in the meantime, it will Mary Hand and Her Five Ugly Daughters."

"Ain't like you haven't done _that_ before," Paul shrugged.

Brian slapped his head.

"What? Isn't that where _Spanky _originated from?"

"Paul, seriously, come on. This stuff's rough to get used to."

"Next time, use stronger rubbers, dude, not that five buck shit from the dollar store."

"Very fucking funny. I got a match in a few minutes. Think your round ass can stay back here until I'm done?"

"Hey, if you're buying dinner later, I'll stay here and dance the hoochie coochie buck naked."

"Goodbye, Paul," Brian groaned, making his way out front.


	43. Chapter 43

**Chapter 43**

Brian had been home a few days later, enjoying having friends over. He had made the effort to remind people to keep it down since Steffi was napping upstairs. The last thing he needed was another tirade by the Pregnant Wife from Hell.

"Trust me, the woman may have hearing problems, but when she does pick up noise and gets pissed off, she'd scare Satan," Brian added.

The group finally left around four, and now he had Steffi across from him, glaring. In spite of his warnings, the chatter and laughter earlier had woken her; apparently, she'd forgotten to remove her hearing aids before lying down.

Brian gave her a questioned look. "Now what did I do, fart in the wrong direction?"

She said nothing, using sign language instead.

"Stef, you realize I know sign language, right? If you're going to cuss at me, do it in English. I'm a big boy and can handle it."

"Then here is one you should know very well," she replied, flipping him off.

There was no point arguing, and whatever was wrong, for some reason, she resented him for it. Nevertheless, at the risk of being stabbed with the first object Steffi could reach, Brian cut to the chase.

He sat beside her. "Stef, what's wrong? Is it the baby?"

She shook her head.

"Then what's the matter? You've been moody for the last two weeks."

"Have you been drinking?" Steffi asked.

"No." Brian then backpedaled. "Okay, three beers."

Steffi gave a low growl.

"Since when does my having a few beers bother you? You never minded before. You don't even care about my smoking as long as I go outside."

"You're drunk."

"I am not drunk."

"You've been awfully nice to me after all the yelling I've been doing. Did you take those extra shows just to get away from me? Am I that revolting now?"

"What? No! Jesus, Stef, you know someone was injured and they needed a replacement. I can't always make decisions on this shit. And no, you are not 'revolting', but absolutely beautiful."

"It's lonely here," she whined. "I don't know many people, and most of them are _your _friends anyway. And Dallas is back East. Then the other day, I took a bus somewhere and got lost. It took me two hours to get the right one back home because nobody could understand me. I hate it here by myself."

He thought a moment. "Is that why you've been so down lately?"

Steffi nodded. "Nobody really understands me the way you and Dallas do. Even at school, people stare like I'm some kind of freak. Haven't they ever seen a pregnant woman before?"

Brian got an idea. "You have a semester break coming, right?"

"Yeah, in three weeks. Why?"

"Steffi, if you feel well enough, would you like to come with me to a few shows? I think a change of environment may do you some good."

She perked up. "You mean it?"

"Only if the doctor says it's okay," Brian stressed.

"I can get a check up next week," she nodded, her mood clearly changing for the better for the first time in two weeks. "I'm sorry for being such a hellion. I'll try to do better."

"Sweetheart, you're pregnant. You're bound to be going through a lot of things."

Steffi couldn't help but smile. "Why are you so understanding? Not that I am complaining, of course. And I really don't mind the beer thing as long as you don't drive."

"Stef, come on, I'm going to be a dad. Do you honestly think I would be that stupid?" He rubbed her stomach. "I have to be here for my girls, after all."


	44. Chapter 44

**Chapter 44**

Backstage, out of earshot of most women, it wasn't uncommon for some of the men to bitch about wives and girlfriends. For the most part, though Steffi had been a pain in the ass the last couple of weeks, now that Brian knew why, he was a little more tolerant of it.

It couldn't have been easy carrying another little life around for nine months, much less having to stay home alone most of the time in a town which she had little to no familiarity.

_Hell, _Brian thought, _if I were in that position, I'd be bitchy toward me too. Think about it, Brian; you had the **easy** part in all of this._

But today during the usual snipe fest about women, Brian couldn't help but brag.

"Bet your women don't have a talent mine does," he grinned to some of the other guys.

"Yeah?" one of them asked. "And what might that be?"

"Any of your women know how to cuss you out in American Sign Language?"

The whole room broke out in laughter.

"Are you kidding?" another wondered. "Your old lady cusses you out in _sign language? _Of course, seeing her condition, she must do other things in sign language too."

"Ha ha ha, very freaking amusing. Dudes, Steffi's almost deaf, not stupid. Shit, she's so smart, she scares the fuck out of me sometimes. Her GPA at school this past semester was 3.9. Made the damn dean's list, pregnant and all. I couldn't be prouder of her."

At that moment, Steffi had been right outside the doorway; she couldn't hear well about what was happening, but she was at an angle where she could clearly read Brian's lips and couldn't help but smile.

_He's proud of me, _she thought to herself. _Steffi, here you are all huge and hideous and there is your own husband bragging about you._

She walked away before anyone spotted her, going back near the monitors to claim a good spot before the show started, even though it was common knowledge to clear an area for her so she could see and hear everything clearly.

Steffi had felt a little crampy off and on all morning, but it appeared to have finally passed. She'd had them off and on the last couple of days, but Steffi had attributed it to stress and mentioned it to no one; she figured Brian had enough to worry about anyway and wasn't going to bother him with some petty detail. It had been enough she'd been moody toward him the last couple of weeks.

_Later that night:_

Brian had come backstage after his match, and after showering and changing, looked around for Steffi. Knowing she wasn't usually one to wander off without telling someone and wary of most strangers, he was concerned and went to search anywhere she could be.

He'd just come from the catering area when Vickie caught him. "There you are!"

"Yeah, here I am. What's happening?"

"I've been looking for you. They took your wife to the ER a little while ago."

"What? Why didn't someone say something when I came back here from my match? What the hell happened?"

"Someone found her in the restroom doubled over and bleeding a little bit. EMS took her to the nearest hospital."

"Oh God." Brian raked a hand through his hair, fearing the worst. "Which one?"

Vickie told him. He nodded, trying to stay calm. "That's only five minutes from here. Look, I'm grabbing my shit and headed over there now. I'll call someone when I know anything."

_An hour later:_

Brian paced the ER waiting room, both nervous and annoyed, going in and out to have a cigarette every five minutes. Why wasn't anyone telling him what was going on back there? It was bad enough he had to repeat his and Steffi's own names a few times to the idiot at the desk when he arrived. Jesus, these people would have screwed up a one car parade!

A doctor finally appeared and beckoned him. _Jesus, _Brian thought, _about fucking time!_

"What's going on? What happened?" His anxiety level was at an all time high, even after smoking nearly half a pack of cigarettes in the past hour.

"We've stabilized Stefanie, but we will need to keep her overnight just to make sure everything is all right," the doctor reassured him.

"How's the baby?" Brian asked slowly.

"Luckily, we haven't seen any sign of a serious problem," the doctor answered. "There was some minor bleeding, but it's best we observe her tonight and then she follow up with her own doctor as soon as possible."

"Her ass is going as soon as we get home," Brian reassured him. "May I see her now?"

The doctor nodded. "Of course. Follow me; I can take you to her."

He was led to the exam room where Steffi lay. Spotting Brian, she looked up and smiled weakly. "Hi."

"Hey. What are trying to do, scare ten years off my life? Sweetheart, why didn't you tell me what was going on?"

"I didn't want you to worry and I was going to call for an appointment when we got back home anyway," Steffi replied. "You have enough to think about."

He placed a hand on her stomach and pressed his forehead to hers. "Stef, until you pop this kid, I'm going to do nothing _but _worry, so one more thing wouldn't have killed me. Now, they're keeping you tonight just to make sure everything is okay, and then I'm dragging your ass to that doctor when we get back home. _Capite?"_

"Yes." Steffi yawned. "So how was your match?"

_Oh this is interesting, _Brian thought, chuckling. _She goes into crisis with the kid and she wants to know how **my** night was_. "Great," he answered.

"We're going to have an extended stay if they're keeping me overnight," Steffi explained.

"No big deal; that's why I usually pack extra, in case of emergency. Besides, I'm off the next few days, remember?"

"Oh right. Sorry, I'm kind of in a fog from the stuff they gave me."

"It's perfectly fine, Stef. The important thing right now is that you and the baby are okay."

"You better call home," she reminded him. "I don't want anyone sending out the National Guard to hunt us down otherwise. You know how Paul gets when he can't track you down for twenty minutes, let alone a whole day."

"Good idea," Brian agreed before a nurse came in to take Steffi upstairs. "While I'm at it, I'll get hold of Dallas too, just to let him know you're going to be okay, if nothing else."


	45. Chapter 45

**Chapter 45**

When Steffi was released the next morning, they had gone back to the hotel, where Brian immediately ordered her to bed.

"But I was in bed all night at the hospital," she protested.

"And you're going there now," he replied, pulling back the comforter. "Get in."

"I don't know what the worry is. They said everything was fine before I was discharged this morning."

"With orders to rest, Steffi. Into bed right now, _madre piccola."_

"My God, you're being terribly demanding today," she sighed, climbing in. "But I guess since I'm the reason we're stuck in Indianapolis an extra day, it wouldn't hurt."

"Aw, sweetheart," Brian softened, "it's not your fault. Shit happens; it's not like this was something that could be planned. Of course, it isn't as warm as Venice, but I've dealt with worse. And just think," he grinned at her while placing the phone within her reach and handing over the TV remote, "you can have all your meals in bed and me as your personal slave for a whole day."

Steffi couldn't help but giggle a little. "Well, if you insist. I think your daughter agrees too, because she just kicked."

"I'm taking that's a good sign she's okay."

She nodded. "Me too, but I did get an 'all clear' this morning."

"You're still going to the doctor after we get back to Venice," Brian insisted.

"Of course," Steffi agreed.

"That and I have a surprise for you."

She looked at him with renewed interest. "What?"

"Stay right here."

Brian then disappeared into the corridor, returning a few minutes later, returning with Dallas, who grinned at her.

"How did you…."she began.

"I called him from the hospital last night," Brian explained. "He insisted on coming."

"And I brought some friends along," Dallas added before he stuck his head outside the door. "Okay, guys, come on in!"

"Hello, _Mami!" _Paul cried, dragging in Francesca with him. "We have come to entertain you."

"More like you wouldn't have even bothered to get your lazy ass out of bed if Dallas hadn't insisted on paying for the trip," Francesca countered.

"Nice to hear you're still a mooch, Paul," Brian laughed. "What do you have there?"

Paul held up a bag. "Movies. I figure if we're going to party in the room, do it right. Watch a few flicks, get room service. So what will it be, Stef? Pickles and ice cream?"

"Right, and the bill comes to me," Brian nodded.

"In that case, the little mama over there should order lobster."

Steffi began to laugh. "I don't like lobster."

"Let's just order pizza and be done with it. You up for some, Stef?" Brian asked.

She nodded. "No anchovies."

"Pop in a movie, man," Dallas said.

Paul grabbed the first movie in the bag and popped it in. Everyone settled in and ate their food and watched the screen as movie trailers began to play. Meanwhile, the pizza had come and they had all settled down to eat and enjoy the movie.

Things had gone well so far until a gory murder scene began. Steffi went pale, hiding her face in Brian's shoulder.

"Dude, come on," he scolded. "Why did you get this one? We got a pregnant lady here that just spent a night of hell in the hospital and nearly lost our kid. She doesn't need her pizza making a reappearance too."

"Oh come on," Paul whined. "It's just getting to the best part."

"Off, Paul," Brian repeated, glaring at him.

"Seriously, man, this is putting _me_ off my dinner," Dallas spoke up. "I can't even begin to imagine what it's doing to Steffi over there."

"Are you all right, Steffi?" Francesca asked after whacking Paul on the head. He glared back at her, rubbing the spot.

"I will be fine," Steffi replied. "Sorry guys."

"Don't worry about it," Francesca reassured her. "Paul can watch that shit in his and Dallas' own room."

"I doubt that," Dallas quipped. "He'll be too busy ordering porn!"

"_One_ fucking time!" Paul protested. "I thought you weren't bringing that up again!"

"Let me guess, Dallas," Brian began to laugh. "You walked in and caught him stroking to it."

"Fuck you, Spanky," Paul spat.

"Dude, how many times do I have to remind you I'm a married man and you're not my type?"

"Yeah, try convincing these people of that, taking into consideration you used to grab my ass in the locker room."

"It was a joke!"

"Keep telling yourself that, short ribs."

"I got to piss," Brian announced, getting up. "Pop in the next movie and keep an eye on madre piccola here. And no more gory shit, Paul."

Steffi eyed him lovingly and then turned back to the others. "What other movies you have?"

Paul dug in the bag, pulling out one at random. "Next we have…._How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days. _Dallas, what the hell?"

"We have ladies present," he explained.

"And my husband doesn't mind those kind either," Steffi added with a smile. "That and thinking I'm perfectly fine in my present state even though I'm totally hideous. He was even at the hospital all night after having a match."

"Wow, imagine having a guy like that," Francesca nodded. "Lucky girl."

"She just loves teasing Spanky," Paul replied. "I mean, look, ever since she's gotten pregnant, her butt and boobs got bigger and I see the way she throws them his face." He smiled at Steffi. "You just love to drive the man crazy and twirl him around your little finger."

"That's right," Steffi replied with a smug look.

Brian came back out and rejoined her on the bed, Steffi laying her head on his shoulder as they began to enjoy the next movie.

Once it was over, Paul dragged out a scrapbook. "Okay," he said, opening it up. "Stef might especially enjoy this. It's a book of old pictures of her old man I've had around and we're going to play Guess the Look. Kind of like picture captions, only out loud."

"Dude, what the fuck?" Brian asked.

"Come on, Spanky, we used to do this shit on the road all the time with people's pictures."

"This might be fun," Dallas grinned. "Count me in."

"Me too," Francesca said. Steffi smiled and nodded.

Paul then held up the first one. "You have to guess what he might be thinking, anything from getting him away from psycho fans, he's stoned, or he's gassy. Anything you like to guess. Of course the gassy look may followed by a loud fart."

"No, that would be _you, _Paul," Brian countered. "Being in the same room with you was like sleeping with an air horn. And don't get me started on your sneezing. Jesus Christ."

"Oh right," Paul said. "Mine were loud and smell like air and Brian's were the ones that were silent and smelled like something crawled up his ass and died."

Dallas and Francesca looked at each other. "Do we really need to know this?"

"So yeah," Paul continued, displaying a picture of Brian holding a large snake. "What is dude thinking in this one."

"Get it the fuck off of me, that's what," Brian said. Steffi giggled and he glanced at her. "What?"

"Considering it's common you're afraid of just about all animals, I was going to guess that," she replied.

"You're not helping here, _madre piccola."_

She gave him a hug. "I still love you, Brian."

She then smiled over at the others. "And thanks all of you for coming. You've made this day for me a lot better. Hold up the next picture, Paul. I may be good at this yet."


	46. Chapter 46

**Chapter 46**

Steffi was sick of it.

Though she had followed up with her doctor two days after she and Brian had returned to Venice a couple of weeks ago, Steffi was now starting to get annoyed with total strangers coming up to touch her swollen belly and making cutesy comments.

It was one thing when Brian would give her tummy rubs and blow raspberries on it–that was to be expected from _her own husband _after all–but having total strangers patting her was totally ridiculous.

Steffi had been totally grouchy when she had come home Wednesday afternoon from getting her latest sonogram, a look that wasn't lost on Brian. He'd just finished on the treadmill and pulled the iPod buds out of his ears upon spotting her.

"What's the matter, Stef?" he asked.

"I swear to God if one more person tries to rub my stomach and make comments, they'll be lucky to get their hands back," she snapped. "What am I, Aladdin's lamp or something?"

"Sweetface, that's going to be a normal reaction to anyone that sees someone in your condition," he reassured her. "People love pregnant women. The sight of someone carrying a little life is beautiful. _You're_ beautiful, even more so now that your ass has filled out more since you got pregnant."

"Brian, this is not the time for your jokes," Steffi shook her head.

"Who said anything about joking? You better not even _think _of shrinking that thing after you have the baby."

"Thank God I only have to put up with this two more months."

"Speaking of which, how did the sonogram go?"

"Everything looks good. Whatever caused me to bleed and cramp up a couple of weeks ago, apparently, it had no effect on the baby, at least what they could see."

"Ahh, good news, especially now that you're coming into the home stretch." He reached out to pat her belly.

"Don't even," Steffi warned.

"What, not even a hug from your mister?" he asked.

"Not until you clean up; you're all smelly and funky."

"Gee, _madre piccola_, and here I thought you were madly in love with my manly scent."

"Not with that funk. Jesus, Brian, go take a shower. It's nauseating."

"As you wish, _me amano."_

"And don't be singing on top of your lungs in there. I don't want the neighbors calling the animal cops again thinking it's cats mating."

"Oh yeah, that was embarrassing as fuck. I'll keep it down this time." He kissed her cheek.

"Go," she said, fanning the air and cringing.

"All right," Brian grinned, "but be warned, I'm prepared to be your love slave once I'm finished hanging out with the guys later."

Steffi laughed and gave him a playful shove before he headed to the bathroom. For some reason, no matter what kind of mood she would always be in, Brian always found a way to make her feel better.

_Later:_

"Hey, I see the old ball and chain let you out," Paul teased when Brian joined the group.

"Funny you should say that, dude, considering Francesca must have let you off your leash too," Brian countered, causing the others to laugh.

"Oh, aren't we the funny guy today. Seriously, what excuse did you use to get out of the house?"

"The truth," Brian replied. "You might want to try it sometime. And if you refer to Steffi as the ball and chain again, I'll rip your head off and use the hole that remains as an ashtray."

Paul laughed again, making whipping sounds and gesturing as if he had a riding crop in his hand. It prompted Brian to pull out his phone and punch in keys.

"What the fuck are you doing?" Paul asked.

"Texting Sim and Francesca," Brian replied with an evil grin. "I thought both of them would like to be informed about the way you were ogling Cherry the other day."

"Dude, man, don't be doing that!" He grabbed for Brian's phone, causing Brian to pull away and laugh. "Spanky, come on, all I did was comment on her tits. It isn't like I was going to jump her or anything."

"Who's pussy whipped now?" Brian grinned. "If I didn't know any better, I think you'd be more afraid of Francesca racking your balls than the damage Sim could do."

Paul's cell phone began to ring and he groaned seeing the number on his caller ID.. "Hey, Frannie, what's up, gorgeous?"

He listened, rolling his eyes. "Whatever you want to make for dinner is fine with me. Hell, slap some tuna and mayonnaise together for all I care. Just pick whatever you like and I'll eat it." He groaned loudly. "Do I _have_ to?"

The last exchange caught Brian's interest, and he pulled out his own phone to sneak in some video. Paul was too engrossed with his phone call to see what Brian was doing or hearing the snickers around them.

Paul mumbled something unintelligible into the phone, but it must of not been to Francesca's satisfaction because Paul had rolled his eyes again and sighed.

"All right! _Oquela," _Paul yelled. "_Sabes que, Papi del azúcar ama a su pequeño Mami! _Happy now?"

He then slammed the phone shut and stuffed it back into his pocket. "Fucking hell. Women," he groaned.

Brian began to howl with laughter; his Spanish may have been rusty at best, but he understood the last exchange. "Isn't that cute? He just said Sugar Daddy loves his Little Mommy."

"**SPANKY, SHUT UP!" **Paul bellowed.

Brian was now unable to stop himself from laughing hysterically, holding up the video. "Just in case you deny it later," he grinned wickedly.

"Give me that, you miserable little person!"

"No, I think I'll keep it to show the _madre piccola _when I get home. She might get a laugh out of it."

"Show that to anyone and rest assured your coming daughter will be an only child," Paul sneered.

"Sucks to be you," Brian said. "Now maybe you'll think twice before calling someone else pussy whipped."


	47. Chapter 47

**Chapter 47**

The last two months went by quickly, and there was no doubt in anyone's mind that Steffi was hugely pregnant. She was due at any time and a few had commented that she'd looked as if she had "dropped."

"Question is," Brian wondered one afternoon, "if she does have this kid, one, will I be home, and two, _where_ will she decide to have it?"

Cherry shook her head. "I don't think she will have any say when or where it will be born. It just happens."

"Fantastic. Thanks for _that_ reassurance."

"I was just stating a fact," she said.

"Yeah, well. I guess I shouldn't worry, though; Dallas is staying with us temporarily until Stef has the baby. You know, in case it happens while I'm gone. I trust him pretty well, because my rotten luck, Paul would pass out in the delivery room. He screams like a girl at the sight of a tiny _spider. _I can't imagine him in with a woman having a baby."

"Me neither," Cherry agreed. "Dallas was definitely the more reliable choice."

"Not only that," Brian replied. "He's been with Stef for a long time and of course the doctor knows she has hearing problems. More than likely she won't have her hearing aids in and Dallas can interpret what's going on to both parties."

"Hey, you're right. That was good thinking on your part, Papa."

"Ah, to think my little girl is almost here," he said dreamily.

"Why do I have a feeling that little girl will be spoiled rotten?" Cherry asked laughingly.

"Who, by me? Naaahhhh. I'll be a good _papà."_

"Mhm. More like you'll spoil and Steffi disciplines."

"Anyway," Brian continued, "_madre piccola _made out like a bandit at the baby shower last week. She got a whole shitload of baby clothes and a year's worth of diapers, among other things."

"Oh? And what did you get?" Cherry teased.

"I guess the next couple of years of changing shitty diapers and two a.m. feedings. Oh, and some gift cards from the guys. There's even one to a strip club."

"That's practical," Cherry teased.

"Don't think I won't use it one of these days," he teased back.

"More like you'll end up giving it to Paul. Come on, Bri; I know you better than that. First, you're too devoted to Steffi, and second, even you've said the garden variety strip club girls are too skinny for your taste."

"Yeah," Brian nodded. "Not enough ass. And besides, why look at hamburger when I have filet mignon at home?"

"Exactly," she smiled. "So is she feeling all right?"

"A few back pains the day or so, but other than that, Steffi's doing pretty good. I told Dallas to keep her ass in bed as much as possible and call me the minute something happens."

Just then, his phone rang. It was Dallas.

"Buddy, I think you better shift ass to the hospital," Dallas said without greeting. "Stef just went into labor."

_Several hours later:_

Paul woke in the waiting room and yawned. "Is it here yet?"

"God, you sound like a kid saying 'Are we there yet?' No, nobody's heard anything," Francesca replied.

"Where's Dallas?" he asked, looking around. "Jesus, he isn't back there with Spanky, is he?"

Zeke shook his head. "He's out at the smoking hut having a cigarette."

"Hell, I may join him for one as long as this shit is taking. "It's been six hours already. How long does it take for a chick to pop out a kid anyway?"

"It depends," Francesca replied. "We could be here all night for all we know."

"In that case, Dallas and I could smoke a whole pack," Paul replied, getting up.

"Remind me to make an appointment for your vasectomy," Francesca quipped. "I'd hate to see how you act when your own wife has kids."

"Which is why I ain't getting married. If Brian comes out, let me know." He waved and went off to the smoking hut to join Dallas.

Cherry showed up with coffee shortly after. "Cafeteria was closed, guys, so I had to raid the vending machine. Sorry."

"Hey, as long as it's hot and hits the spot, who cares?" Zeke said, taking one.

"Good, I got some junk food too. Anything on Stef?"

"Nothing yet," Francesca answered. "Paul and Dallas went to smoke."

"I'm really worried," Cherry said. "It's been an awfully long time. Shouldn't one of us be checking on them?"

"Not to worry," Zeke reassured them. "The little man is back there with her."

"Right, and for all we know, he may have passed out. Have you seen the fathers on TV in delivery rooms?"

"Cher," Francesca spoke up, "we're talking about a man who sits with Paul through the bloodiest and goriest horror movies _cracking jokes _the entire time. I doubt he's going to be affected much with his own wife having a baby."

_Four hours:_

"Well, if nothing else, we got to see a Venice sunrise," Francesca said. "But still no baby."

"Dallas, go back and see what the fuck is taking so long," Paul spoke up. "I mean come on, _ten hours? _Jesus, is she giving birth to quadruplets or something? Surely she can't be having that hard of a time popping the spawn of a blond midget."

"Never mind," Dallas jerked his thumb toward the back hallway. "Here comes said midget."

"About the hell time. Jesus. I guess someone can wake Zeke over there now before he vibrates the foundation with that snoring."

"Nah, leave him alone," Dallas grinned. "We've been here all night; a rest is in order. So Daddy," he said to Brian, "how did it go?"

Brian had a dreamy look in his eye. "Totally beautiful. Unbelievable."

"Dude, did you sneak out to take a hit off some gonz or something?" Paul asked.

Francesca smacked him on the head, glaring.

"What? He's got a weird look on his face like he's stoned or something."

"I'm just high on life," Brian said. "Stef and the baby are great. Her name's Audrey. She's this long," he stretched out his hands, "and a little over seven pounds. Oh, I got to cut her cord and she's got this pale fuzz on her head."

"God help us," Paul laughed, "another blond midget."

This time, Cherry smacked his head. "Will you stop with the short jokes?"

"It's fine, Cherry," Brian said, going over to nudge Zeke awake. "Hey, big guy. Wakey, wakey."

Zeke woke with a start. "Huh?"

"Steffi had a baby girl," Brian grinned at him.

"Already?"

"What do you mean _already?" _Paul asked. "We've been here a little over ten hours."

"Oh. Okay. Baby okay?"

Brian grinned again. "Absolutely beautiful."

"I think we all need to head home and get some rest," Dallas said. "Catch a few hours of that and get a decent meal. Tell Stef we will be back later."


	48. Chapter 48

**Chapter 48**

_Six months later:_

Audrey was now an adorable, beguiling, blond baby. Whatever had happened to cause Steffi to cramp and bleed toward the end of her pregnancy appeared to have no effect on Audrey whatsoever. She was as close to perfectly normal as anyone.

Audrey Barbara had been named for both of her grandmothers (Audrey had been Steffi's late mother), and already she was drawing attention of her own when her parents would take her to shows. It was almost a guarantee that Brian wouldn't have a shortage of sitters among the divas to stay with the baby girl while he and Stef did their thing before the crowds. The only challenge was keeping up with the petite baby, who was a very quick crawler with curious fingers.

And now those little fingers were curled in a fist, wrapped around a clump of Paul's hair.

"**AHHHHH! **Kid, that's attached to my head!" he cried while trying to disengage Audrey's fingers. "That's hair! Let go! Jesus!"

"What the hell are you yelling about, man?" Brian asked.

"I think your kid is trying to make me bald," Paul replied, still trying to pry Audrey's fingers loose. "What are you teaching her, to be a masochist that hates all the male species except you?"

"Dude, she's six months old; she doesn't know any better. You think she hasn't grabbed my and her mother's hair more than once? Be thankful she isn't old enough to go for anyone's balls just yet."

"Fucking hell, you Italians are vicious," Paul replied, finally getting Audrey loose and rubbing his head.

"Hand her over," Brian said, picking up his baby daughter. "Come here, _il mio poco amore, _it's not nice to pull Uncle Paul's hair. He's very neurotic about his hair."

"Oh you're just a barrel of laughs, Spanky."

"Yeah, well, she probably needs changed anyway; it hasn't been done since before we came to the arena."

He gave Audrey a grin while she patted his face. "So what did you think, Little Bit? Did your _mamma e papà _do a kick ass job out there with Uncle Zeke tonight or what?"

Audrey gave a wide smile, having no idea what was being said, and continued to pat her father's face.

"I take that as a yes," Brian grinned at her. "Okay, let's go change the butt cover before your _mamma_ comes back later and has a shit fit."

"No offense, dude, but if I were that size, Zeke would scare the living fuck out of me."

"Are you kidding?" Brian replied. "She and Zeke are nuts about each other. The other night after a show, it was like one minute, he's tossing around and beating the hell out of Truth and the next, he's in our room, in his baby blue pajamas with matching hat, Audrey in the crook of his arm while reading _Cat in the Hat _to her. Steffi fucking loved the sight of it."

"Where is Steffi anyway?" Paul asked as he watched his best friend drag out a changing pad and other supplies before laying Audrey down to change her.

"Stef went out with some of the girls. I told her to go ahead and I'd keep an eye on Little Bit while she was out. It's not every day she gets much time to herself anymore. God knows Stef could use some time away now and then. With this new story line and the baby here, it's taken quite a bit out of her."

"I can't believe they went with the whole Stockholm Syndrome thing. I mean, Steffi a _heel?_ Look at her! She's sweet faced."

"Me neither, but she's really getting into it, working on her promos and shit. Stef really wasn't supposed to do any, but since it leaked on the Internet about her hearing problem, Creative kind of took it and ran. She's probably the first near-deaf heel known to the company. Or first hearing-impaired talent, for that matter."

"With cheesy rocker attire and all to match yours. Jesus, you two are going to have stories to tell that kid when she gets older. That is, when you aren't beating off her boyfriends with a baseball bat."

"Baseball bat, hell. I'll have a fucking ice pick sharpened and ready to go if some dude even as much as looks at this girl the wrong way. They'll sleep with the fishes."

Brian then picked up Audrey again. "There you go, Little Bit. Feel better?"

Audrey gave him another wide smile while he dug in a diaper bag for a bottle. "Good girl. Now we can fill up your tummy so you can load _this _diaper later."

"Wow, that looks tasty," Paul joked as Brian studied the bottle, making sure it was to the specifications Steffi described.

"It fills her up," Brian said, indicating Audrey. "Speaking of which, how about you make yourself useful and run to Burger King? I could use some food myself. I'll buy."

"How could I pass that up? Sure, whatever you like."

"Don't bring me any of that spicy Angry Whopper bullshit," Brian warned. "I have a baby to watch; I don't plan on spending it hugging the toilet because you think it's funny to give me that hot sauce shit or whatnot."

"I'll get us combo meals."

"Good slave boy. Let me know when you get back."

He then sat back, giving Audrey her bottle after Paul had gone, grinning to himself at the thought what fans would really think if they saw such an arrogant heel giving his daughter a bottle as she smiled up at him.


	49. Chapter 49

**Chapter 49**

_Great,_ Steffi thought, eying the group of men in the living room. _I should have expected this, especially with it being the Super Bowl._

With the exception of Audrey, she felt almost invisible. Even Brian and Dallas had been too engrossed in the game and the other guys, with the exception of calling out or signing to her to get a drink or snacks or some other thing.

Paul had opted out of the festivities; he wasn't into football. Steffi wondered if she and Audrey should have joined _him_ instead, but didn't want her daughter exposed to horror movies. Best to stay home and tolerate the lesser of the two evils. She needed to do laundry anyway.

She plopped Audrey in Brian's lap. "I need to go check the laundry; it should be done by now. Keep an eye on her for a few?"

"Yeah, sure, sweetheart, whatever you like," he replied, not paying much attention, before going back to cursing the action on the screen.

"Don't be using that kind of language around her," Steffi warned.

"She's eight months old; it isn't like she's going to pick it up yet. Freaking hell."

Audrey remained on his lap, oblivious to what was going on around her. Between plays, Brian was smiling down at her, giving Audrey a tickle now and then.

"My God, dude," one of the other guys chuckled,. "If I didn't know any better, I'd say your ovaries were tingling for a _second_ one."

"Very fucking funny, asshole," Brian replied. "Can't a guy love his own daughter to pieces? I mean, look at her. She's gorgeous."

"She is," Dallas agreed, before something on the screen drew his attention. "For the love of God…"

"Hey, fuckwipe!" Brian yelled at the TV. "You're supposed to throw it to the guys in the _black_ shirts, not the red ones! Jesus Christ."

Audrey began to fuss a little, now tired of being in Brian's lap. "All right, Little Bit, you can go crawl around," he grinned, gently putting her on the floor. "Don't do anything I wouldn't do."

She happily took off, exploring the feet and legs around her. The sounds in the room that continued were occasional curses from either Brian or someone else and cheers when a touchdown was made during the game.

Soon they heard a strange sound and dirty looks went around with each other making faces at the smell that filled the room.

"All right, who the hell farted?" Dallas asked.

No one confessed, but a few held their noses instead.

"Jesus, Brian, what crawled up your ass and _died?" _Dallas pressed.

"Why do I always get blamed?" Brian cried. "I didn't do a damn thing."

He then looked down at the floor, raising an eyebrow. "Wait a minute," he said, picking up Audrey and taking a whiff as she laughed. "Never mind, I found our culprit, though I don't think it was a fart. I shall return."

"Figures he'd blame the baby," Dallas joked as they went back to the game.

Brian came back out a few minutes later, putting Audrey back on the floor to crawl and sprayed Febreze to eliminate the odor that still lingered. "Did I miss anything?"

"Not really," one of the other guys replied, "but can you make this room smell any more _gay? _I think baby shit was the better option."

Brian looked at the bottle. "Rain clean," he read. "It'll be out of the room in a couple of minutes. Besides, it's Stef that buys this stuff."

"Just like the Hello Kitty soap dispenser in the bathroom," Dallas snickered.

"Dallas, you know that belongs to Steffi," Brian narrowed his eyes. "Anyway, let me take this down to the garbage chute." He picked up a plastic bag with the dirty diaper in it. "I'll be back in a couple minutes."

The others nodded, once again engrossed in the game. Brian went down the hall and tossed the bag down the chute before going back to join the others. He didn't bother closing the door all the way, figuring Steffi would be back with the laundry shortly.

_Several minutes later._

Steffi had come back with the laundry basket, putting things away as the group still cheered and cursed the game out in the living room. It was only after she had put towels in the linen closet that she realized she hadn't seen Audrey.

"Brian, where's the baby?" she asked.

"I put her down to crawl after I changed her. Why?"

"I haven't seen Audrey since I came back."

"Don't worry about it; she's probably hiding under something again."

Steffi sighed and rolled her eyes, going on the hunt for her baby daughter. Audrey crawled so fast, it was difficult to keep up with her at times, but she was tiny for her age and could easily hide in tight spaces with no problem.

Steffi checked every last crevice of the house, her panic rising at no sight of Audrey anywhere.

"She isn't in here at all," she finally said.

"Huh?" Brian sprang to attention.

"Audrey. She's gone. She isn't in here."

"Did you check the bedrooms?"

"I checked every crack and crevice of this place. She's _gone."_

Dallas got up to comfort her. "Now, sweetheart, don't be upset. I'm sure she didn't get very far. I'll look for her again. Maybe there's a spot she's discovered that we know nothing about. You know babies." He pulled up Brian. "Come on, Dad, we have a missing crawler to find."

_Meanwhile:_

A neighbor had stepped outside the unit he shared with his wife to enjoy a cigar once halftime started. Though his wife would enjoy the pageantry of the halftime show, he had no interest in it.

He was about to light his cigar when he spotted movement before recognizing the baby girl from the unit three doors down happily crawling in the hallway. He chuckled, going to scoop her up.

"Well, hello there, young lady," he cooed to a laughing Audrey. "I think we better get you back to where you live. Your mommy's probably worried out of her mind."

He made his way to the apartment, Audrey in his arms, and then knocking on the door. When Steffi had opened it, her panic turned to relief.

"Audrey!" she sighed, a grateful look on her face.

The neighbor handed her over to Steffi. "Found her in the hallway while I was out about to have a smoke," he explained.

"Thank you so much, Mr. Hamilton," she said, happily taking her daughter.

"Anytime," he smiled. "You may want to make sure your door is closed. Those little ones can get out pretty fast."

"Certainly," she said, glaring toward Brian. "I'll be sure to let my _husband_ know."

As soon as Steffi closed the door and latched it, she walked over with Audrey, giving Brian a healthy whack on the head.

"**OUCH! **Jesus, Stef, what the fuck?"

"You left the door open and Audrey got out," she scolded, putting the baby back on the carpet. "Luckily, Mr. Hamilton was out there and saw her or Lord knows what might have happened."

"I left it ajar," he countered. "I knew you were coming up with the laundry."

"I had the spare key for this reason; I could have gotten myself in. You know we have to keep the door closed with her crawling around. Who knows what's going to happen once she starts to walk."

Brian gave her a pouty look. "I'm sorry. I'll be more careful next time." The pout was replaced with a sexy smile.

"Aw, I can't stay mad at you when you smile like that," she said, hugging him from behind. "But yes, just make sure all doors and windows are securely closed from now on."

Steffi then went into the kitchen to replenish the snack and drink supply as he looked at her back.

"And to think she's the one that wants a _second_ kid," he shuddered. "Holy shit."


	50. Chapter 50 CONCLUSION

**Chapter 50-CONCLUSION**

As Audrey transitioned from babyhood into being a lovely blond toddler, Steffi had found herself getting restless. Although she loved Brian and Audrey beyond reason and had a life she'd dreamed of for years, at the same time, Steffi had felt something was missing.

Once she'd gone back to school, Steffi knew what she wanted to do. Though her short time on TV as part of her husband's story line had been fun for the most part, she wanted to do something that was a bit more of substance.

When Audrey was nineteen months old, Steffi had gotten pregnant again, this time giving birth to a healthy nine pound boy, Heath. Unlike his blond, blue-green eyed older sister, Heath was dark haired and had the aquamarine eyes of his mother. Two children being enough, Steffi had a tubal ligation right after Heath was born.

Steffi had gotten her degree shortly after Audrey passed her second birthday and Heath had begun to crawl., Not only had she secured a teaching position at a school for the deaf, but also­–via Brian's nudging the right people–had landed a part time position as an American Sign Language interpreter for visitors and wrestling fans with hearing difficulties.

A big move came when Heath was a year old and Audrey had started preschool. Noticing Steffi's creative writing skills as well as her working well with people as an interpreter, management approached her about joining the creative team. She was hesitant at first, being she loved her teaching position, but encouraged by Dallas and Brian, on top of the money and benefits being far better than that of her teaching job, Steffi went for it.

She never would look back from there. Steffi was thoroughly enjoying herself, not to mention she had the added perk of seeing more of her husband and time to spend with Audrey and Heath. She met fascinating new people and management loved her. In addition, she was a calming effect on her husband, making Brian far less defiant toward authority, even when he didn't agree with some aspects.

All it took was one dirty look and an impatient tap of her foot from his wife to change Brian's mind about doing or saying anything stupid; as Steffi liked to tell those around her, "My husband would rather have his corneas poked out with an ice pick than have a woman yell at him."

In the meantime, once the kids had been old enough, Brian had insisted they too learn sign language in order to be able to communicate with their mother. Steffi didn't always wear her hearing aids, and he didn't want the kids to have the impression their mother was ignoring them when Steffi wasn't facing them as they talked. Both had picked it up quickly in spite of their young ages.

Now that she worked on her laptop on another creative angle while Brian was engrossed in something on TV, Audrey and Heath were tugging on her jeans.

"Hi sweeties," she smiled down at them. "What's up?"

"Heath says bad words," Audrey said.

Steffi looked confused. "What bad words, honey?"

Eighteen month old Heath grinned at her. "Chit."

She looked down at her son and then at Audrey. "Did he say what I thought he did? If so, where did he get that?"

Audrey pointed toward Brian. "Papa say bad words."

"I should have known," Steffi sighed. "**BRIAN DAVID!"**

"What?" he asked. "Shit, I sit here at home and I _still_ get in trouble."

"Chit!" Heath laughed.

"_That," _Steffi glared at Brian. "You taught these kids to curse already."

"Heath picked it up by accident! I swear!"

"Brian, honestly, you need to start watching your mouth around these two. They're at that age now. You're lucky neither of these two are dropping the F bomb, or I'd really have issues with you."

"Chit," Heath repeated as Audrey disappeared for a moment.

"Heath Christian, that is not cute," Steffi scolded. "Nice boys don't use those words."

"Bad words," Audrey added, bringing back a bar of soap. "Wash out Papa's mouth."

"Don't think I haven't considered that, sweetie," Steffi said, glaring back at Brian.

"Oh sure, pick on the short blond guy," Brian scoffed.

"The short blond guy with a dirty mouth," Steffi responded. "Seriously, keep that language at your job. In the meantime, you better figure out a way to make your son _unlearn_ your 'colorful' words."

"Fine, let me take them out for awhile," Brian groaned.

"Don't fill them up on junk," Steffi said. "Dinner's in a few hours."

She then watched them leave before going back to her work, reflecting back on the life she had come from the last few years to where she was presently. And in spite of his own quirks, it had been Brian who had made it all possible for her. She still thanked Dallas to this day for bringing him into her life, and would continue to do so in the years to come.

_For all those times you stood by me  
For all the truth that you made me see  
For all the joy you brought to my life  
For all the wrong that you made right  
For every dream you made come true  
For all the love I found in you  
I'll be forever thankful baby  
You're the one who held me up  
Never let me fall  
You're the one who saw me through through it all _

_You were my strength when I was weak  
You were my voice when I couldn't speak  
You were my eyes when I couldn't see  
You saw the best there was in me  
Lifted me up when I couldn't reach  
You gave me faith 'coz you believed  
I'm everything I am  
Because you loved me_

_You gave me wings and made me fly  
You touched my hand I could touch the sky  
I lost my faith, you gave it back to me  
You said no star was out of reach  
You stood by me and I stood tall  
I had your love I had it all  
I'm grateful for each day you gave me  
Maybe I don't know that much  
But I know this much is true  
I was blessed because I was loved by you _

_You were my strength when I was weak  
You were my voice when I couldn't speak  
You were my eyes when I couldn't see  
You saw the best there was in me  
Lifted me up when I couldn't reach  
You gave me faith 'coz you believed  
I'm everything I am  
Because you loved me_

_You were always there for me  
The tender wind that carried me  
A light in the dark shining your love into my life _  
_You've been my inspiration  
Through the lies you were the truth  
My world is a better place because of you_

_You were my strength when I was weak  
You were my voice when I couldn't speak  
You were my eyes when I couldn't see  
You saw the best there was in me  
Lifted me up when I couldn't reach  
You gave me faith 'coz you believed  
I'm everything I am  
Because you loved me_

_I'm everything I am  
Because you loved me _

"Because You Loved Me"-Celine Dion


End file.
